Ezra
Me
Charity case
Less fortunate.
I knew it was stupid to let Chloe's words get to me. I knew she was just an insecure person jealous of the attention that Ezra gave to me. But I couldn't control the way it took over all of my thoughts.
I had just woken up hours after what happened, I couldn't sleep without those thoughts disturbing my bed rest. What exactly did Ezra think of me, was I like a charity case like she mentioned.
I grew restless over time, tossing and turning unable to find the sleep I so desperately needed. A knock came on my door and I looked up to find Naomi peeping into my room.
"Are you fine?" She asked me and I nodded in response, sitting up to see her well. "Do you need anything?"
"A clipper will do, I'm going to get rid of my hair." I told her with a smile. She flipped my elbow slightly knowing that I cherished my hair more than anything. But I knew that sooner or later, I'd have to chop them all off.
"Harper is downstairs talking to Ezra, he's been outside for a while," she passed my phone to me and I found the missed calls notifications on my display screen. "Do you want him to leave?"
I thought about it. It wasn't his fault that Chloe pushed me to the ground and pulled my hair out of my scalp, she was her own person.
"I'm going to talk to him," I answered her and she nodded in agreement. Naomi helped me up and sat me on the stool. She combed my hair through and hid her worry and concern when a part of it came out through the comb.
I was losing a lot of hair lately.
She packed it into a low bun and put some lipgloss on my chapped lips. I wondered what she was doing but I didn't complain either ways. She took me out of the apartment and the breeze rushed through and gave me tingles on my skin.
Ezra released his folded arms and left the car which he leaned on to approach me. Naomi waved me goodbye and Harper also nodded and patted my back before leaving us. My friends were everything to me.
Ezra doesn't say anything, he picked up my hands and assessed my entire body, scanning it for any kind of injury, and feeling my temperature on impulse.
"Raine..." he drawled, unsure of what to say. "Are you hurt anywhere, we can go to the hospital?" He asked me, opening the car door for me.
"I'm okay, Ezra, just a scratch on my hand." I answered him waving it off as I went into the car.
As I walked into his apartment, the memories of when he spoke harshly about his father popped in my head randomly. He helped me sit on the stool and he stood opposite the counter, facing me again with folded arms.
"Did you eat? I can order in." He asked me.
"I already did," I answered him and he nodded putting his hands behind his back.
He opened his refrigerator and brought out a cold juice carton. He handed me one as well as a straw. I realized that just as much as I had questions I wanted to ask but couldn't ask, Ezra seemed to be fighting his hesitation to say the things he wanted to say as well.
He led me to his balcony so that we could take in fresh air and watch the cars pass by on the road. It was a nice view from his apartment as I could drown in the beauty of the night sky.
"I figured you didn't bring me all the way to watch me drink from a juice box?" I asked, taking a glance at him.
"No Raine, I brought you here to talk," he answered and doesn't say anything again.
"If by chance, you think you what Chloe did is your fault, it is absolutely not your fault," I assured him and he shook his head without looking at me.
"My Dad," he sighed as he mentioned that. I was surprised to hear him initiate a conversation about a topic he didn't want to hear of.
"Ezra, you really don't have to tell me if you aren't ready," I tried to convince him.
"Trust me, I want to tell someone," he replied hastily as he grabbed my hands and held them. "I want to tell you."
I nodded in agreement watching him jump on the railing so that his back was faced to the outside and his face to me.
"My Dad served in the military as an outstanding officer, boasting impeccable records, successful deployments, and a reputation untarnished by scandals-a sentiment widely held by others." He explained and I recalled the numerous medals awarded in his honor as displayed in his house back at Midland.
"But he came back home an entirely different person. Whenever my mom argued with him, he would resort to violence. She asked for a divorce but he tore the papers up every time she took it to him. Trying to intervene only led to him hitting me as well, locking me in a room while my mom cried. I was only thirteen, Raine."
"My God," I mumbled, watching Ezra's eyes darken in remembrance.
"When my mom gave birth to Sia, he lied about changing for better. He promised Sia as a baby, heaven on earth. He was ready to stop hitting my mom because of her baby. But for me, there was no stopping to it, he took out all of his frustrations on me."
And I wondered how painful that'd have been for him as a child.
"One day, I decided to learn to fight back. By the time that I was ready to fight back, I had seen countless wrestling matches, I had practiced while he wasn't home. I waited and waited but he never came back."
"And you fight to protect your mom and yourself from him?" I asked him and he nodded.
"And to protect Sia from the harsh truth that her father was a monster."
I didn't know what to think, I didn't know what to do, I only looked at how Ezra had his trauma hidden greatly behind his smile and his jokes, his scars beneath his clothing.
"So I plant my father's face on my opponent's in the ring and hit them as much as I'd hit him if he were to ever come back. That was the reason why I started fighting, but now, I do it because I just cannot stop."
He seemed saddened as he said his last statement. I pulled closer to him and pulled him into a hug. He held me dearly, patting my head continuously and pulling me closer like I could fill the void in his heart. Like I could pull him out of his mess.
My heart thumped loudly and I couldn't tell if it was from the story Ezra shared about his past or the new feeling that his company brought me that I couldn't possibly imagine admitting to.
Because I understood what that heartbeat was, I understood what it could cost him and so I let it remain abstract and nothing more.
Ezra didn't stop looking deeply at me, like he could see through my soul. He held me like I was what he needed the most at this time. I wondered if a charity case or a less fortunate individual was really what he needed.
He searched my eyes like I was in a distant place and he was trying to find me.
"The first time that I met you, I wished that you bashed my whole car if it meant spending more time with you at that automobile shop." He said to me.
Tears pricked my eyeball as I processed his words. He leaned into me as he wiped the tears off from my cheeks. He cupped my face and came closer until the only thing separating us was a breath. And as he planted a soft kiss on my lips, holding my back to prevent my numb legs from failing, I realized that I had never felt so much peace and so much chaos at the same time.
Nov 20th