It took several hours until we arrived at Sam's estate and the moon was high in the sky. We tied the carriage on some trees in the woods and made our way to the enclosure. There were guards swarming and guarding the fence with guns in their hands.
''I know a way in, but we're going to have to climb two fences'' I whispered. She nodded and I led her to the unkempt and grassy part of the enclosure. We wobbled over the fence using a large nearby rock to give us a boost. We sloppily climbed over the fence and into the intimate area of Selena's memorial. There were new flowers laid out on her tombstone and I thought it was odd being Sam was miles away on a medical venture for sick kids.
''So, this is Selena?'' said Teal as she brushed her fingers across the tombstone.
''Pretty much'' I responded.
''How are gonna climb this wooden fence? Only one of us can go'' said Teal.
''Well I'm not leaving you here. This was a bad idea anyway. Let's head back'' I responded to her as I walked back towards the enclosure.
Teal grabbed my arm to stop me and said, ''No! No. We did not come all this way for nothing. Rain River Brandy, you are climbing over that fence. I'll be here waiting when you get back'' she ordered. Tears streamed down my face and we embraced in a tight hug. I kissed her on the cheek before she bent down on her knees for me to climb over the fence.
I climbed onto her back and lifted myself over the long fence. I tumbled to the ground nearly breaking my ankle, but I managed to walk away with a small scratch. I lifted myself up and ran to a nearby window in the kitchen of the big castle. I used all my strength and adrenaline to open the window and I lifted it enough to climb through it. The sharp wood scratched against the palms of my hands as I struggled to fit through the window. It was pitch black inside the castle and I couldn't see anything. My only option was to use my hands as a guide to support myself through the window.
I was midway through the window when it sealed shut against my back. I struggled to free myself, but I was locked in and I heard footsteps coming towards me outside. ''Who
s there?'' yelled one of the guards as I felt his presence approaching.
Panic set into my soul and tears began to stream down my face. I saw my future with Sam disappear and imagined my body hanging from tree. I realized how much I wanted a future with him, even if he was a killer. He was the kindest soul and he made me feel alive. He took me into his home and promised to protect me, and only asking for my hand in return. My negative thoughts about him subsided and I felt silly as my body hung out the window. I wriggled and whimpered continuously trying to free myself, but it was of no use.
Suddenly, there was a flicker of light in the kitchen turned and I looked up to see Grant's face with a lamp in hand. He was wearing loose ragged pajamas and his curly hair was unkempt. He was wearing dirty shoes as if he had just finished yard work. ''Need a hand?'' he asked with a smirk on his face.
''Yes. Please, hurry!'' I loudly whispered to him. He ran over to me to lift the sealed window crushed against my back and I fell backwards out the window landing on my backside onto the grassy surface. I grabbed my neck and realized the pink diamond Sam had given me was gone and I began to panic, and my tears began to thicken as I saw the shadows of the guards coming closer.
''My pink diamond necklace! It's gone,'' I cried.
''Don't worry about it, just leave it,'' said Grant.
''Sam gave it to me,'' I said as I searched the ground frantically and blindfully with my hands.
''Shit! Rain! I'll find it, just grab my arms. Hurry up!'' Grant yelled quietly, as he extended his arms out of the window. I grabbed ahold of his arms tightly and he grabbed me under my armpits and quickly whisked me through the window of the castle. He picked me up as if I was as light as a feather and laid me on the floor gently.
''Stay down'' Grant demanded, and I obeyed his order.
''Is there a problem Grant?'' asked one of the guards from the window.
''Nope. Just grabbing some fresh air'' he said.
The guard rolled his eyes and cleared his throat. ''No more disturbances, boy! Go back to bed!'' the guard demanded.
''Sure'' Grant responded as he closed the window and let breath of air escape from his mouth. Grant quickly turned off the lights and lifted me to my feet. He had a firm and caring grip around my waist and gazed into my eyes. I hugged him tightly to display my affection for saving my life.
"Are you okay? What are you doing here anyways?" he asked me.
"I wanted to know more about Selena " I responded. I shook my head in disappointment of myself and explained, "I realized...I was wrong to infer and not trust him. All he wants to do is love me...I'm falling in love with him and I'm going to accept his proposal". Grant let go of his grip around my waist and let of breath of air escape his mouth once more in frustration.
"Well, you shouldn't have risked your life for nothing. I want to show you something anyways." he said. He grabbed my hand and led me to a door in the kitchen that led to the basement. The basement was dusty and filled with cobwebs. There were old books laid on a mattress in the center of the basement. There was a craving in a wall that read Grant and I assumed this had to be his room. The room was dark, but I was still able to see from the natural light of the moon from a nearby window.
"Is this where you sleep?" I asked him.
"No" he responded swiftly. I did not question him any further. I assumed he probably was too embarrassed of his living conditions or was hiding something.
He opened the door to the cellar and said, "This is Sam's memorial of Selena". Grant lit a candle on the window seal and the cellar filled with light. The room was filled with paintings of a Hispanic women in her twenties.
There were candles and flowers everywhere. It was like an obsessive shrine. A shiver ran down my back. He must have really loved her, although I did find it really odd. I looked around the room in horror but I tried to keep an open mind. There had to be reasonable explanation.
I walked over to a small painting about the size of my hand and studied it. Selena had long dark hair and strong facial features. She was beautiful and had a devious look in her eyes.
I picked it up in my hand and said, "Can I keep it?" I asked.
"I don't know. Sam may notice it is gone," he replied.
"I need to keep it," I begged. ''It's so small he won't even miss it,'' I pleaded.
Grant hesitated for a few moments but was shortly interrupted by a loud shattering scream.
''Teal!'' I shouted as I recognized the scream.
''She came along with me but stayed outside,'' I slipped the small picture into my bosom and I quickly ran upstairs towards the kitchen to open the window. Grant grabbed my arms before I could attempt to open the window and confined me to the floor. I relentlessly tried to escape his grasp, but he consoled me in his arms firmly and sheer panic attacked my heart.
''Let me go! They will hurt her! Let me go!'' I cried out.
''Shhhhh'' Grant silenced me and kissed me on the cheek. His lips were warm. and his body temperature was comforting. ''Everything will be okay. Prince Sam is not an evil man and he will ensure everything will be okay,'' he said, as he held me tightly. I quickly escaped his grasp and walked on my knees towards the window. I bent down to peak out of the window and saw Teal fighting and screaming as multiple guards tried to detain her. She was a fighter and I knew she would not give up. Her body and hands flung wildly in the air as she resisted them until one guard slashed her across the back with whip and she fell to her knees crying. I let a small scream escape my mouth as I sympathized with her pain and watch helplessly.
Two guards pushed her body forward to the ground and tied her hands behind her back. The back of her shirt was covered in blood and she cried silently with her face in the ground. The guards lifted her up from the ground and dragged her away beyond my view and my mind went wild with possibilities.
''Rain'' Grant said. I ignored him as my eyes swelled with tears. He grabbed my shoulders and forced me to look at him.
''Rain. Look at me. I must get you home before sunrise or you'll be in no better position than her'' he said.
''But we did this together. I can't let her take the fall for this.You said Sam wasn't an evil man'' I replied.
''..But Sam's not here right now. Those guards are gonna escort your friend back to where ever she came from and God knows what else they will do along the way,'' he said. I looked down to the ground but Grant grabbed my face with both of his hands and demanded my attention. He looked deeply in my eyes and said ''You can save your friend later. But you have to save yourself first. You can't save a drowning person, if you can't swim.''
He was right and I knew I had to save myself for the both of us. But deep down I wanted to save myself for me. ''Okay,'' I whispered, and he grabbed my hand and led me outside to the back of the castle until we made our way safely out the enclosure. I did not see Teal anywhere in sight during our quest from the castle.
''Where's your carriage?'' Grant asked.
''Over here'' I replied as I led him towards the wooded area where we tied the horses and carriage to the trees. The horses were resting on the ground and Grant quickly untied and readied them as I sat in the driver's seat.
''What are you doing?'' he asked me.
''You're not coming'' I replied.
''Please, Rain. I have to make sure you get back safely,'' he pleaded as he gazed me in my eyes.
''You can't save a drowning person, if you can't swim yourself. Save yourself Grant,'' I responded as I took the whip and hit one of the horses before Grant could respond. The horses took off running rolling the carriage away quickly from the castle. I could hear Grant's desperate cries for me to turn around, but I didn't look back and kept forward back towards the plantation. I needed to save myself.
By the Grace of God, I arrived back at the plantation as the sky started to brighten from the morning sun. My adrenaline distracted my wounded heart as I quickly locked the carriage and horses back into the barn and slipped my father's map back onto his desk. I locked myself in the attic and sulked by the window as I awaited to start my house chores. My guilt fought my tired eyes but eventually they won the battle and I drifted off to sleep.
I was awoken by the sound of loud shouting and hard knocking at my door. ''Everybody wake the hell up! You think you can disobey me! Get your asses down to the yard now!'' I heard my father roar who seemed to be on a rampage. I hadn't heard him get that angry since my mother died.
''Rain! Rain! You must come downstairs, now!'' yelled a young women's voice. I opened my door to see my fellow house worker named Lasette standing at my door. Lasette was a fair-skinned petite woman in her early twenties with short brown hair that she wore in two braids. Her face was dressed in fear and her brown cotton dress was ragged and torn. Before I could process my thoughts, Lasette grabbed my hand and forcefully led me outside towards the cabins.
I prayed and prayed the entire way that Teal was not the cause of my father's tirade but my intuition told me otherwise and my eyes began to swell with water. My father's voice grew louder and colder as we walked towards the group of coloreds who surrounded him. I gasped in horror as my vison came into focus and I saw a fair-skinned girl hanging from a pole with her long dark hair blowing in the wind. I ran towards the crowd of coloreds and pushed my way to the front of my group.
Teal's entire body was secured tightly to the pole with a thicke rope. My father was shouting and screaming as he slashed her continuously with rage. He was unshaven, unkempt, and wore loose fitted breeches. Teal screamed in agony and her face and body was covered in blood. I saw her beauty wither away, and I couldn't stand it anymore and I shouted ''No! Stop!'' in my hopeless defense to save her.
I ran to the pole and covered my body over her legs and used my hands as far as I could reach over the top of her body and held on tightly. Teal looked down at me and whispered in a raspy voice, ''Don't! Don't do this. Save yourself, and then you can save me'' she said as tears prickled down her face and onto mine. However, I still used my body as a shield to protect her and I could feel the deashing energy in the atmosphere.
''I'll teach you lesson too! Just when I thought... You would be an obedient daughter of mine!'' my father yelled. He slashed me across my back and my legs. I felt liquid ooze out of my skin and I withered in pain as I contained my scream refusing to give him any satisfaction of my pain.
''You want to take her punishment. Fine, and you can sleep outside tonight as well. I really hope your Prince can save you from this heeding.'' my father said as he threw a letter on the ground by my feet. I glanced down at it and it was from Sam and issued to me. I looked around the surrounding group of my fellow coloreds one last time before I closed my eyes and braced myself for the pain as I held tightly onto Teal's body.
'' You deserve to die for what you have done. You're the devil's child,'' he yelled at the top of his lungs. ''You ruined my life!'' It was all true. A terrible accident that happened years ago and haunted me for years until I finally managed to move on. I did ruin his life and I had wanted to die for a while, and almost succeeded with my wishes. The daunting reemergence of the sedated memories fulfilled my memory and awakened the pain of what I had done. I suppressed my tears and clung tightly to Teal and surrendered to the rath of my father.
My father slashed me repeatedly until I fell onto ground and felt my head grow light. I felt pain all over the back of my body and the sound of the earth grew quieter. ''Untie her! I think they've had enough'' I heard my father say. I felt Teals body fall onto my back and everything turned dark after that.
I dreamed of dream that swiftly turn into a factual nightmare. The same dream replayed in my head over and over again, like an imprisonment in hell. A never-ending loop that equated to the pain of the scars that oozed blood and poison from my body. Bed-ridden and broken for days, there was no other choice but to succumb to my fears. I tried to avoid sleep for as long as I could until I my fatigue forced my eyes shut, and I met my maker relentlessly every frightening somber.
I avoided and pushed away the memories for so many years, until I was finally confronted with the past of my mother's death on the edge of my own. It was the accidental death of my mother that changed my life forever that happened four years ago. I had just turned sixteen and Master Brandy, who I loved and acknowledged as a father had planned something special for me. He decided it was time I learned how to properly use a fire-arm to protect myself, now that I was a woman. Daddy, Mama, Belle and I were traveling by foot from the estate to a hidden lake in the woods to hunt a deer for dinner.
We had walked as a family through the woods for hours laughing, talking and enjoying the mild October air. The trees were at the peak of Fall and were arrays of pink, orange, yellow, and green. It was beautiful and my favorite time of year. Belle and I bickered most of the time, while Mama and Daddy walked arm in arm infatuated with each arm. Mamas dark, shiny, and bold head reflected against the sun. Her dark skin glowed and her fancy green gown dragged against the dusty ground. My father rubbed his hand against the back of her smooth neck comforting her gently. My mother had the most beautiful heart shaped face, natural red lips, and dark eyes. Her smile never left her face that day and she was gleaming in happiness. She couldn't stop gushing about how I was a woman, now.
We finally arrived by the spot at the lake several hours later where deer roamed free and wild. Mama and Belle had wondered off to collect flowers and herbs for medicinal uses, while Daddy and I hunted for deer.
''There! You, see it,'' he whispered as he pointed to the brown spotted figure a few feet away. He gently positioned my hands on the musket and backed a few inches away from me and whispered ''When I say shoot, pull the trigger.'' He said whispered. I nodded nervously and prepared myself for the kill. I wasn't to fond of learning how to shoot a musket, but I knew I had no choice. Even back then Daddy had a temper, and he was no one I wanted to defy.
''Shoot,'' he whispered. I pulled the trigger and the force of the gun sent me flying back hitting the ground on my rear end. ''Damn it!'' yelled my father, as we watched the deer run off deep into the woods and into the hands of safety.
''Sorry,'' I apologized feeling disappointed in myself. My father quickly grabbed my hand, helped me to my feet and dusted the stray grass and leaves from my brown gown and bodice.
''It's okay. You'll do better next time,'' he said as he pressed my head against his fleece shirt that smelled faintly of must. I smiled and smothered myself in his love, when we were suddenly interrupted by a death scream that made crickets and birds cease singing. Recognized the scream of Belle, I took off running as fast as I could towards the scream with my father following closely behind.
I finally spotted Belle sitting on the ground holding the bloody head of my mother. Tears streaming down her face and blood dripping down her hands. ''Help me, help me,'' she screamed. ''She's not dead. We must get her to a doctor, before it's too late.'' Mama's eyes were open and dazed. She pointed up to the sky smiling, confused, and demented.
The world spun around me as I came to the enviable conclusion. The bullet that had spared the life of an innocent deer but had plans to take another.
I helplessly fell to my knees, closed my eyes and screamed to the top of my lungs. I didn't know what quite else to do. It was fight, flight, or freeze, and I chose neither. We were miles from Doctor Coleson's estate and there was no logical way to carry my mother for miles without enhancing her injuries.
''Just shut the hell up!'' my father yelled, and I instantly stopped screaming. He was mad, and I was to blame for it. ''Just go see if you can find travelers with horses and carriages,'' he ordered.
I stood up and hesitated to defy his orders that ideologically would not work ''I'm black. Anit nobody gonna help a nigger in the woods like me. They'll think I'm a runaway.''
He shoved me to the side and reprimanded, ''Just help your sister and I'll find someone!'' Daddy returned with horses and a carriage several minutes later, pink eyed and grief stricken. He hopped off the horse and wept over Mama who was still alert and breathing. He gathered his composure and Belle and Daddy began to lift mama into the carriage. Whereas, I was too shocked to move or talk.
''Well, don't just stand there, help,'' Belle demanded.
''No! No! You have done enough for one day,'' my father protested.
''You told me to pull the trigger,'' I argued as tears streamed down my face and I began to whimper. They hastily ignored me, and Daddy swooped mama into carriage with his arms. I gathered my own composure and made my way to the entrance of the carriage while dreading the ride to Doctor Coleson's estate. However, my father blocked my entrance and said, ''I think you'd better walked home.'' His voice cracked, and his tears moistened the dry earth.
''But I don't know my way back and I'll get lost,'' I said feeling scared and helpless.
''I think you'd better walk,'' he said a little more loudly and authoritative pointing his finger in the opposite direction. I didn't fight it and began the walk home on a hopeless, random trail, and only hoped it would lead me there. The walk home was colder than coming and I felt quite sick. Not from my body, but from the disgust in my soul, and I vomited relentlessly. I couldn't get the gruesome thought out of my head. I surprisingly found my way home and dragged myself all the way up to the attic.
I remember Mama, Daddy, and Belle did not return home for days. I thought about traveling to Doctor Coleson's estate myself, but it was too dangerous, and I doubted I would be greeted by me angry and irrational father. I didn't know whether my mother was alive or dead and the thought drove me insane. I hid in my attic for days not eating, sleeping, or washing. No one knew I was there, and I preferred it that way. I hid my presence and concealed myself until the door of my attic opened one morning. I was awake, stinking, and hungry.
''Wash up,'' Belle said. Her blonde hair gracefully cascaded over her face and she was wearing black. Her face was grief stricken and she had been crying. ''Mamas home. She coherent, but she won't be for long. She has the mentality of a five year old, so if you would like to say your goodbyes, before-'' She closed her eyes and chocked back the tears that were already flying down my face. She abruptly turned and slammed the door behind her.
I did not bother to clean myself up or do my raggedy smelling hair that been in the same braid for days. I couldn't risk not having the chance to say goodbye to my mother. I ran downstairs to my parent's room ignoring the nasty looks and glares from the house-workers who disapproved at my appearance. I busted the door open and saw Mama laying on bed wrapped in covers, and a bandage on her head. Doctor Colson was checking her pause when he glanced up at me and shook his head grey head. He walked over to me and raised his grey and wolf-like eye brawls and took his glasses off.
''She has one hour at the greatest,'' he said. He placed one finger on my back and said, ''Sorry, I've done all I could do,'' and walked out rubbing his eyes. I ran over to the bed and grabbed Mama's hand and she squeezed. I smiled and she peered into my eyes and caressed my face.
''Have you seen my mommy?'' she asked.
I was so caught off guard by the question that emotion showed on my face.
''Is something wrong? I want my mommy!'' said Mama.
''You are my mama and I loved you,'' I replied, and she giggled.
''You sure are funny, Mam. I hope I am as beautiful as you when I grow up,'' said Mama.
''I am you, now just go to sleep,'' I said with tears in my eyes.
''Well, I am very tired,'' she said yawning. She smiled closed her eyes and she never opened them again.
Then I woke up. I woke up screaming from the same dream every night. Aunt Karen being relentlessly patient soothing me back to sleep to the same nightmare over and over again.
After days of falling in and out of consciousness I was finally strong enough to stay awake long enough to greet Aunt Karen while she tended to my wounds. The dreams had dissipated and I realized I was not on my death-bed and I was not going to die. The sweet smell of honey and coconut aroused my nose. Her large body hovered over me and her sweaty and dingy white bodice brushed against my skin. During my days of rest, I had much time to think and heal. I thought about Sam, and if he would return to me. It did not seem likely. I thought about freedom and all my possible choices. I had much to think about and too much to decide upon.
''Good afternoon'' she said as she noticed I was awake.
''I was asleep for that long?'' I asked.
''Yes. You took quite a beating. Brave, but incredibly stupid'' she replied.
''I've got to check on Teal. It's all my fault. We did it together'' I said as I attempted to get up. Aunt Karen forced my body back down against the wooden bed.
''You and Teal did what!?!'' she responded and placed both hands in the air and shook her head.
'' I don't want to hear it.....The midwifes say you've got a nasty concussion. You need to focus on resting and healing. Teal is fine'' she replied.
''Letter. Does anyone have the letter from Sam?'' I asked.
''I do'' Aunt Karen replied as she wobbled over to the white piece of paper on the table and handed too me.
I quickly ripped the seal and read the letter.
Dear Blue Eyes,
I haven't stopped thinking about you, ever since I left on my query. Our destiny is evitable because I know you feel the same. I'm madly insane about you and your blue eyes. I haven't known you long, but the feeling in my heart is not wrong. Write me back to say you feel the same or save me the treachery with your silence. I need you...I need to love you...I love you...
With All the Love in Me,
Prince Samuel West.
I quickly sprung up from the bed while Aunt Karen wasn't watching and walked towards the table and grabbed some coal from the fireplace along the way. I grunted placed both hands on the table as I tried to maintain my balance. Aunt Karen returned her attention to me and gave me a disapproving glare. She walked over to me and helped me sit down on a nearby unsteady stool.
''I told you rest'' Aunt Karen said.
''I must reply to Sam and accept his proposal. I can get all of us out of this nightmare'' I said.
Aunt Karen let a breath of air escape her mouth and said, ''Well at least let me help you''. I handed her the coal and paper and she began wording my acceptance.
Dear Sam,
Bare no treachery because I haven't stopped thinking about you either, and I long for your presence. I need you, now and I am in love with you. It is evitable that we shall end up together. Terrible things have happened, and I need your rescue. My friends and family have been tortured for too long and I ask to bring them along to our new life. The tears from my heart are scolding the imprints of this letter. The answer is yes, and I am yours forever. I shall await your presence and your love. Come to me quickly and give me your love.
With All My Love,
Rain Brady
Aunt Karen sealed the letter and snuck it out to the outpost a few minutes later. I only had an appetite for fluids and grew tired shortly after she returned. The hard and wooden bed was more uncomfortable than my old mattress in my room, and I had trouble staying asleep all night. Aunt Karen slept on the floor and made sure my ever need was catered all night long. Her kindness made me thankful for her presence and miss my mother. I had to rescue them all. I was marrying Sam whether he was killer or not and as long as I could love him....I would accept the consequences.