Armena Riddle-Lestrange
Monday: May 24th, 2010
I sat at my desk, stabbing aggressively at my food. Pansy was going on and on about something, but I was too annoyed to listen or care.
It had been weeks since that day in the Ministry library. Weeks since Draco asked if he could get to know me. We still worked closely together on training, but now that he was in the swing of things, others came in to work with him. I felt frustrated and annoyed that I fell into his trap and let him ask me those questions.
I probably scared him off, if we are being bloody honest here.
"Are you even listening to me?" Pansy waved her hand in front of my face.
I shook my head and turned my attention to the dark haired girl in front of me. She looked visibly annoyed that I wasn't paying any attention to her. Very typical Pansy Parkinson behavior.
"I'm sorry?" I shook my head again, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. "What were you saying again?"
"I don't even know why I bother" she huffed, clearly frustrated with me.
"I'm just a little distracted" I mumbled.
"Why? What's wrong?" she smirked, clearly wanting to know what was going on.
"I don't know..." I bit my tongue, trying to hold back my emotions.
"Don't you dare try to avoid this, Lestrange," she narrowed her eyes at me. "You know I will get it out of you eventually..."
She was right, I knew couldn't hold back from Pansy. She would eventually torture it out of me.
"Fuck, fine! Draco told me about two weeks ago that he wanted to "get to know me"..." I threw my hands up in quotations, "and we haven't really talked since I mean other than the usual training and lessons but fuck. I hate this so fucking much and before you say anything I know— I know."
"I'm not going to tell you anything but holy fuck Armena! Why didn't you tell me this before?" her eyes were blown wide as she squirmed in her chair.
"Because I expected you to react a lot differently..." I tilted my head to one side as I watched Pansy have a fit.
She looked like a girl who just won the lottery. She was squeezing and muttering praises to herself over and over again.
"Are you alright?" I asked, concerned for my friend.
"Like I need to know all the dirty details! I know Draco Malfoy, I know you two didn't just chat about how he wants to get to know you."
"But we did just chat. There was nothing sexual, I mean other than the tension we both have. It was very tame, he was mature and calm about it" I couldn't help but let my lips pull up in a smile. "He wants to get to know me..."
"I'm about to fucking die, not literally— I feel fine" she glanced towards me, "I just wow, just fucking wow."
"I know but— fuck, now I feel like I'm in a rut."
She leaned back in Draco's chair, letting it twist a bit as she stared at me intently. She shoved a forkful of food into her mouth and narrowed her dark eyes at me. I knew the wheels were turning in her head and I was scared about what she was going to say.
"What kind of rut?" she asked, a smirk pulling up at her lips.
"I didn't know there were different kinds of ruts?" I leaned forward to take a bite of my lunch.
"Is it a sexual rut?" Pansy scooted forward so that she was leaning her elbows against my desk.
I gasped, looking around noticing that the office was mostly empty.
"Pansy—" I gave her a warning tone.
"Is it a sexual rut? Armena Riddle-Lestrange are you in a sexual rut?" Pansy shrieked.
"It's not sexual. More or less an emotional rut or romantic rut..." I muttered.
"That's basically the same thing as a sexual rut. I mean let's be honest, when was the last time you got laid?" She raised her right brow, smirking at me.
I had to think back on it, the last time that had any sort of mind blowing, bed rocking, earth shaking, throw your head back and scream sex was with Draco. The rest have been, well for better terms— vanilla.
It wasn't like I couldn't get laid, but it seemed that every time I got close to the act of shagging, Draco's head would pop into my mind. Sex became very clinical at one point. The guys would just fuck, two pumps and done. While I would just lay there and fake it until they finally came. Then I would send them on their merry way. It got to a point where I just stopped having sex all together. I found that toys did the job just fine and probably even better than most of the guys that were trying to date me.
"I can't fuck Draco" I whispered harshly, making sure even the walls in the empty office didn't hear.
"And why can't you?" Pansy raised her brows. "You fucked him all under our noses at Hogwarts and all over the school as well..."
I felt the crimson rise to my cheeks as I thought about Draco and I's exhibitionism at Hogwarts. We really did have quite the imagination from classroom tables, the restricted section, the pitch, the courtyard, in class, in his dorm, in my door, in the hall— fuck, you name it. There was not a spot at that school where Draco and I didn't touch.
"Pansy, I am really not in the mood to find out if you are going to die or if I am going to die—"
"Oh if I die because Draco stuck his dick inside of you then I wouldn't care. I would die a happy woman!" She leaned back, smirking at me.
"You are sick, Parkinson" I narrowed my eyes.
"Well, if you aren't going to fuck Draco. You could always take Atticus Diggory up on his offer. He's always been more than interested in you."
Atticus Diggory was a ladies man, a playboy and a big fucking pain in my arse.
He knew he was the hottest and it didn't help that "Witches Daily" named him the Hottest Wizard Bachelor for four years now. Before him it was Draco, who was just as equally as much of a playboy back in the days as Atticus was now. Atticus Diggory was attractive, dirty blonde hair and cinnamon colored eyes. I have worked with him for a few years now and each time he has made every single effort to try and get into my panties. From what I've learned about Atticus is that he went to school at Ilvermorny, where he excelled in all things. His father then moved back here after he graduated to be closer to his brother, whose son was killed by the hands of my father. Atticus soon followed and now he is here. I think he resents Potter a bit, they were both in the same Auror training class but Potter was just better.
"I refuse— and by refuse I mean I would rather go on a date with a Dementor than with him" I huffed, popping a chip into my mouth.
"Are we talking dementors?" Potter chirped.
My eyes darted to the door where Potter and Draco just entered. I watched as Potter came up behind Pansy and wrapped his arm around her and gave her a big kiss. Pansy blushed a shade of petal pink and swooned at her husband's ways.
I bit my lip nervously looking down at my food, trying to avoid eye contact with the one person that would have made me react that way and tenfold.
"Oh yeah, let's all just use my desk. I don't need it or anything" Draco huffed.
I couldn't help but smirk, biting my lip in the process to pull back the corners of my mouth.
"Well, I was sitting here first. You can always share a seat with Armena, Draco" Pansy cooed. "I'm sure she wouldn't mind."
I raised my head and glared at Pansy with annoyance. My eyes rapidly darting between the three people in front of me. Draco rubbed the back of his neck, his cheeks flushing slightly pink by the embarrassment we were both experiencing.
"Draco, love?" Pansy cooed, "You have a big birthday coming up, don't you?"
Draco let out a groan as he rubbed his hands over his face aggressively.
"You know I hate birthdays, Pans" he moaned.
"Still, I think that we should celebrate. Better yet, leave it up to me. We can do something in our apartment" she smirked, motioning to Potter and I.
I let out a groan as I tossed another chip in my mouth. I needed to find a new place to live. It was starting to get embarrassing that I was basically in a thruple with Pansy and Potter, minus the sex and the cuddling. That would just be fucking disturbing, sex with Pansy and Potter. I shook my head trying to rid the thoughts out.
"What were you two ladies chatting about before we so rudely interrupted?" Potter asked, perching himself on Draco's desk.
"We were just talking about Armena's dating life. It seems our dear old friend is in a rut. I was telling her that she should take up Diggory on his offer since he's so keen on Armena."
"Pansy, please!" I snapped, my voice raising slightly.
"Diggory is not a bad bloke, Armena" Potter shrugged.
"You cannot be serious" I hissed, shoving away my food.
I widened my eyes at the dark haired boy in front of me. Shocked that he was entertaining this idea. I folded my arms across my chest, letting out an aggressive sigh. I was acting like a child but I didn't want to even entertain the idea of going out with Atticus.
"Why are you so against it? You just told me you haven't gotten laid in months. You know there's probably cobwebs down there" Pansy smirked, her eyes going from myself to Draco.
I knew exactly what she was up to.
"Pansy!" I snapped, "please stop talking, now!"
"What I am just saying what everyone else is thinking" she smirked, "right Draco?"
I nearly choked, hearing his name come out of her mouth. The pale haired boy beside me shifted his eyes over to me. Ours met instantly, his grey eyes now silver with clear lust behind them.
Was he thinking about us? I felt my core clench by the thought of it.
"Draco?" Pansy repeated again, I could tell she was having a fit inside.
"Well, from where I am standing— it seems that Armena doesn't want to settle with someone who doesn't meet her..." his eyes flickered down my body and then back up, "... needs."
Holy fucking shit.
I couldn't stop looking at Draco. I felt my breath hitch in my chest as the images from ten years ago played like a movie in my thoughts. The passion and the roughness of the pure pleasure that we would experience. I could feel my panties dampening by the thought, but I couldn't have that. No— there would be absolutely no way that I could ever do that with Draco again. I shook my head, trying to reorient myself in the conversation.
"Well, Armena— maybe you should find someone to help fix those needs of yours" Pansy smirked. "I think that D—"
I cut her off as quickly as I could. I knew exactly what she was doing, it was typically Pansy Parkinson behavior.
"No, no, no and nope!" I shrieked, I stood up abruptly, my chair hitting the back wall. "I am not going to talk about my sex life... with any of you."
I grabbed my folder and wand off the desk, brushing past Draco on my way out.
"It is my concern when we live together!" Pansy yelled after me.
"I'm moving out! This is my final notice!" I yelled over my shoulder.
I could hear Draco snicker behind me, as he followed me out and down the hall to the training room. He didn't bother trying to catch up with me, he knew I was frustrated and slightly embarrassed. I knew Pansy was trying to get a reaction out of either Draco or I and she succeeded. Even though Pansy was my best friend, she was still a royal bitch when it came down to it.
The worst part of this was the fact that Pansy was right. I wanted to date someone and I was in a sexual rut but the one person that I wanted to be with, I simply couldn't. Unless Pansy truly had a death wish, then in that case it was survival of the fittest.
I pushed through the barrier to the training room, not even bothering to change into my training clothes. Instead, I conjured myself a chair and plopped my body into it, my face resting into the palms of my hands. I knew if Draco and I dueled each other right now, I would lose my control. I would hurt him and I didn't want to do that, I couldn't do that.
Fuck my life.
The room was quiet, I could feel Draco's presence in the room but he was keeping his distance.At one point, I thought he had left but then he spoke.
"Pansy was just trying to get a rise out of you."
"No fucking shit" I snapped, glancing up to Draco.
He had conjured almost an identical chair and was sitting across from me. His legs wide with his elbows resting on his knees. He was twisting his rings around on his finger, while carefully watching me.
"If I tell you something about myself, may I ask you a question in return?" His voice was low, it seemed to vibrate through me.
"Excuse me?" I furrowed my brows.
Draco had two weeks to ask me all sorts of questions. Two whole weeks that were way more appropriate than right now. Yet, now he was finding this to be the right time to get to know me.
"You told me that you would allow me to ask you only very limited questions, so I have been really thinking about what would be the best one to ask you next" his lips pulled up into a smirk.
"You had all these weeks to ask me anything and you are choosing now?" My voice was barely a whisper.
"Yes, I know the timing is off but I did mean it when I said I wanted to get to know you" he took his lip between his teeth. "You want to know why I hate birthdays so much?"
I already knew the answer, that night at Slughorn's Christmas party Draco had told me his reason for resenting his birthday and his father. But there was no way that I could tell him I already knew the answer, so instead and just leaned back and nodded my head.
"When I turned sixteen, my father wrote to me and told me that I had to take the Dark Mark before I returned to Hogwarts for my sixth year. I resented him that day and it put a very dark cloud on my birthday. Well, ever since then, I have refused to celebrate it. I would much rather wallow in my own self pity. It was miserable getting that mark. It felt like my flesh was burning off my body. I wanted to die..."
I sat there and just stared at him, not sure on how to react. I had already knew about this story. I knew exactly what it felt like to get the dark mark. I closed my eyes remembering that day when Fenrir Greyback held me down on my dining room table while my mother carved into my skin. Draco watching everything unfold while his father held his head, forcing him to watch.
"I'm surprised you didn't run away after hearing I was a Death Eater" he leaned back and smirked.
"It takes alot to scare me and you being a Death Eater is not one of them" I smirked back at him.
I could feel my forearm, where my ink rested begin to twitch and I wondered if he felt it too. If he did, he wasn't showing it because his grey eyes just held mine.
"Pansy knows how I feel, yet she chose to bring it up today for a reason. She likes to see other's reactions" he sighed. "Now can I ask you a question?"
"Ask away" I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear, as I watched him debate on what to ask me.
"I have noticed something about you," his eyes darted to my right hand. "You and Pansy share the same scars and before today I didn't put two and two together, but I am starting to."
I felt my breath hitch in my chest, I knew exactly what he was referring to and I was scared to admit it. I tucked my hand under my arm, trying to hide the curved white lines that signified the Unforgivable Vow.
"There is no point in trying to hide it from me, Aremna. I have already seen it, I know those marks mean that you and Pansy have taken an Unbreakable Vow. I assume it was together, am I correct?"
I don't know what came over me but I nodded my head, answering his question.
"Why?" he asked, tilting his head to the side slightly.
To protect you because I loved you— love you.
"It a long story" I sighed.
"I have time" he leaned back, smirking at me.
His grey eyes held mine intently. It was obvious to anyone that he genuinely did care about what I was about to tell him and that honestly made it worse. I took a deep breath and let it out though my nose.
"We did it when we were younger. I did it in order to protect someone that I cared about very much and her promise was to make sure that she always had the person's best interests at heart" I felt my throat close by the mention of this.
Pansy and I have joked about the Vow in a sick and twisted way before, but we have never downright discussed what happened that night at Malfoy Manor with Narcissa. This was the first time in ten years that I was even bringing it up and out of all people to bring it up to, I was discussing it with the person who was the sole reason we made the Unbreakable Vow in the first place.
"Is that why you are so afraid to open up to people?"
I wanted to throw up.
Not that I didn't want to have this conversation with Draco, but the thought that he was genuinely curious as to why I made an Unbreakable Vow with Pansy made me sick to my stomach. I think some part of me wanted Draco to be the same arsehole that he was when I first met him. The same one that would bully Potter and his golden trio. The dark and twisted Draco.
But he wasn't that Draco anymore, he was a mature young adult who had seen the ugly side of war. He was considerate, tenderhearted, compassionate, patient and wanted to get to know me.
"I guess it is, yeah" I found myself saying.
"Do you think Pansy still has this person's best interest at heart?" he leaned forward.
"I would like to think so, yes. I think if she didn't, then one of us would meet our end."
We were silent for a few moments, the only sounds in the room were our breathing. If this was old Armena and Draco, we would have been completely lost in each other by now. We would be devouring each other like it was our last days on earth, but this wasn't the old Armena and Draco.
No, it was the new Armena and Draco.
"I think we can wrap up today early. If Potter asks just blame it on me" Draco sighed, standing up off his chair.
I gazed up at him, my mouth slightly agape as he held out his hand for me. I placed my hand in his, feeling the sparks ignite from our touch. It was like a thousand different fireworks had gone off in the room. I wondered if he felt the same thing. He pulled me up so that I was now face to face with him, our hands still interlocked. I watched as his eyes darted down to my lips and then back up.
"I really do enjoy our time together. Armena, I know you—" he paused, trying to think on his words. "I can't deny the feeling that I have when I am with you. I have never been more intrigued with a human being more in my entire life."
I felt my heart begin to flutter in my chest.
"I would like for you to give me a chance and let me show you who I really am outside of all of this" he glanced around the room.
Did Draco just ask me out?
I wanted to be selfish at this moment. I wanted him to take me out on a proper date. I wanted to say screw Pansy's life and plant my lips on top of his— but I couldn't.
Fuck, I couldn't be selfish.
"Draco—" I breathed.
"I understand, you don't need to say it. But just know I am a patient man, Armena. I will wait until you are ready to let someone in but promise me that I will be first in line when that happens."
And with that, he was gone.
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Hello all! Again thank you so much for continuing to read! I have some chapters written but I am unsure on the direction so I might hold off on posting them. Most likely the latest I'll post is Sunday so just wanted to give everyone a heads up!
Also, this is Atticus Diggory (he is a relative of Cedric Diggory and will play a role in this story ;) )