On my way to class, i got a few curious glances, which didn't surprise me, considering, its not very say you see a male in the outfit I'm wearing right now. Although, surprisingly, the attention doesn't make me cower away in embarrassment. I woke up this morning feeling confident, which isn't something that happens often.
But, when it does happen, i like to wear the clothing that I'm to nervous to wear normally, which includes my lovely collection of crop tops and other "girl clothing". Sometimes i like to wear things from the women's department because it makes me feel pretty. I also likes the way it feels.
My parents were always really supporting of me if i wanted to wear something that wasn't normal for a guy to wear. Surprisingly, my dad was the most encouraging one. Not that my mom wasn't encouraging, its just that, it took a little bit longer for her to get used to it.
My dad has always been my number one supporter when it comes to my life though, which I'm extremely happy for. Which is why, i thought of him and his support this morning as i put on one of my favorite outfits, which I'm now confidently strutting to class in.
Its pretty basic, but i like the way it feels on me. I also like the way it shows off my natural curves. I was born with a somewhat hourglass figure. I've always had a small waist, and wide hips. My mom says i get that from her, which doesn't surprise me, considering, my mom could be a model if she wanted to be.
"Woah there" are the first words Finn says as i take my seat next to him in the lecture hall.
"You like?" I ask, smiling brightly at him. I really hoped he liked it. Although i am feeling confident, it doesn't take much for that confidence to go away, so a single mean comment could easily leave me sad and insecure for the rest of the day.
"Like?" He asked with wide eyes, scanning my outfit for the fifth time, "I love it. Props to you for having the confidence to wear this because honestly, that takes guts. You look amazing in it too" he says, without a hint of dishonesty in his voice, which only feeds to my good mood.
"Thanks" i say with a wide smile, genuinely happy at his reaction.
"Alright class. This is class number five of Architecture Design History and Theory" My teacher, Mr Collins, says, facing the class, his eyes traveling across the students, and stopping on Finn fo a few seconds before continuing.
"I can't believe we've already survived five of his classes without passing out" Finn whispers from beside me.
"I know right." I reply, in the same hushed tone, keeping my eyes on the teacher, making sure he doesn't catch us talking.
I've never really been a rebellious kid. And I've never gotten in trouble with teachers or the school, and i didn't intend on starting to now.
"Today we will be having a pop quiz on the materials you have been taught so far, so clear your desks and take out a pencil." He says, picking up a stack of papers from his desk.
Groans are heard throughout the lecture hall, from students who obviously didn't study. I can hear Finn groan too, but i stay quiet. Silently thanking my dad for what he always taught me:
Even if there isn't a test or quiz coming up, study the material little by little. It will pay off in the long run.
I would be sure to mention how much his advice helped me the next time the called.
I watched as professor Collins passed around the papers to the awaiting students, who by the look on their faces, thought, or even knew, they were going to fail the first quiz of the year. A paper was placed in front of my, face down, and I immediately turned it over. It was only 15 questions.
I easily flew through the quiz, filling in the questions. I found that the essay questions were easier than the multiple choice. Thats always how it has been for me. I've never liked multiple choice for the sole reason that the multiple answers to choose from always messed up my train of thought and made me second guess myself.
I always take longer to answer those types of problems, but in the end, i managed to finish my test. I walked up to the front timidly, placing it on the dark oak wood of the teachers desk. He raised his eyebrows at me.
"That was awfully quick..." he said, trailing off.
"Teddy" i said, interning my name.
"Yes. That was awfully quick Teddy. Are you sure you don't want to take more time on the quiz?" He asked, to which i shook my head. Sure, i was the first one done, and i had completed it within 10 minutes, but i was satisfied with the answers i produced.
"No thank you sir" i replied. He spared me one last glance before sliding his paper to in front of him, and taking out a red pen, most likely to grade my quiz. I took his silence as my cue to walk away.
As i sat back down in my chair, i looked over at Finn who was already giving me a look that read, how-the-heck-are-you-already-done?. I chuckles to myself, turning my attention back towards my desk, fiddling with my nails.
It was a nervous habit that i had. Usually, when I'm alone, i suck my thumb when i feel the need to fidget with something, it calms me down. But when I'm in public, and I'm not able to suck my thumb, i always end up picking at my fingernails, or twiddling my thumbs.
Surprisingly though, for how much i pick at my nails, they still look clean and polished, as it i went to the nail salon. Speaking of which, I should go get a manicure sometime soon. Yes, i get a few curious glances, as always, when i go to the nail salon, but i don't usually pay attention to them because i like getting my nails cleaned and my cuticles removed.
I usually don't put polish on my nails, because it draws unwanted attention, but i have done it twice before, and if I'm being honest, i loved it. It was a lot like my girly clothing. It made me feel pretty.
I remember the first time i told my dad i wanted to get my nails done, the shock on his face was evident, but it went away quickly because the next thing i knew, he was calling and making me an appointment at the nail salon. See? Thats what I mean when i say he's always been very supportive of me.
I'm snapped out of my daze when a large hand slaps a post it note down onto my desk. I look up from where my thumbs are circling around each other, and watch as my professor retreats to his desk. I glance down at the stick note, reading it.
Stay after class. I would like to have a word. — professor Collins.
That's when the nerves start to kick in.
Questions and thoughts swarm my head and i find myself wondering what i did wrong. I've never been held back after class before, why now? What did i do? Why does he need to see me? I take deep breaths in, silently.
In through your nose. Out through your mouth.
My hands twitch, wanting to reach out and grab my bear from my book bag for comfort, but i stop myself, knowing i can't bring him out in front of 50 or more strangers, no matter how much i want to. Tears prick my eyes, but i hold them back, bot wanting to embarrass myself.
Soon enough, Mr Collins dismisses the class, and i stay sitting in my seat, watching as students pack up their bags and file out of the lecture hall.
"You coming?" Finn asks from beside me.
"Um. No actually. Sorry. Mr Collins wants to have a word with me after class" i say apologetically. He gives me a look of, what-in-the-world-did-you-do. Which happens to be the same question I've been asking myself. I give him one last sheepish grin, and a shrug of the shoulders.
"Alright. I'll see you when i see you" he says, smiling at me as he walks towards the exit. I nod at him in response. Once the last student is finally out of the room, i raise my eyes, looking at Mr Collins timidly.
"Mr Jacobs. Come here" he says, motioning me over to his desk. How does he know my name. Is my first thought. But then i realize he probably looked in the attendance list to mind my last name.
"Mr Jacobs" the professor repeats, and thats when i realize that i haven't moved from my seat. I quickly get up, hastily walking towards the front of the classroom.
"Yes Mr Collins? Did i do something wrong? I'm sorry! I didn't mean to if i did!" I rush, out of nerves, causing him to let out a chuckle.
"You did nothing wrong Mr Jacobs" He said, smiling at me.
"Call me Teddy please" i say, uncomfortable with being called Mr Jacobs so much. It makes me feel like my dad, since thats what his employees call him. "If you don't mind me asking, why am i here then?"
"To my surprise, you aced your quiz" he says, using one of his hands to rub the stubble on his chin.
"I-I did?" I ask. Part of me is surprised, because as much as i expected to get a good grade, i didn't expect to Ace it.
"Yes. You did" he confirms. "How?"
"U-Um." I stutter, not completely sure how to answer his question. "I-I studied?" I say, but it comes out as more of a question. He smirks at the nervousness in my tone.
"Why?" He asks
I look around the classroom, avoiding eye contact, "Well, uh— because i want to do well in your class?" Once again, my words come out as more of a question than a statement.
"Yes, but, i didn't announce a quiz before today"
"Its a trick my dad taught me. Study before the teacher even announces a quiz or test" i say, without any nerves this time. I was proud of my father. The man he is, the way he raised me, the way he treats everyone says a lot about him, and when it comes to him, I'm not nervous.
"He sounds like a very intelligent man" Mr Collins says.
"He is. He is he reason i decided to become an architect. Not that i don't like it, because i do, he was just my inspiration. He's an architect too. He has his own architecture company." I cut myself off when i realize I'm rambling. He tilts his head, a look of realization crossing his face.
"Whats your father's name?" He asks, with hope laced in his voice. I decide not to question it.
"Um. Marcus Jacobs" i reply. His face lights up, and a smile spreads across his face.
"And how is Marcus?" He asks.
"What?" I ask in response, confused on why Mr Collins is acting to odd about this.
"I went to high school with your father" he responds, clearing up some of my confusion, "We were in most of our classes together for junior and senior year. Funny guy. Really great guy." He has a fond look in his eyes as if he is reminiscing the past, which he sort of is.
"Oh wow. Thats surprising"
"Yeah and now I'm teaching his son" he says, with disbelief laced in his voice. "So how is Marcus?" He asks once again.
"He's good. For all i know. I video call them a few times a week and he seems happy and healthy" i say honestly.
"Thats good to hear. Say hi to him for me, will ya? Tell him that you've got Tony Collins as your teacher kiddo."
I nod my head in response. I doubt i will remember to say hi to him for my father, but i will mention that he's my teacher. Knowing my father, he would find that amusing, and would probably say something along the lines of: "It's a small world"
"Will do Mr Collins" i say.
"Alright Teddy. Thats all. You're free to leave. Have a good day." Mr Collins says with a smile on his face. I return the smile, shifting my backpack around on my shoulder, backing up towards the door.
"You too Mr Collins" is the last this i say before i turn on my heel and exit the room. I'm startled when Finn pops up out of no where. Normally i would scream, but it gets caught in my throat, and the noise i make sounds more like a dying frog.
"What did you guys talk about?" He asks, with excitement in his voice as we walk towards the exit of the school.
"I'll explain to you as we walk. Why were you waiting for me?" I ask in response.
"Cause you're my friend. Now tell me why he needed you." He whined impatiently. I laughed at the pout on his face before explaining everything as we walked.