I completely forgot that Tristan and Miles were friends so for the sake of this book they are just acquaintances
****Willow's POV****
Shortly after our conversation at the party last night things began to get sour. Tristan begun to get carried away with all the games being played and got way too drunk, which ended with me having to carry him back to bed. Once we got there though his drunk state turned into one of anger which caused him to start bringing up things from our past again, which caused an argument between us that I was not going to stand for so I chucked him out.
Thankfully I hadn't bumped into Tristan on my way to go and see Ollie and Gareth as I still hadn't figured out quite where my head was at yet.
"Hi guys" I said as I entered the room to them speaking with Rez.
"You all right honey?"
"I've been looking for you two. Hi Rez."
"How are you?" He asked as I took a seat next to him.
"I'm good thanks, would it be alright if I had a moment with these two?"
"Of course, I'll see you all later."
"Um what's wrong? You don't quite look ok." Gareth asked.
"Tristan and I had this sort of stupid fight last night and it's gone on all day now and I just don't know what to do about it and I feel really shit about the whole situation."
"Do you want to get everything off your chest?"
"Tristan sometimes mentions or references a lot of girls who he's slept with or had flings with in the past and it makes me feel really uncomfortable. I don't think he would cheat or anything but I just really don't like it" I explained. "He got really drunk last night and started going on about one of them and I had to tell him to stop because I don't want to hear that."
"Is this a regular occurrence?"
"He's mentioned her before but last night he just would not stop and he was going into so much depth. It makes me feel so insecure, not even about our relationship but just about myself."
"There's going to be situations in a house like this where you've got Miles and Julius, younger guys, so he might want to keep up this bravado around them."
"Yeah, but then there's the reaction as well. It's really hard for me to stand up for myself and make my feelings heard but then when I do mention it he kind of pushed my thoughts aside which makes then whole situation worse."
"That's the basis of a respectful relationship, you both be open and honest and try to work around each other's feelings. You need to make sure that is sorted if you're going to move forward."
"I just feel really insecure at the moment and I don't know what it is. I feel like lockdown has really made me put on weight and my appearance has just gone downhill."
"But on the contrary you look fabulous and Tristan should really be telling you this. He's meant to be you're biggest fan."
"I just feel like when we do say get dressed up he's like that when we're alone but now he very rarely shows any affection when other people are around."
"The only excuse I can have for him is that we're still all getting used to being around people again so maybe he still feels a bit uncomfortable at the moment." Gareth said.
"I guess."
"I feel like you need a hug." Gareth said and came around the table to give me a hug. "Where is he by the way?"
"I don't know, the last time I saw him was last night." I told them. "Thanks guys by the way, I don't know what I'd do without you both most of the time."
"Anytime..."
"Do you ever just feel like you have so much to give to other people and you just don't get it back. I really do care about Tristan and I really have do care a lot about him and what us to be happy but then I just get upset in return." Opening up like that did make me emotional so Gareth wrapped his arms around me. "I just want to be happy."
"We love you very much." Ollie said. "That's all we want is for you to be happy, whoever that's with."
****
"Knock knock" I heard as I was just cleaning the bedroom and getting everything sorted for tonight and there stood Liv in the doorway. "Can I join you?"
"Of course." She sat opposite me on the bed as she watched me pack up the last few things. "I've really missed you, how have you been?"
"Really good actually, I've started this wellbeing course and it's really opened my eyes about some of the negatives I've been carrying in my life. I feel a lot more free now."
"You look really healthy I must say, glowing."
"Thanks lovely, I would have said the same about you but you don't look too great right now, did you get any sleep last night?" A reference to the bags under my eyes which I couldn't be bothered concealing.
"Not much, I'm guessing the boys told you."
"Yeah, they seemed really concerned actually so I said I would have a chat with you and I'm here if you need to vent."
"Tristan and I just had this fight and now the whole house seems to know about it"
"Throughout this whole relationship I've always tried to push you to take opportunities and when I first saw you and Tristan together I could see the connection you guys had, so I guess I've always tried to be this advocate for you two but most of all I am your friend and I just want you to be happy at the end of the day."
"Thank you."
"I've not exactly got the greatest track record in relationships so I don't know if I'm quite the right person to be taking advice off but..."
"Please do."
"I think probably the most important quality in a relationship is the ability to communicate and be listened to."
"Yeah"
"He needs to respect you and treat you like your the greatest person on this Earth. You need to be honest and just let everything out. You deserve so much and if he isn't willing to give it to you then he needs to re-evaluate what he wants."
"Thanks Liv"
"Hey girls." We both turned to find Tristan at the door. "Please could I speak to Willow?"
"Do you want me to stay or go?" Liv asked me.
"Yeah we need to have a chat, thanks again Liv."
"Anytime."
"I'm sure we can handle this ourselves." Tristan took the seat she had previously took but facing towards me this time. "Look I thought we could keep this between us."
"I was upset this morning so I spoke to them about it and they told Liv, they're the only people who know because of me."
"Shall we talk about it then?"
"You know when you say these things about girls you've previously slept with it makes me feel insecure and not enough for you. It makes me upset."
"I'll try not to make you feel like that in the future but it never was intentional. I never brought up those comments to make you feel bad."
"Like I've been saying though I feel like the reason we're arguing is slightly irrelevant, it's how the situation was handled between the both of us."
"Yeah"
"I know we don't get drunk like that often but when you do you almost turn into this different person and last night was probably the first time I've had to directly face you. When I was upset, it was almost like you was goading me and you didn't respect me in that way."
"I am really sorry about that and look I can't remember much about last night but if I made you feel that way then I can only apologise."
"But last night you wouldn't even entertain the conversation about how I was feeling."
"I am the type of person who can say things in haste and therefore it's just better to let things breathe first. I would hate to say something I didn't mean and hurt you in the process."
"I get that." I softly whispered and reached over to grab his hand.
"I just want to be happy with you and we've had probably no issues for a long time now that I just sort of forgot that couples do have these problems. It feels like since we've stepped foot in this house there's been drama and that's not the reason I'm here, I'm here because I love you and want to spend time with you."
"I don't know what it is at the moment but I just feel really insecure and unhappy with myself ."
"Come here." He reached over to place me in his lap. "I wish you could see yourself through my eyes right now because you're absolutely stunning."
"I love you."
"I love you too."
****
That night we were having a cosy night in as Ollie and Gareth had planned this country themes day for us all tomorrow. I had taken up this spot in one of the several lounges to chill, clad in just my loungewear with no make up on, I nestled down to read the next chapter in my book with a glass of wine.
"Can I offer you a top up?" I looked up to find Miles there.
"Of course," I raised my glass for him to pour into. "Did you want to take a seat? Sorry I'm probably not the most glamorous company right now."
"Yes please, I saw you alone in here and I just thought I would make sure you're ok?" I closed my book and curled up on the seat to make some room. "You still look stunning by the way"
"Thank you, I'm fine, I just feel like there's always so much drama when we all get together and I just want everyone to be happy."
"Tell me about it."
"Oh yeah, I heard something about you and Maeva."
"I would just like to make it clear there is no Maeva and I." When he said that I could sense some friction in his voice.
"Would you like to talk about it? I don't the full story about you both but I am a good listener."
"Maeva and I were together for about a year, probably a couple of years ago now and there wasn't much of a gap between our breakup and her getting with James." He explained. "I feel like there's just so much unspoken tension between us that I've needed to get out for a long time but there is this connection between us, even if it's just on a friendship level."
"Have you had the chance to speak to her then?"
"Yeah we went out on a walk this morning, I got a lot off my chest and hopefully we can move forward."
"Is James upset by this?"
"The thing is like when we speak sometimes it's just easier to speak in French and I understand that it can come across as rude to other people and James seems to take offence to it, but it just comes natural to us."
"I want to be honest with you, if I was in James' position I would probably be angry as well, like you two could be talking about him and he wouldn't even know it."
"But then I feel like Maeva is kind of pushing the blame all onto me and saying I always inititate it when it works both ways and we're probably both as guilty as one another."
"I love Maeva but at the same time like if she didn't like it then she could just reply in English and the whole thing would stop."
"Exactly, why can't all girls be as rational as you."
"I guess I'm just one of a kind."
"You are. So how are things between you and Tristan, I couldn't help but see him stumble out of your room last night."
"We just got into an argument but I think it's resolved now."
"You think?"
"I guess actions speak louder than words so I'll just have to see how he changes moving forward."
"I don't know either of you very well but I can tell you deserve to be treated like a queen and if he isn't doing that then more fool him."
"Thank you."
****Tristan's POV****
The country day had been organised amazingly by Gareth and Ollie, everyone had played their part and dressed up in their finest country clothing before we all gathered in the gardens. I could see Willow having a chat with Liv and Sam as I took a seat with Rez and Ruby.
"Alright mate?" Rez asked as I took a seat.
"I'm good thanks mate, how are things between the two of you?"
"We're good, still plodding along."
"I feel like I always forget how long you two have been together."
"Well it's been on and off but yeah I think it would be coming up to 2 years now." Ruby said.
"Have you thought about marriage?" I asked.
"I feel like we have a few things to work on before that." Ruby said. "Of course we've spoken about it but at the moment I don't think we're in the right place."
"Well...."
"No I agree" Rez said. "We probably argue too much right now to enjoy married life."
"I'm going to leave you guys too it because I can see James coming over." Ruby said. "See you all later."
"How are we all?" James said as he filled Ruby's seat.
"Good, how are you? Where's Maeva?"
"She's currently speaking, well arguing with Sophie, I should probably stay out of that one."
"What's happened?"
"Basically when Maeva and Miles went out yesterday Sophie spoke to me and kind of made me see that Miles isn't the only one to blame. When I spoke to Maeva about it she was not happy."
"I think there's never just one side to the story, obviously Sophie's going to stick up for her friend so I would just take it all with a pinch of salt." I told him.
"Yeah, how are you and Willow?"
"We spoke things through yesterday and hopefully it's kind of been forgotten about now."
"I actually saw her last night." Rez said. "Her and Miles were chatting in one of the living rooms."
"Oh she didn't mention it."
"I'm not saying anything happened but they seemed to be having quite a deep chat."
"Was there like contact there?" James asked him.
"I don't think it was like that, she just seemed quite stressed and so did he."
"You see this is the thing, I feel like we have an argument someone always has to know. I kept myself to myself but she went and told Ollie who told Liv, now she's probably told Miles."
"That can't be good for your relationship with them either." James said.
"Exactly, I feel like she tells Ollie all of this when we have minor arguments and it's making me look like a bad person in his eyes."
"Have you spoken to her about this?"
"I kind of mentioned it yesterday but I feel like if I say anything she'll become defensive about wanting her brother to know."
"What about Liv? She seems quite protective about Willow."
"The weirdest thing happened actually. I walked in on them having a chat the other day and she was like 'do you want me to stay?', building up this like barrier against me."
"It does sound like things could be starting to build up against you."
"I just wish we could have this private life where it's just us two but now we're living with all of these people it's probably only going to get worse."
****Author's Note****
I hope you like this chapter.
Please vote and comment any suggestions. What is the overall thought: Miles or Tristan as I feel like in these next few chapters I will have to sway one way or another.....
Xx