Chapter 136 - How could he be willing
For nine years, he didn't dare to see her or write her just a few words.
He lived in a world where half a wrong step would be a disaster.
Did she ever blame him?
Has she ever blamed him?
Did she rarely ever think of him now?
He didn't know how he turned to the front yard, but when it dawned on him, he was already standing in front of the door of the west wing.
A noise sounded in the first room, then the door opened. After a glance at him from the gap, the door was immediately closed, after which there was silence.
"I'll just see her and go," he whispered, unsure if he was telling someone else or himself.
He raised his hand and gently pushed the door in front of him open. The moonlight behind him immediately poured over his shoulders and into the room.
He lifted his foot inside and took one step at a time, walking into the room and towards the bed.
She was sleeping on her side in the bed, with a seemingly serene smile on her lips.
The moonlight from the window rim fell between him and her, as if separating them into two worlds.
A sense of déjà vu struck him, as back then, when he left that night without saying goodbye.
She slept soundly and deeply as if exhausted.
Her eyebrows were stretched densely across her brow bones, and her eyelashes rested nicely on her eyelids. Her pretty nose opened and closed slightly as she breathed, whiler her soft diamond lips were partly open with a suspiciously watery glow at the corner of her mouth.
Feng Qingbai couldn't help laughing in spite of himself.
Those lost moments seemed to suddenly turn back. His Shengsheng still drooled when she slept.
He cautiously extended his fingertips, trying to wipe off the drool stains on the corners of her mouth. Perhaps the light touch brought an itch because she moved her head in discomfort, and a disobedient blank strand slipped down and landed on the tip of her nose.
The young girl waved her hands once, twice, three times … then frowned in annoyance.
He rushed to gently dislodge the strand of hair before her eyelashes quivered, keeping his gaze greedily on her face, refusing to let go of any of her subtle, vivid expressions.
So much that she managed to successfully get his hand under her cheek. When he realized it, he'd already lost his mind.
The touch of palm against palm was tender and soft with a warmth that reached all the way to his heart – softening his heart.
"Brother Axiu…," the little girl whispered softly.
Feng Qingbai instantly stiffened, and his pupils constricted.
The two emotions of joy and upset from his heart clashed violently in his chest. He was rejoicing that she hadn't forgotten him and upset that he had been caught carelessly.
However, even if he was upset, he didn't really want to run away.
His heart hollered at him to go, but his legs stood rooted right there.
For a moment, he didn't dare to raise his eyes to her face.
He both wished she could see him, and wanted for him never to find him.
Conflicted and torn.
"… You don't come back… ignore you forever…" came a soft, somewhat indistinct mumble.
<pirate>Find authorized novels in Webnovel, faster updates, better experience, Please click <a>www.webnovel.com/book/farmer-lady-of-fortune_18308525205153705/chapter-136---how-could-he-be-willing_51567033418046869</a> for visiting.</pirate>
Feng Qingbai looked up in astonishment, but his little girl was still sleeping soundly. So that mumble just now was but a sleep-talk.
Yet he had done a full-on inner battle.
Like a clown playing a one-man show.
At this moment, Feng Qingbai suddenly felt unusually wretched.
That kind of wretchedness that made him run away.
What was he doing?
Indulge a longing to get close to her and then pull her into the abyss he was in?
And finally watch her suffer in front of him?
He had tasted that kind of agony, so how could he be willing to let her go through it as well?
The door made a thud as if it was blown by the wind, disturbing the person in the bed. She frowned a bit, then turned over and continued to sleep soundly.
Wei Hong tiptoed around and carefully closed the half-open door.
If Master trained in the hidden guard camp, this quality would certainly have failed the test. After playing the thief, he didn't shut the door, and still needed her to help him clean up his tracks.
The next day, Liu Yusheng got up and frowned in confusion as she washed her hands. "Aunt Hong, did you hear any movement last night? I seem to have heard the sound of the door opening and closing."
Wei Hong was paralyzed, but she answered sincerely, "I didn't hear anything. I think the evening wind was too strong and rattled the door."
Liu Yusheng looked at the very sturdy door panel and then at Wei Hong. "Can the wind shake a door panel that thick?"
Wei Hong looked up at the sky. "Yes."
...
"Lucky Nannan, Auntie Hong, are you ready yet? Let's go out to eat when you are!" Qian Wanjin shouted across a long porch eave in the east wing.
"Aren't we going to eat here?"
"What kind of delicious food can a normal private house make? We'd be squandering time while waiting for them to serve. It's better if we just go out and eat." In terms of refinement and taste, most private houses were no match for restaurants, and Qian Wanjin would rather spend more money and eat a delicious meal.
Liu Yusheng gave it a thought. They were now equivalent to renting a private residence. Although they would also pay money, in the end it wasn't an inn dedicated to making a living. Rather than bothering others, it was better to go out and eat by themselves. In any case, they came over to attend the convention. They also had to walk around to have a look.
"You guys go wait in the living room first. We'll be here in a moment."
When Liu Yusheng came out after changing her outfit, she found that they couldn't leave.
The round dining table placed in the living room was packed with dizzying exquisite dishes. Most importantly, Qian Wanjin has already consumed most of his share.
Giving her a thumbs up while eating.
Liu Yusheng held her forehead and thanked Uncle Fu who was standing at the round table smiling at them, "Uncle Fu, I'm sorry for troubling you. You can account for our accommodation along with the meals later."
Uncle Fu nodded and smiled, bowing and making a gesture of invitation.
"Lucky Nannan, eat this dessert, it's called Zhulan Yucui**. It's very famous in the capital. I didn't expect that someone actually made it here!" As soon as Liu Yusheng was seated, Qian Wanjin recommended, "This one too. It's a snack only found in the north – glutinous rice chicken rolls. The flavor is very authentic. Try it too…"
In no time at all, the food plate in front of her was piled high with all sorts of dishes that Qian Wanjin had pinned over, but all Liu Yusheng wanted to do was shove them in his mouth to shut him up.
The service in this place was so top-notch that it gave people the goosebumps. Did Qian Wanjin notice this at all?
She was afraid he didn't. When it came to delicious food, this golden abacus could transform into a dolt in a wink.
Liu Yusheng's breakfast was a bit unappetizing, and she didn't feel like tasting the exquisite dishes.
After breakfast, the party of four people left that small courtyard. Liu Yusheng first proposed to go find an inn and book a vacant room if there was.
"Why should we go to an inn when we're staying so well here?" Qian Wanjin raised his eyebrows. "Lucky Nannan, you're thinking too much. We're also paid for our accommodation, and the money was paid in full. There's no need to feel uncomfortable. If this family really was conspiring against us, they wouldn't have accepted the silver."
Liu Yusheng pursed her lips and didn't say anything.
Wei Hong's eyes flickered. "There's no need to change. I searched last night and there's nothing wrong with this courtyard. That Uncle Fu seems to be the servant who manages this courtyard and is used to serving people, so he is too comprehensive in what he does. It should just be his habit. He has no malicious intent."