Happy Monday everyone. Hope you had a lovely weekend.
_
Hermione covered her mouth seconds after calling out for Draco.
Someone had to have heard her.
No, she told herself, not necessarily. Draco always speaks candidly here-which means there must be some kind of a sound barrier.
That doesn't mean that carries over to you screaming your head off, she chastised herself.
For a moment she stood staring at the door waiting for someone to come barging in and demand to know what all the ruckus was about.
She felt like she could hear her own hair growing she was listening so intently.
A minute passed, and then two...and then her situation began to close in around her.
He's not dead.
He can't be dead.
She wiped at the dampness on her cheeks.
He is not allowed to be dead.
As Hermione paced the room she convinced herself of it over and over.
Her legs feet got tired from the pacing and she sat down holding her knees to her chest.
A flicker of something...and then nothing.
Was it Draco through the bind? Or was it just wishful thinking.
As soon as it had come it had gone away, like something surfacing for the barest of moment before dipping back into a vast ocean of nothing.
"Draco..." she closed her eyes and leaned her head against her knees.
The clock chimed.
How long had it been?
It felt like she was always waiting.
Waiting for Draco.
Waiting to be tortured.
Waiting to be rescued.
An image of Ron popped into her head.
"I don't want think of him now," she muttered to herself.
What would he think of you knowing you've developed feelings for a Malfoy?
I don't have feelings for him, Hermione shot back almost as a gut reflex.
"Oh really," she answered herself out loud. "That's why you were shouting at the ceiling for him to come back to you." Her voice was venomous and judgmental even to her own ears.
Hermione let out a growl of frustration and lashed out with the wand which was still clutched tightly in her hand.
The pillow by her bed exploded in massive a puff of white sending feathers dancing through the air like little snowflakes in a blizzard.
"Dammit," she felt her eyes stinging again and hated herself for it.
She loved Ron.
But she had never felt this way about Ron.
It was like her whole world revolved around whether or not Draco made it home alive.
That's because you have feelings for him.
"No I don't" she said blowing off a feather that had landed on the tip of her nose as if almost in spite of her and her words.
"I do not have feelings for Draco Malfoy," she reiterated.
Silence greeted her as an answer.
The silence rejected her words and she felt that sick feeling in her stomach.
She cared.
Did caring about whether Draco lived or died mean more than just that?
Hermione crossed her arms over her chest and looked in the mirror. Little white feathers had alighted all in her hair making it, from a distance, look almost like she had been caught out in the snow.
Talk it out, she ordered herself.
Whenever her thoughts were in chaos that's what she did. Arrange things in nice little neat lines until they made sense.
She had done that about Draco once before...but that seemed like ages ago now. So much had changed....
It's only that he is your only link to the real world, she told her reflection, trying to will herself to believe it.
Her own eyes told her the truth.
There was something more.
"I don't want this..." she shook her head and little feathers flickered off her and fell slowly to the floor.
She didn't want to have feelings for Draco.
She didn't even want to admit to herself that she had feelings for him.
But you do have feelings for him...and...its better to admit it, then you can deal with it and go from there.
"Fine, I admit it," she said out loud. A tear rolled down her cheek. "But it doesn't matter because he doesn't-"
A small thump at the windowsill startled Hermione stopping her mid sentence.
Curiosity and the need for a distraction from her own thoughts had her across the room in second unlatching the window and opening it. There was an old leather volume just sitting on the ledge.
Hermione picked it up and brought it inside turning it over so that she could read the cover.
"Doors and their various uses," she read aloud. "Well that sounds...rather dull actually. What on earth is this doing here?" she frowned.
A feather from her hair dropped on the book and she brushed it aside and went back over to the mirror trying to pull each one out. There were at least a dozen if not more snagged and hiding in the nest of her curly hair.
She caught her own gaze in the mirror and her hands froze as she truly took in her image for the first time in a long time.
She had been avoiding the mirror.
last time she had looked she had been desperate, hollow and thin.
Now...her skin had regained some of its luster.
Even if you did have feelings for him, he would never return them, she told herself.
You're a mudblood he's a pureblood and despite everything he's done for you, that hasn't changed.
She thought of the kiss she had given him after being inside his mind.
Remembered him pulling back, yelling at her.
She looked away angrily from her own reflection and lashed out again with the wand. A second pillow fell prey to her attack exploding in a white flurry that danced around the room.
"Arrrgh!" she let out a cry of frustration. "I HATE THIS! I HATE ALL OF IT! I AM DONE WITH THIS BULLSHIT!"
A loud thump behind her followed a groan of pain.
Hermione leapt behind the bed reflexively ducking out of sight as little white feathers floated through the air.
"Hermione?" It was Draco's voice.
Relief flooded her system.
Alive.
He was alive.
Hermione popped up to see Draco waver on his feet. He was looking at the room and she realized how ridiculous it must look feathers everywhere.
"What the hell happened in here?" he asked. "Are you alright?"
"I'm fine," she said and ran over to him.
He was alive.
He had come back.
That was all that mattered.
I'm so glad you're alive, she thought the words she didn't dare speak out loud.
She threw her arms around him.
Draco cried out in pain and dropped to his knees, taking her with him.
"You're hurt!" Hermione pulled back and now that the feathers had settled she could see the burns on his arm and legs on the one side of his body, his Blond hair was matted on the side and back with blood.
oh my God...
So much blood....
"Yes...well that happens when people try to kill you," he said and leaned back letting himself slide down onto the floor.
"I need to help you," Hermione faltered, feeling helpless. "Tell me what to do. Where are your potions?"
She felt frantic, she had just gotten him back, she was not about to loose him again.
A strange look passed over Draco's face and he smiled softly.
Hermione felt that look down to her bones.
"Thanks for caring," he said softly.
His words lanced through her like a knife and she felt all the emotions that had been warring inside her break open again. Her eyes started to fill, wanting to spill over and she ordered herself not to cry. Not now, not like this in front of him.
Draco blinked, his eyes going in and out of focus. She could see him straining to stay conscious then his eyes darted up to her hair.
Draco reached up with the hand that wasn't covered in blood and black and scabs, and plucked a feather from off her shoulder.
"Really Granger, what did my pillows ever do to you?"
"I..." she pursed her lips at him and then she realized he was trying to make light of the situation.
Draco never made light of the situation that was the kind of thing Fred or George would do, not Draco Malfoy.
He is doing it to try and make you feel better...
Her heart squeezed.
"Nothing," she said then raised the wand in her hand giving it a quick flick. The feathers rushed back together stitching themselves up inside the pillows.
She felt a tugging in her hair.
"Ouch."
"Hold on a second," said Draco.
He reached up gently into her hair and pulled out a feather and brought it down between them pressed delicately in between his thumb and forefinger.
Their eyes met and locked.
"There," he said letting it go.
He smiled up at her and Hermione looked down at his beautiful clear eyes.
She didn't flinch or pull away when Draco touched her hair gently smoothing it out. Instead of fear, or worry, warmth crept through her at his touch.
He's so...wonderful, she thought. After all this and hurt as he is...he's still here with me...comforting me.
Why does he have to be like that? She found herself thinking. If he was cold or cruel or distant it would be so much easier to separate herself from him.
His touch was so gentle, and he was looking at her like he was memorizing her face.
Like she had saved him instead of the reverse.
Maybe he has real feelings for you too...You already know he cares...
Don't be stupid, she scolded herself.
He seemed to sense the turmoil in her and pulled his hand back from her hair.
"There is a book by the window," said Draco clearing his throat and Hermione realized just how long the silence had stretched between them while she thought.
"Yes," answered Hermione.
"Can you tuck it away please?"
"Of course," said Hermione. She got up and went over the book. "Where do you want it?"
"Underneath my nightstand should be fine," said Draco and she saw him crunch his eyes tightly together in pain.
"What do you need it for anyways?" asked Hermione.
"I want to learn a new piece of magic," he answered not looking over at her.
"For doors?" she asked raising an eyebrow.
"Yes for doors," said Draco he wheezed and Hermione realized she still hadn't done anything to help him.
"You know," he said. "For a fellow bibliophile you sure are judgmental."
Hermione shook her head.
"Where are your potions," she insisted. "I need to help you."
The door handle jostled.
Draco shot Hermione a look.
For a moment she was torn between listening to reason and what his eyes were telling her, and the need to be by his side.
"Please," Draco managed.
Hermione obeyed and darted over to the chains he had left her with-the ones he had trusted her with in case anyone came into the room while he was away. Looping them around her ankles she tucked the wand safely beneath her on the pallet.
She had barely managed to hide it before Narcissa Malfoy burst in.
-
And that is where I leave you for this chapter. I hope you enjoyed it. If you did please leave some love. Cheers.