Hoseok's POV
"To be honest, it's not that big of a goal. It's just, becoming someone valuable to someone else? isn't it meaningful? That's a personal goal of mine" I said into my phone nervous of the consequences of my words. It was another lonely birthday where I decided to open up to my fans in my short live stream. For a second I said what I was thinking not really knowing what could come up of my one wish. It might have sounded selfish saying that I wanted to find someone that would value me knowing I had millions of fans that felt that way towards me. But I was finally ready to admit I needed someone in my personal life. For the past 7 plus years I have only concentrated on my career and my love life has taken a backseat. It wasn't difficult since the other member's were going through the same and I didn't feel alone because we had each other's support. All 7 of us had career goals and we all agreed that our career would come first.
Once we started to take off and we felt comfortable with how well we were doing Jin decided to shock us with the news of his secret relationship with Min. I think this was the start of the others realizing that they were finally ready to welcome love into their lives. Namjoon and Yoongi were the next ones to find love. Jin was lucky enough to find someone that complemented him since the very beginning and if they had any issues none of us ever knew about it. Yoongi and Namjoon were a different story. Unfortunately we all watched as Yoongi found someone special but it didn't last long at the time. We also witnessed Namjoon's and Ella's love story and their crazy ups and downs. I have to admit it scared me to live their heartbreak. I saw how two of my stronger brothers were broken because of love. I sat with Yoongi in silence after many performances and felt his pain for the love he had lost. I gave Namjoon a shoulder to cry on while he missed Ella. It felt like it was never going to end.
Thankfully time passed and brought happiness to my brothers. Namjoon was able to fix his issues with Ella and bring her to Korea to be with him. Yoongi took a little longer but he was able to reencounter that lost love and gained an additional reason to be happy. My little niece Mia was a wonderful surprise for all of us. We loved her from the very beginning and I personally can not imagine our lives without her. Now seeing how happy my brothers are, even the ones that have not decided their love life yet are having a good time. Has made me realize that it's my turn. When I said those words on my birthday live stream I was not expecting for it to find me so soon after.
On one of the few days we had off, Jimin and I had volunteered to help Yoongi Hyung babysit our niece Mia. I was not ready for that task. I think that the 3 of us underestimated the 1 year old ball of energy. Fourteen hour practice days had nothing on 4 hours of Mia's play time. I was exhausted by the time she took her nap and I headed to my room to relax. I had made lunch earlier that day for us but Jimin had wanted to make desert and he stayed in the kitchen. Not long after being in my room I heard the door go off and I knew Ara was back from work. When I walked into the dinning room to greet her I was not expecting for her to bring someone home. I had never stopped breathing just at the sight of a girl. Due to my job I had the pleasure of meeting countless of beautiful girls but none of them compared to the dream girl in front of me. The long black hair with strands that shaped her soft baby face and the flawless white as milk skin that seemed to turn red in seconds were the first things I noticed. She was so small that Jimin towered over her and by Jimin's face he seemed to like that fact. Once she opened her mouth to speak I felt my manhood stand in attention to her shy quiet voice. When she said my last name I had to control myself. I closed my fist not in anger but in pure uncontrollable pleasure of hearing my name in her mouth. I don't know what happened after but I just remember staring at her unable to look away. When Jimin volunteered us to take her somewhere I thanked the universe for giving me extra time to see her face. I surprised myself with the way I was acting. While I always try to be bright and sunny for some reason I couldn't at this moment. I was serious and quiet even when Jimin was asking the girl a million of question on our way to her destination. All I could do was drive and try to concentrate on the road but I couldn't help looking in the rearview mirror searching her eyes.
I thought that day would be the last I would see of her but Ara informed us that she had become good friends with the girl called Sun. I was not expecting to literally run into her a few weeks later. It was the day before our online concert and we had the day off to prepare for the next day. I had decided to go out shopping which has become one of my favorite hobbies. I had entered one of my favorite sneaker stores and I noticed a familiar girl on the corner of the store. I quickly stopped walking as soon as I saw her and took this time to just stare at her. I knew it was her. I felt it in my skin. Last time I had seen her she was in a full ballerina outfit and even though I knew she was younger than me, I didn't think the age difference was that big. But seeing her that day made me realize she was still a child. It pained me that she was that beautiful and at the same time unreachable. To my surprise her baby face was covered in small tears. I felt my heart tug and at the same time I felt this anger and needed to know who hurt her. It didn't take me long to realize the reason for her tears. A guy holding another girl could be seen beyond her and even though I didn't know any more details I could guess that Sun was upset over the couple's intimate moment. I wanted to take Sun away and hide her from what was making her feel like this. I approached her with the intention to tap on her shoulder and ask her if she was ok but once I was close enough to do so she turned around so rapidly that she slammed into my chest. What I had felt the first time I met her didn't compare to what I was feeling at this moment. I tried to not move but my whole body burned with her closeness. She smelled so good and felt just like I had imagined. She apologized a millions time and it felt wrong to accept her apology since I enjoyed the moment so much. I pretended not to recognize her and honestly I did it because I didn't want her to know I had not forgotten her face even after I had only met her for a few minutes. I didn't want to admit to myself that she had taken over my thoughts and dreams.
The next time I saw her was the confirmation I needed to not pursue her. The afternoon of the concert Namjoon told us that Ella and Ara had invited their new friend to the group's apartment. I knew it was Sun before Namjoon had the chance to say her name. The whole ride home I had to tell myself that I needed to control my feelings. It's like I was back in High school my hormones where all over the place. The other member's fell in love with her instantly once they saw her sitting on the floor playing with Mia. I have to admit she looked too fucking adorable. The perfect combination of child like wonder and womanhood. She played with Mia and matched her energy but at the same she looked like a wet dream.
Most of the night I was too distracted by the fact that I need to control my feelings that I forgot to smile. I was trying so hard not to stare at her like a lost puppy that I forgot how to be myself. Once the guys started drinking I decided to join them. It felt like the first time I could fully relax since I walked in the door. After a couple of drinks I had even stopped looking her way. Once I started to be myself again I took the risk to look for her and noticed she had passed out on a corner of the room. I knew she had been playing with Mia all night and I figured my niece had claimed another soul. I saw her curl up in a ball and again my heart ached for her. Her small face looked almost angelic and It was another reason why she was not meant for me. She was too young, she was too pure. It didn't take long for the girls to notice their friend had checked out and when Ara approached Jimin and I to ask us if one of us could drive them home. Jimin insisted they should stay. I wanted to object but I couldn't. Seeing Sun's sleepy face was enough to stop me. I watched as Hae tried to wake her up and failed. Jimin who joined her in the living room volunteered to carry her to our room and I felt my blood boil over that small gesture. I knew Jimin had the greatest of intentions but just imagining him touching her in that way was enough for me to get up and before anyone could react I had Sun in my arms. I carried her bridal style with no effort on my part. She was so light that it surprised me. Jimin and Hae stared at me and I could tell I had shocked them both but they didn't say anything. Once I started walking towards my room I felt her move in my arms and I looked down to see her nestle herself on my chest. I don't have an explanation of what I felt at that moment. I just know that something inside me changed. I had heard Namjoon describe the moment he felt for Ella and knew he was meant for her and this felt exactly the same. I was no longer Jung Hoseok, I was no longer Jhope of BTS, I was no longer Hobi. I was this girl's protector and nothing more mattered in life.
My mind was full of mixed emotions in one hand something told me she was not the girl for me but something else, something stronger didn't want to care. As I saw her more I learned new things about her and my feeling grew against my own will. I heard how much she cared about her family and I witnessed the love she felt for her younger brother. She was caring and hard working. Unfortunately she wanted a normal life and that really hit me hard because I couldn't give her that. I knew she wasn't for me even though my heart felt differently. I experienced how Ara and Ella had to deal with being in our lives. And I saw how it took a toll on Namjoon and Yoongi. They wanted to protect them as much as possible but they couldn't be with them 24/7 . Thankfully the girls were strong and handled very thing that was thrown their way. I couldn't imagine shy and pure Sun be able to do the same. But against my will It became very difficult not to fall for her and my need to be closer to her increased. There were moments where I couldn't control myself like when her dance crew auditioned for our company and I had to sit there and watch her dance for the first time. It took all my self control to not kiss her once we were alone.
I had heard from Ara that Sun had to quit all her side jobs to prepare for the audition with her dance crew and she was hurting financially. I wanted to find a way to help her and at the same time have her close. I had the bright idea to make her my new assistant even though I never needed one before. I was determined to have her in my life even if I couldn't have her the way I wanted. In my eyes she was a still a child and I was passed that phase of my life. I need a strong women by my side and Sun was not it.
The first couple of weeks were awkward between us. I was not used to having an assistant and I have to admit I didn't know what I was doing. Most of the time I made up things for her to do that made her stay with me for longer than I needed. Of course that would backfire on me multiple of times. Every time I was close enough to smell her perfume my hands would shake out of the need to touch her. I knew it was wrong, I knew I was not what she wanted. We had spoken about her wants and needs and she made it very clear that she wanted a normal life and a normal life was not something I could offer. Plus I needed someone different than her. I was just delusional thinking she might change her mind or I would change mine.
All this brings me to tonight. I am sitting here in our group apartment listening to Yoongi, Jin and Namjoon go on and on about their significant others deciding to go on a girl's night. My brothers who are overprotective of their girls don't seem to like the idea. Yoongi who has been a mess since Ara left to live with Hae has the not so great idea of crashing their night. Namjoon and Jin are hesitant at first but Yoongi ends up convincing them after a while. I know Sun is also with the girls and I don't know how to feel about it. Believe me I want to be like my brothers but I don't have any right to.
"It's decided" Yoongi says with determination while getting up from the couch. "Get ready we leave in 10 minutes" he looks at all 3 of us.
"Why are you looking at me?" I ask in a chuckle.
"Hoba you coming with us" Yoongi orders.
"What?" I ask surprised.
"If you are there the girls will not yell at us" Yoongi says implying I know what he means.
"Good idea Yoongi, they won't be able to mistreat us if Jhope is there. They love him too much" Jin says turning to me to smile and wink. He is right, the girls love me as much as I love them. I try to be their sunshine any chance I get.
"Me being there is no guarantee my sisters wont kick your ass for being jealous jerks that ruin their night out" I joke knowing it's not true. The girls would probably enjoy having them there.
"You going and its final" Yoongi orders again and I lift my hands up in defeat.
"Do we know where they are going?" Namjoon asks getting up to join Yoongi.
"Yes I asked my brother in law Bong and he has their location" Yoongi answers taking his phone out from his pocket.
"Ok then lets go" Jin joins the rest of the guys and with those last famous words we get ready for the night.
We make it to the Karaoke place less than 30 minutes after our initial conversation. Thanks to Namjoon's call ahead we enter through a back door avoiding any crowd. Which is good since we are not dressed in disguise. Tonight we match which is not rare for us. Black is our color of choice for the night and I went with black jeans and black t-shirt. Our security which is always with us stays back once we find the private room the girls had booked. We meet Bong outside the door and once we are ready for what's on the other side he opens the door. The girls are all gathered around the small stage and my body stiffens when I notice Sun-Hee. She looks breath taking with her hair in curls and her pink skirt. I stare in awe of her and I hear one of the guys speak but I don't pay attention to his voice. Even though my eyes are only on Sun I notice my brothers approach their girls and they seem to be in the same state of shock. I don't blame them, my sisters-in law look amazing.
Sun-Hee stares back at me and I think she is as affected as me. The people in the room move around us and Sun breaks our bond by taking a seat with the others. I follow her and take the seat next to her. I haven't said a word and I don't know if there is anything I can say right now. I don't know who decide to play a game of truth or dare but I agree to join. Once the game starts I try not to look next to me and concentrate on the conversation going around the table.
"Ok Hoba, truth or dare?" I hear Namjoon ask once it's my turn.
"Truth" I says leaning forward in my seat anxious of what's coming.
"Is there someone you like?" Namjoon asks and he takes me by surprise.
"Yes" I answer quickly without thinking. I laugh nervously realizing that I actually said it. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my chest. I have been trying to hide my true feelings for so long and I don't think I could last another day.
"Hobi is it ok if I ask Namjoon his question?" Ella asks bringing me back to the game.
"Yes go right ahead little sister ask away" I say glad that the attention is away from me.
After a few rounds we learn a few secrets including the biggest one. Namjoon and Ella have gotten married and are expecting. We all congratulate them and I can't believe another niece or nephew will join our little family. Time is going by so fast and my brothers are taking advantage and living their life as happy as possible. I start to feel this high of pure joy for this moment and it makes me think of what I really want in life.
"Ok last contestant" I hear Jin say and he takes me away from my thoughts.
"I am sorry Sun but I will give my spot to Jhope since he didn't get to ask a question to Namjoon" Ara says and for a moment I think she knows something I don't.
"Thank you Ara" I say with a smile and I turn to Sun so I can stare into her eyes when I say what I am about to say. "Truth or dare?" I ask with a smile.
"Truth" Sun says shyly.
"Do you want to kiss me?" I ask quickly without thinking too much about the question. I don't smile hoping she will understand I am being serious.
"Da... da... dare" Sun stutters to answer and I think I was expecting for her to avoid my question because the next words out of my mouth shock me.
"Kiss me" I say. No I demand.
"I don't think I want to play anymore" Sun says and she tries to smile but fails. I go numb and everything I was thinking up to now goes out the window. She rejected me twice. What can I do about that? I hear the others start to make noice and I know they are doing it to alleviate the tension forming. I laugh at the situation and I do my best to play it off as a flirty joke and the others seem to buy it including Sun who just smiles. I take one of the beers on the table which is not mine and I take a long drink. For the remainder of the night I sit there in awkward silence unsure of what to do or say.
Once the others are tired or drunk we decide to head home. Hae asks if she can stay the night with us in the apartment since Ara has decided to go to Yoongi's new apartment with him. I will be by myself at the apartment since Jimin, JK and Tae have gone back home to their families and Jin and Namjoon have their own apartment in the building. The place will be practically empty which makes me say yes to Hae since there will be plenty of empty rooms. Namjoon, Ella, Jin and Min all leave in the car that brought us here and Yoongi and Ara call for another car to pick them up. Bong stays back with Hae, Sun and I and we all wait at the empty parking lot for our car to arrive.
"Sun I think you should come to the boys apartment with me. You had too much to drink" I hear Hae say and it makes me look at Sun for the first time since the awkward thing happened.
"No I should go home" Sun says and apart from her rosy cheeks there is nothing else that can show she had too much to drink.
"It's not safe for you to be out this late and specially like this" Bong says to Sun while he wraps an arm around Hae.
"Yes I agree" Hae says. "Come back to the boys place with me"
"Let's not make her do something she doesn't want to do" I say and my words are harsher than I meant. I am pissed off because of what happened but at the same time I am more pissed that this girl refuses to let others take care of her.
"Ok I will go" she says and I can barely hear her words.
"Good! We are all sleeping at Hobi's. Well except for Bong who needs to wait until marriage to be in the same house as me" Hae chuckles and I look away.
We make it back to the apartment shortly after and once we are inside Hae lays on the couch without hesitation and before I can say that she can take any room she wants she is fast asleep. I look around unsure of what to do. Sun and I are alone and even though I am still mad I can feel my heart beating faster.
"You can pick any room you want they were all cleaned this morning" I say trying to avoid my feelings.
"I don't like sleeping alone" she says and I look back at her unsure of her tone. I watch as she comes closer to me and I feel my hands start to shake again.
"I can carry Hae to what ever room you choose" I say slowly thinking that's what she meant.
"You know I got my heart broken today?" She says and I can see her eyes water.
"You not the only one." I say to myself not wanting her to hear.
"I really liked this guy so much and he just broke my heart like it was nothing" she continues and I watch the pain in her eyes. "I wanted to give him all my love" I look away from her pained face trying to restrain myself from finding something to punch. It breaks me that someone else had her heart and broke it and here I am ready to fix it.
"He doesn't deserve it" I say trying to calm myself.
"What if I was not sure he is the one? What if in my heart there is someone I want to spoil with my love and give him all of me." She asks.
"You will probably find someone soon" I try to ignore how I feel about her words. I am still angry and not so much at her. I am angry at myself for putting us in this position. I should have left things alone. The way they were. I told myself a millions times she was not the girl for me. I should have listened.
"Mr. Jung" she says and my cock twitches at the mention of my last name in her mouth and all thoughts go out the window. "I am ready to play again" she comes closer and I stiffen.
"I think you should go to bed" I say not sure what she is talking about. It must be the many drinks talking.
"Dare" she says grabbing my face in her tiny hands and slamming her lips against mine. I am frozen for a second shocked at what she is doing. I think she feels the same when some time passes and her lips are still on mine but neither of us move. I feel her start to move back and I regain control of my body afraid that I will not get another chance to have her like this. I move one hand to her waist holding her in place and my other hand makes it's way to her soft neck. I pull her back to my lips and this time I open her mouth with mine. She is hesitant and it makes me think she has no practice with kissing and it makes me want her even more. I know I shouldn't do this. I know she is drunk but I don't care. I can't help it. I finally taste her and she is sweeter than I ever imagined. I feel for her tongue with mine and I am met with a hint of alcohol but her natural taste is so overwhelming that I barely notice it. She seems to approve since I feel her body move closer to mine. This makes me deepen the kiss and I am no longer gentle. I bite her lower lip and the moan that follows makes me loose control. I grab her face with both hands and deepen the kiss even more. I move rougher and her hands make their way to my hair.
Between the haze of emotions I start to think about where we are and the fact she is drunk. Against every will in my body I end the kiss and move back. I can't help but smile when I notice her lips are still in a kissing position and she still has her eyes closed. I take a minute to watch as her euphoric face changes to longing. Without any words I take her hand again and guide her to my room. Once we are in front of my bed I notice her eyes on me. Nothing is said between us but I can tell she wants to continue what we started as much as I do. Again I go against all my feelings and I lead her to lie on the bed. I lie beside her and turn her to face me. I kiss her but this time is just quick and short. I can see disappointment in her eyes and I know she was expecting something else. I smile and pull her closer to me so her head is nestled on my chest. Sleep is the only thing that will happen between us.
I hear a faint voice say my name and I open my eyes to a slightly lit room. The morning sun is not completely out yet and its probably only the early hours of the day. I look down and to my pleasure Sun is still in the same position. I run my fingers through her soft face and I tuck a small strand of hair behind her ear. She is stunning even when she is asleep.
I hear my name again and I search around the room to find the source of the noice and I notice Yoongi standing at the foot of my bed.
"Hoba, are you awake" Yoongi says again.
"Yes" I say lifting my head up as much as possible without moving the rest of my body in order to not wake up Sun.
"The others are coming in a few hours for our meeting" Yoongi says without acknowledging what is in front of him. "I also woke Hae up and told her to take Tae's room. She probably didn't sleep well on that couch" he continues nonchalant and I cant believe he wont comment on Sun being on the same bed as me. I am about to say something when I feel Sun move and she places a hand on my waist and pulls me closer. This distracts me for a second but she moves again by placing a leg over mine and slowly moves it closer to my morning hard cock. I can feel my jeans get tighter and I am afraid Yoongi will notice. Last night we laid on top of the comforter and we were so close to each other all night that I don't think we ever felt the need for it. Which means Yoongi has a front row seat to my morning wood.
"Thanks Hyung. I will meet you in a few minutes" I say and my words are rushed.
"Yes we have a lot to talk about" He says without moving and I feel like he knows what I am trying to avoid.
"Just give me 5 minutes" I say gesturing to the door with my head but Yoongi does not budge and I sense he is messing with me. "Just go I will join you soon" I continue to push for him to leave. I really don't want to give him a show and Sun is not making it better by moving her leg closer.
"Ara is making breakfast you both should join when you are awake" Yoongi says and he finally turns around to leave.
"Will do" I say thankful he left just in time. Sun stirs next to me once more and I close my eyes to try to calm my painful erection. Once I feel I have it under control I open my eyes and notice her eyes are open as well. I look down to see her looking up at me. I was expecting her to freak out and push me away but she doesn't. I don't speak afraid that anything I say might scare her away. I watch as she just stare at me in what feels like awe and my heart tugs for her. I move my hand to her and I lift her face so it's even closer to mine. I kiss her slowly not caring that none of us have brushed our teeth. She no longer taste of alcohol and her sweet taste is still there. She kisses me back with the same need I feel and I move my hand to her long locks. I pull her face even closer to deepen the kiss and before I know it we are making out. This does not help what I currently feel under my waist and when she moves to be on top of me I feel like my jeans are going to rip away. I move both my hands to the side of her face needing for us to be more connected. She straddles me and the only thing separating our body parts are the clothes we are still wearing. The make out session goes for what feels like an eternity and with each kiss I feel myself get lost in her.