(Okay, I know I said I only update on Fridays, but I couldn’t resist posting an update in honor of February 15, Fandomapocalypse Day! If you don’t know what Fandomapocalypse Day is, you write the word “Fandomapocalypse” on your left arm in green ink if you belong to any fandom, and if you see someone else with “Fandomapocalypse” on their arm, give them a hug, no matter what fandom they’re from. After all, all fandoms should be united for one day out of the year. (And if nothing else, you all get a free early update out of it, right?)
Happy Fandomapocalypse Day, guys!
And one more thing: I completely forgot to mention this earlier, but (sadly) I don’t own Ninjago. Just had to get that out of the way.)
You and Zaptrap have become good friends online. Sometimes, the thought of talking to him is the only thing that gets you through the day, especially when you have to talk to your ex or his new girlfriend, (girlfriend’s name). You try to avoid them, but it’s almost impossible because one or both of them are in all of your classes.
It’s even worse because your ex’s new girlfriend takes every opportunity to rub in the fact that she’s basically stolen your boyfriend. Your ex still says that he wants to be friends, but he never sticks up for you, even when it’s obvious that his new girlfriend is way out of line.
Right now, you’re in shop class. It used to be your favorite class, but now you can’t wait for it to be over. Your teacher has you work on projects in pairs, and you’re paired up with g/n.
You’re working on your half of the project when your phone vibrates—you have a message from Zaptrap! (You downloaded the Perfect Match app so you could talk to him with your phone.)
You make sure g/n isn’t looking, then carefully put your phone behind a stack of tools so she can’t see it.
Zaptrap: How’re you holding up?
Y/u: Not good. Trapped in class with my ex’s new girlfriend.
Zaptrap: Ouch. Need to hear a joke?
Y/u: Sure. Fire away.
Zaptrap: Why did the banana go to the hospital?
Y/u: He wasn’t peeling well. Why can’t you tell a funny joke while standing on ice?
Zaptrap: Because it might crack up. What nails do carpenters hate to hit?
Y/u: Fingernails. What two things can’t you have for breakfast?
Zaptrap: Lunch, dinner, and my friend’s cooking.
Y/u: That’s three things.
Zaptrap: You haven’t tasted my friend’s cooking. He could ruin breakfast cereal. I’m not even kidding!
Y/u: How do you ruin pouring cereal in a bowl and putting milk on top?
Zaptrap: I don’t know, but he does it!
You stop reading your phone as you realize that g/n is looking over your shoulder. As soon as she sees that you know she’s there, she smirks at you. “Begging my boyfriend to take you back?”
You work on typing out a reply to Zaptrap and answer, “Actually, I was just thinking of a joke.”
“Really?” she asks. “Let’s hear it. If it’s funny, maybe you can tell it to your boyfriend later—oh, wait, you don’t have one.”
You feel like crying, but you won’t give her the satisfaction. “Have you heard the joke about the butter?”
Zaptrap: Hey, you still there?
Y/u: Hang on a minute. Dealing with ex’s girlfriend.
G/n frowns and puzzles over the joke for a few minutes, while you send the joke to Zaptrap and he sends the right answer back. Finally, she pouts and says, “Alright, I give up.”
“I better not tell you, it might spread.”
G/n’s face turns an angry shade of red. You almost make a scathing comment, but you stop yourself. You won’t sink to her level.
“(Teacher’s name)!” G/n shouts. “Y/n has her phone out!”
Your teacher gets up from his desk and walks to your and g/n’s workbench. He pulls out a pad of detention slips, scribbles something on the top slip, then tears it off of the pad and hands it to g/n.
“Silence is golden,” he says sternly. Your teacher has one rule in his classroom: his students can do anything they like in class, as long as they’re quiet, get their work done, and clean up after themselves.
G/n can’t believe it. “But—” she protests. “But—”
He shakes his head. “No buts. Report to the detention room after school.” Then he turns around and heads back to his desk.
You smile down at your phone and send Zaptrap another joke:
Y/u: Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?
Zaptrap: A guy who’s never been hit with a dictionary.
Y/u: Nope. My ex’s girlfriend.