it has been five days since that incident with the detective and i've finally gotten over my fever a day ago.
there are a couple things i find odd, and there are many things my mind has been occupied with as i had lots of time to do nothing but think, being alone in bed most of the days.
jungkook is never here. i'm sick and he even told me he would take care of me, but he doesn't get back until one or two in the morning.
usually by then i'm either out cold, or one of those nights i caught him coming back while i was in the kitchen getting water.
i think it was around... two-thirty?
another two things i have found seemingly odd are that one; he never even suspected or asked about why i asked him if he remembered me that day we ran into each other on the street. and two being that... i never gave him my phone number so i don't get how he got it in the first place.
also, ever since jungkook has been staying with me.. those strange calls have stopped. i haven't gotten one since. now don't you think that is a little odd?
i've been trying to play detective... and what if it was really him. i mean, look at it this way, ever since he has been staying here... he really can't make a call because i would hear him, but at the same time.. couldn't he make a call when he is out for almost all day long?
it was a little confusing, but i know that it has to be jungkook or my uncle.. or one of his men.
there couldn't be anyone else that would make sense.. right? unless that stalker from the grocery store was making those calls, but i don't know.
regardless of my suspicions and about everything else, jungkook and i have gotten closer and i think it is to a point where i'm actually real comfortable with him.
he made me use the money my uncle gave me to pay off my rent and to be honest... it felt so good once i did it.
it is currently five in the afternoon and ever since i woke up at ten this morning and took a shower, i've been laying in my room on my bed, scrolling through stuff on my laptop.
i was mostly looking for a better job and now that i'm searching online, i have finally realized i'm even dumber than i thought. why did i go out to find a job about a week ago without searching the internet first? it would have saved me time, energy, and frustration.. but of course i never use my brain so i never really thought to do something that smart.
i swear, no joking, i am probably going to end up getting kidnapped and all that because i'm so slow when it comes to actually using my brain.
but all the suspicions and everything aside and bringing everything back to the man... i think there is something i can't keep running from.. and that is... i think i'm starting to have feelings for jungkook.
i mean, honestly, who wouldn't? he is sweet, charming and handsome, can cook and take care of you, and he is a very comfortable person to be around.
sometimes he makes me suspicious, but there is just something about him that makes him so much different from everyone else.
letting out a sigh, my stomach started growling, my hand coming up to close my laptop and place it beside me on the bed.
i was only wearing a striped tank top with nothing underneath and some shorts because i didn't think jungkook would be back until later tonight.
slowly, i got up off the bed and made my way to the kitchen to get something to eat.
combing a hand through my hair, i stepped inside the kitchen, heading for the fridge to see if there was any leftovers from what jungkook made me the night before. he prepares food for me before he leaves, something that i also am very fond of... something that makes my feelings more real than i would have imagined.
opening the right door, i looked inside, the light illuminating the dark room as it has been storming all day so there was no light in the sky.
it wasn't completely dark like it would be at night, but i'm sure you can understand what i mean. everyone has had to experience a stormy day once in their life right? unless they were just born today.
to my luck, there was a tupperware bowl of some left over food inside. today he didn't make me anything but he at least said goodbye to me and to have a good day.
i grabbed it, pulling out a drawer and grabbing out a fork before taking the lid of the bowl off and putting the tupperware into the microwave.
it was glass tupperware so i wasn't worried about it melting in the heat.
setting it in for a minute, i stood there and waited, spinning the back of the fork handle against the granite countertop.
i looked outside the window as rain hit against that glass, nothing new, and then looked back down at the microwave to see it have about five seconds left.
canceling it, i opened the door and pulled out the food, hissing as the glass burnt my finger and setting the dish down on the counter quickly.
leaning against the kitchen counter, i ran my fork through the food, stirring it around and watching the steam as it floated through the air from the heat in the food.
i was waiting for it to cool down and once it was i started eating, making it halfway through the door to the apartment opened and jungkook walked on in.
i had forgot that i wasn't wearing much and looked up from my food, my eyes coming in contact with his as he kicked off his shoes.
he is back so early.
my eyes grazed over his body, his clothes and hair wet and i assume it is from the rain.
he looks back at me, walking closer to me.
"you didn't bring an umbrella with you?" i asked, watching the man walking towards me, but he doesn't say anything.
as he came up to me, i backed up, more and more as he continued to follow me. my back running into the counter behind me, his hands pressing down onto the surface, trapping me.
"wh- what is up with you?" i looked up into his eyes, the man staying silent, gazing deep inside my very own orbs.
my brows furrowed as the both of us stayed like that for a couple more seconds, his hand coming up and grasping my chin.
"why aren't you wearing much?" he spoke, making me realize what i was wearing in his company.
as i tried to go to my room to change, he wrapped his other hand around my waist and pulled me closer to his body, my heart pounding heavily.
"you're not going anywhere," he breathed against my lips, tempting me whilst pulling my face closer to his very own.
this is crazy.. he is crazy..
even the smallest actions from this man was enough to stir up my emotions, my hormones, and just about every single nerve in my body.
my heart was already going crazy and my mind was already imagining things that one shouldn't necessarily think about another.
"j- jungkook.. this-" he cut me off, pressing his lips against mine.
as if i lost control of myself, i responded almost immediately, my hands coming up and grabbing onto the collar of his shirt to pull him closer.
his lips were so soft and felt like heaven against my own, my legs already growing weak for this man.
placing both his hands on my waist, he lifted me up on the counter without breaking contact with my skin, running his lips down my neck.
throwing my head back, i let out deep breaths of air, fully immersed in this deep feeling of desire and the sensations his lips gave.
i wrapped my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck before he then picked me up again and this time carried me to my bedroom.
placing me back down on the mattress he pulled his shirt over his head and crawled over top of my body, holding eye contact.
"you're mine tonight.." something about those words sent goosebumps across my skin as he slid one of his hands under the fabric of my shirt and his lips found mine once again, his other hand softly grazing up my inner thigh.
throwing my head back as he went about my body, i was completely wrapped in his sensual touches and the arousal that devoured me like the rain in a storm.
i didn't even bother to stop him, his hands, his lips, or any of his actions.. letting the man take all that he wanted.
•.¸¸.•*'¨'* •.¸¸.•*'¨'*•.¸¸.•*'¨'*
waking up to knocking on the door, i already saw jungkook getting up from the bed beside me whilst pulling on his sweatpants.
as he got up and stepped out of the room i quickly grabbed his t-shirt off the floor and put it on over my head, the material big enough to cover my body down to my mid thigh.
not really thinking much about it, i headed out of the room to see who was at the door, seeing jungkook looking right at whomever it was.
walking up behind jungkook i asked him who it was, but as i looked up to meet the one at the door, my heart started beating rapidly in my chest and my eyes widened.
as the man's eyes came in contact with me, he barged his way inside the apartment and i backed up as he grabbed my wrist and tried to pull me to him, "what are you doing here with this man?" my uncle shouted, jungkook grabbing his arm in attempt to pull him away from me, but the older man elbowed jungkook in the face.
placing a hand over his nose and mouth, jungkook glared at the man who had his hands on me.
"let go of me!" i shouted, my uncle disregarding the fact that there was someone else in the room with us and pushing me up against the wall.
as my back harshly made contact with the hard surface behind me i let out a groan, his hands placing themselves around my throat.
"she told you to get off of her," jungkook's voice ran deep, and before i had any time to process what was happening, my uncle's grip around my neck loosened and the look on his face had told me it all.
jungkook grabbed the man's shoulder and pulled him from me, stabbing him over and over again and getting on top of the man as he had fallen to the ground. watching it all unfold before my eyes, tears were streaming down my face, my whole body trembling as everything started coming back to me.
my eyes made contact with the knife in jungkook's hand, the red handle.. the black blade as he stabbed my uncle over and over again, "you don't ever touch her like that you scum!" he yelled, the veins in his neck and forehead bulging out in rage as he continued to strike the man down although he was already so obviously dead.
blood covered jungkook's face as he seemingly went completely insane in front of me, but everything had went into slow motion in that moment and i was finally realizing everything without having to be told any of it.
the moments i had slowly come to believe were just my imagination were very much real, the knife he held was the one i had in my kitchen cabinet a little over a year ago.. and the worst of it all was that.. i had slept with the very man who murdered my boyfriend.
how do i know he killed him? well now that i am first hand witnessing that all go down... the way he is so viciously stabbing the older man in the chest over and over again was more than enough to tell me that he was the one to stab xavier in the chest over thirty times...
my legs collapsed under me in which i had fallen to my knees, the shirt i was wearing of jungkook's stained in my uncle's very own blood, all the things jungkook had said running through my mind as i placed my hands over my head and sobbed on the ground in front of my uncle laying in a pool of his own blood.. all because of jungkook.
"if he even tried to show up at your door and lay a hand on you i will kill him."
"i'm not even surprised. that guy had lots of money."
"i can't come to show respect for someone's passing?"
"it is hard to grasp the death of someone close to you,"
"but it is reality and you need to learn to face it and overcome your sadness."
"you shouldn't be out here alone like this, especially after that young girl had gotten murdered a week or so ago.."
"just because i am an idol doesn't mean i wasn't like you before i got into my career."
as my palms had fallen against the floor, i could feel the blood under them, the all too strong and vivid smell of metal, signifying that it was my uncle's own bodily fluid.
i felt as though i was going to throw up, as though i was about to lose my mind, and this time i really had wished i was a part of a nightmare.. that the man i started to feel something for wasn't a cold blooded killer like i had thought he was in the past but was forced into believing that he wasn't because it was all an "illusion".
i didn't want to look up and see the horror that was clearly before me.. i don't want to ever have to look up and see that man.. the man who murdered my boyfriend, and even though i hate the man to death.. the man who killed my uncle right in front of me.
letting out the air in my lungs felt harder than i would have ever imagined it to.. it felt as though there was a heavy weight on my chest trying to stop me.
the air came out in shaky breaths, my whole body trembling as everything around the both of jungkook and i went silent. i could now feel his piercing gaze upon me..
and suddenly, a laughter erupted from the man, causing my body to tremble in fear for what was to come, trembling in the undying terror that this man held over me.
"oh darling.. don't be scared.." he let out, the tone of his voice showing just all amused he was, knowing i was scared, "how easily you were fooled by me," he let out some more of his laughter, the laughter that before this incident i would have loved to hear if it wasn't so.. tainted and clearly laced in nothing but pure evil.
i could hear him shuffling around, but only kept my eyes upon the ground, my hair falling over my face to provide as somewhat of a shield from the sight i so clearly didn't want to have to ever see.
and at this very moment i felt as though i was that little girl again.. the one who was afraid to move in her own skin.. the one who was terrified and had watched a man murder someone right before her very two eyes.
this very moment i felt like a complete idiot.. i felt weak and vulnerable..
i could now see his feet in front of my eyes, the man bending down and reaching out, grabbing on to my chin and harshly pulling it up to where i couldn't do anything but face what i didn't want to one bit.
this whole thing was sending flashbacks after flashbacks, tears rolling down my face, being reminded of the horrible past i had to encounter and the horrible things i just wish i never had to experience.. especially as a child.
instead of my uncle being the one i feared, it was now jungkook, his dark orbs glaring straight into mine, making me fear for my life as amusement danced around in his gaze.
"don't be scared, darling.." his voice rang out, his bloody hand gripping my chin tightly, the bodily liquid now smeared across my skin.
"that man was never a good man and you surely know that, hm? he wanted to hurt you, hm? why are you so scared now, hm?" the tone of his voice was somehow calming by terrified me more than anything. the way he spoke his words was so hypnotic but yet so manipulative...
my lips were trembling, my body shaking as the man before me was no longer someone i felt comfortable with but instead.. dreaded with my life and feared with my soul.
"oh my darling.." he brought up his blood covered knife, holding it so i could see, "all along i had you for a fool didn't i? you really thought it was all just your imagination and i got what i wanted after all, but not completely."
his voice got deeper, "i need your help now," he started, "we need to get rid of the body and-"
"no!" i shouted, "i will not help you!"
i don't know what got into me, but i believe it was mostly because of the anger i felt, knowing deep down this man was the cause for xavier's death.
"i will never help a murderer like you!"
suddenly, the one thing he had told me before was invaild, his hand removing itself from my chin in order to strike me in the face.
"i told you darling," he let out a laugh, my head shot to the side from his force, my hair covering my tear soaked face, "that if you told anyone about me, about what had happened between us... that there would be a punishment for your acts."
he stood up, "you promised me," he laughed some more, "you promised to keep your mouth shut but yet.. your promise meant nothing after all, did it?"
i couldn't do anything, not move, not speak, not even think.. all i could do was stay there on the ground and listen to the man as he paced back in forth in front of me.. in my very own apartment as my uncle's dead body was left on the floor.
"i put my trust in you, and you destroyed it. you played me for a fool at one point, but i keep promises unlike you," he started, "you see, i told you there was going to be a consequence for your actions, and that is why xavier is dead, that is why i had no choice but to hit you."
i shook my head, tears flowing like an endless river as i tried to tell myself it would all be okay if i did all i could and ran out to get help.
there are people out there, in their apartments, all i have to do is get out there and shout for help...
"you did have a choice.. you never had to take an innocent life for my disobedience..." i muttered, low but not low enough for him not to be able to hear.
he let out a laugh in disbelief and as i watched him from in between my hair in front of my face, i waited, seeing his feet turn and face away from me.
i took in a deep breath.
now is my chance.. my chance to get away from this man.
taking the situation to my own advantage, i got up as quick as i could and rushed to the door, opening it and stepping outside, knowing the man was right behind me.
"he-" before i could even finish what i was trying so desperately to shout out, his hands wrapped around my body, one of them over my mouth as i struggled against him, jungkook pulling me back into the apartment and closing the door, locking it.
pushing me up against the wall, he growled, glaring deep into my eyes.
"don't ever try that again." he demanded in a harsh tone, his breath hitting my face, causing me to try and make as much distance between us as i could but it was hard when he was pressing me up against the wall, his body up against mine.
"p- please..." i started to beg, having no other option.
his expression never faltered and neither did his hold on me.
"if you try and run from me again.. xavier won't be the only one i will have to do something to to make you understand, you got that?"
i knew exactly what he meant by those words.. exactly who he would go after next...
nodding, i had no choice but to listen to him now, having no choice because i knew i wasn't strong enough to outpower him or that i had the right mind to outsmart him either.. not right now at least.
"good girl," he grinned, "now be a doll and help me clean up this mess, why don't you?"
doll...
that nickname had sent even more fear throughout my body, making me realize something i probably should have by now... he was the man on the phone too.. just like i had suspected him to be at one point but shrugged off as i thought he was a decent man.. but of course, i was wrong.
as he let go of me, i stayed in my spot, watching him as he clicked his tongue on the roof of his mouth, spinning the bloody knife around in his hand as he seemed to be thinking, "now.. how are we going to get rid of this man?"
my heart was pounding, looking down at the body on the ground, just seeing the dead man laying there in a pool of his own blood was enough to make me want to throw up.
"ah ha! i know exactly what we need," he raised his knife up in the air a bit.
his words made me look up at him, not wanting to move, being reminded of last night and how good it felt to be with him in that moment.. how i let him take all of me without even knowing that he was the one to take my boyfriend's life.
and that is when my phone started ringing from the bedroom, causing the both of jungkook and i to look over in the direction of the device, but then he turned to look back at me.
"stay there, you got that?" at his words i nodded my head, swallowing the lump in my throat as i knew i couldn't do anything now, the thought of jungkook murdering kirsten the biggest thing to keep me from running..
as jungkook had come back from the bedroom with my phone in his hand he had answered the call, giving it to me whilst showing me who it was on the screen; detective masons.
he put the phone on speaker and mouthed the words "act normal" as he held it out for me to speak.
"hello?" i asked, trying not to give anything away with my voice although my body was still trembling.
"hello y/n, how are you?" the man on the other end spoke, part of me wanting to be honest and tell him that i wasn't okay.
"i'm okay, how about you?"
"i'm doing just fine," he started, "but i'm calling you because we have just found something more about xavier's death."
i took in a deep breath of air and held it, my heart pounding.
"oh? what is it?"
"we had checked every gas station we could in the city and at one of them the cashier had said that they saw xavier that night," he began, "but they had also seen another man come up to him before he got in his car and they seemed to have a heated conversation before xavier drove off and the other man followed him in his car."
i was making dead eye contact with jungkook the whole time the man was talking, "did they.. see the man's face?"
"no, they didn't, but the car he was driving was a rental and we are on our way to figure out who had rented a car recently."
i noticed how jungkook's body had tensed up upon the detective's words, part of me calming down a bit at the information that i had just received.
"oh, we are here now, i have to go," the man said.
"okay, thank you for letting me know.. and please, i hope you figure out whoever did this and catch them.." i responded, jungkook quickly ending the call before the detective could say any more.
he looked beyond angry with me, glaring deep into my eyes.
and before i could protest against his actions, jungkook threw my phone on the floor, the phone breaking apart and scattering across the floor.
my whole body flinched at his actions and then it hit me. he just enabled me from being able to use my phone.. so what if he does something to kirsten because of my actions and i won't be able to warn her...
"darling..." jungkook spoke lowly, "you can never escape me no matter how hard you try, and i want you to know that, alright?"