04/12/2018
Thursday
1:12pm
You've been in the hospital for almost four days now and you were put on suicide watch and you understand that it's protocol, so you weren't arguing with anyone.
Spencer hasn't left your side since, Desiree has been visiting every day, and all your friends from work have been stopping by to see you too.
"Well I have to go now, but I'll be back later to clean up your stitches. Bye Y/N, bye Spencer." Olivia says as she makes her way to the door.
"Thanks Olivia. See you later."
"How are you feeling today?" Spencer asked, before kissing the back of your hand.
"I'm feeling...better." You responded hesitantly.
It technically wasn't a lie because you were feeling a bit better, but that voice in the back of your head kept reappearing every now and then.
You're trying your best to ignore it. And with Spencer being with you , it helps a lot.
"So I was talking with Dr. Wilson while you were asleep earlier and he told me that you'd be able to go home on Saturday."
You let out a sigh and say, "Finally. I'm getting tired of the smell here."
"You work here. You smell this all the time." Spencer says through a laugh making you laugh as well.
"I know but it's different when you have to smell it- never mind that wasn't gonna make any sense." You say and Spencer lets out a chuckle and gives you a small smile, which you return.
"But he also told me that the chief said that you'd have to take time off and go to therapy." Spencer explains to you as he holds your hand.
"Ok I can do that. I want to get better Spence. I really do." You tell him.
"And I believe that you can get better. I'll be by your side the entire time and so will Desiree." He tells you.
You give him a shy smile and say, "Thank you. For believing that I can get better."
He give you a smile and says, "You're welcome baby." And places a chaste kiss to your lips.
You pull away from the kiss and say, "Did anyone say anything about having someone stay with me?"
"Yeah they did." Was all he said.
He rubs the back of his neck nervously and continues, "I was thinking that I could stay with you, b-but that's only if you want me too. Maybe y-you would want Desiree to stay with you."
Letting out a small giggle, you tell him, "Spence I wouldn't want it any other way. You can stay with me. I think it'd be better if it were you."
He lets out a breath, that he probably didn't even realize he was holding in and says, "Alright, I'm gonna go tell Dr.Wilson that I'll be staying with you."
You nod as he stands up and walks out of the room.
Looking around the room, you see all the flowers and balloons from all the people who visited you and you can't help but smile.
I guess people did care about me after all. You say to yourself.
__
04/14/2018
Saturday
12:03pm
You were finally getting discharged from the hospital and Spencer was helping you get into your clothes, since you had bandages and stitches on your wrists, thighs and stomach.
Letting out a wince as the material of your sweats touch the stitches on your thighs, "Shit." You say underneath your breath.
"I'm sorry." Spencer says quietly.
He helps you put on your sweater, socks and shoes. And then you hear a knock on the door. "Come in." You and Spencer both say in unison.
You look over at the door and see Richardson and Wilson walk in. "Good too see you Y/N. Spencer." Richardson says with a nod.
"Alright, I've put down all the information of the therapist, you're going to be seeing, she's great. She actually works across the street from the hospital. All you have to do is give her a call and tell her who you are and she'll make an opening for you immediately." Wilson starts to explain to you.
"Ok, I just have one question." You say.
"What is it?" Wilson asks you.
"You guys aren't giving me any type of prescription right?"
"No, you should know that already." Wilson tells you.
"I know. I just wanted to make sure." You say.
"Ok then, you're free to go and we all want you get better and just know that we all believe you can get better." Richardson says as you sit down on the wheelchair.
"Who's we?" You ask as Spencer starts pushing you out of the room.
Once you're out of the room, you see all the nurses lined up, along with some of your patients, and many of the staff you've worked with these past few months.
You instantly start crying as you see all of them lined smiling at you and giving you sweet encourages.
"We believe in you Y/N."
"We love you."
You can't believe how much people cared for you and all along you thought that you didn't matter.
"Thank you." You say through your tears and you see Lisa at the end by the elevator and she gives you a big hug and whispers into your ear saying, "I know you can do this Y/N, we all do." And gives you a kiss on the cheek.
"Thank you Lisa." You say and Spencer pushes you into the elevator.
You wave at everyone before the doors close and say to yourself, "I can do this."
"Did you know about all of that?" You ask Spencer as you wipe away your tears.
"I did not." He says and you look up at him and see that he's trying his best not to smile.
"You did know." You say through a laugh.
"Yeah, Lisa told me. She said that all your friends had talked about it and made sure it was ok with Richardson and he agreed." He says while looking down at you.
"That's sweet of them." You tell him.
The elevator comes to a full stop on the first floor and Spencer pushes you out and makes his way out of the hospital towards the parking lot.
You both make it to his car and he helps you into the passenger side and he had already brought down your bags, so he quickly went back into the hospital to leave the wheelchair.
As you sat in the car, you grabbed your phone from your bag and see that you have messages from Desiree and Jen.
D- Hey Y/N, is it ok if I stop by in the morning? I got busy at work today. -11::56am
J- Y/N, can I stop by today?-11:57pm
Before you can respond to the messages, Spencer unlocks the car and gets in. "Ready?"
You give him a nod and he starts the car and drives away from the hospital.
Y- Yeah Des it's fine. Just text me when you'll be over.-12:26pm
Y- Jen can you stop by tomorrow morning? Des is gonna stop by too.-12:27pm
Their responses are immediate.
D- Ok, I'll probably be over around 9 before my shift starts.-12:28pm
J- Yeah that's better. What time is Des going?-12:28pm
Y- She said around 9. -12:29pm
J- I'll text her so we can get there at the same time. Love you. -12:30pm
Y- Ok. Love you too. -12:30pm
D- Is Spencer staying with you? -12:31pm
Y- Yes. -12:31pm
D- Aww that's so sweet. -12:32pm
Read.
"Are you hungry? We can stop by somewhere and get some food." Spencer asks you.
You put your phone back in your bag and look around to see if there's a place to stop by. "Yes. The food at the hospital isn't the best."
"What do you want to get?" Spencer asks as he stops at a red light.
"Mexican food." You say and point at the small little Mexican restaurant on the corner of the next street.
Spencer nods and drives over to the restaurant.
He pulls into the parking lot and parks close to the entrance and asks, "What are you gonna want?"
You grab your phone and look through the menu online and see that they have enchiladas.
Oh those look good.
"I want three red enchiladas and an horchata for the drink. Are you gonna get something?" You tell him and hand him your phone to look through the menu.
"Yeah I'm gonna get something too. I'll be right back." He tells you and gives you kiss and gets out of the car.
_
Spencer pulled into your apartment complex and parked the car in the visitors parking lot.
He got out of the car and helped you out and he wrapped his arm around your waist lightly to help you walk up to your apartment.
Once we got to the door, he pulled out the spare key from his pocket and you smiled as he opened the door because he kept the key.
"I'll be right back. I'm gonna bring your things and the food." He tells you as he places you on the couch and gives you a kiss on the cheek.
You nod and he walks out, closing the door.
Looking around your apartment, you took notice that somebody had cleaned it.
The last time you were here, there we plates on your coffee table, an empty bottle of tequila, your tray, a blanket on the floor and the rest you don't really remember.
You let a few tears fall at the thought of what happened and what would have happened if Spencer didn't show up.
You would have been dead.
Gone Forever.
You hear the door open and you quickly wipe your tears before Spencer sees you.
Hearing him walk around, he places the food on the counter and takes your bag into the bedroom.
"Do you want to eat on the couch or the table?" He asks as he walks out of your room.
"Couch."
He grabs the food and hands you one bag and a drink and he has his own bag and drink.
"What did you get?" You ask him as you open your box of food.
You watch him open his box and you see that he got rice, carne asada, beans and some jalapeños.
Basic Mexican Food.
He flashes you a smile and he starts to eat. You pick up a fork and start to eat the enchiladas.
"Can you hand me the remote?" You ask him.
He reached for the remote and hands it to you. Turning on the tv, you scroll through Netflix and put on AHS.
You had put Apocalypse.
Both you and Spencer ate in silence, with only the tv making sound.
As you ate, you start thinking of how you should tell Spencer about your past and why you had did what you did that night.
Just thinking about it, makes you want to cry, but you want him to know about it.
He needs to know.
He deserves it.
You put your now empty box of food on the side of you and finish the rest of your drink and hold it in your hands. Spencer had finished eating before you and was very interested on the episode we were watching.
"Spence?" You voice is barely above a whisper.
He hums in response and turns to look at you.
"Um- who cleaned up my apartment while I was in the hospital?" You say instead of saying what you really wanted to.
"Desiree and I. We came here the day after you had woken up and you were asleep mostly the whole day, so we decided to come over and clean."
"Thank you-." You stop yourself and then he looks into your eyes and you break.
"Spence, I'm so fucking sorry that you had to find me like that." You say and the tears start to fall. Spencer grabs the empty box and cup and places it on the table as he wraps his arms around you to hold you.
"Baby you don't have to talk about it yet." He says as he pulls you a bit closer to him.
"No Spence I want to tell you. You deserve to know the truth. I want you to know everything." You say through sobs.
"Are you sure you're ready?" He asks you with a soft voice.
You nod your head and the first thing that comes out of your mouth is-
"I lied."
_____
Author's Note <3
Sorry for the cliffhanger, but I'm already working on the next chapter. This is a filler chapter so it's all going to make sense in the end. This chapter is a little short, but I still was able to fit this in with the story, so if it doesn't make sense, it will in the next one, I promise. Thanks for reading and commenting. Also thank you for 13K reads.
I want to let you guys know about the family emergency I had a few days ago. My great grandfather passed away on Friday and I have been with my family these past few days. I'm only updating when I have time and feeling ok to post.
Thank You
-Destiny 🤍