back to our pov:
i walk back in my bedroom, which at this point is me and Shorter's bedroom. He's still asleep on the couch but i woke up and decided to move. getting under the covers and trying to fall asleep without him was hard. i found myself silently crying "skipper.." i cried out softy.
soft arms grasp around my waste, normally they're a crushing kind but this time his hug is full of sadness. "it wasn't your fault he died." Shorter's head rests against my back. "i could've saved him! but i didn't!" i cried out. "he was so scared when he was shot. his face was full of fear! a-and i just stood there watching it happen!" as i told shorter more tears gushed down my face. "i'm so sorry sunflower you shouldn't have had to go through that." his voice was full of pity "ME! i didn't go through nearly as much as skipper went through!" i turn around and start crying into his chest. normally i don't think shorter would've been so affected by his death but my words made him realize that, that little ball of joy was gone, never would he step foot on earth again. hugging me tighter, shorter starts sobbing on my shoulder. him and skipper were friends. he was just a kid he should've never been in a gang or done any of this he should've never been killed.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
'his soul may rest easy'
thats what the gravestone said, all of the people closest to him showed up to the boys funeral. all crying because he wasn't their. always the person to make jokes at the worst time yet still manage to cheer people up. always they're for people when he was needed most. now his soul was free from all the pain and misery that came with the small boys life.
Ash was their, many things went through the lynx's eyes 'why didn't i yell louder when i knew he was going into a trap' or ' i knew this would happen eventually!' ' god i'm so stupid i let this boy join a fucking gang!' all of which were lies, lies Ash was feeding himself. people were their, people he couldn't show emotion around. biting his bottom lip trying to hold back tears, an unsuccessful attempt.
Shorter's lip quivered as tears gushed from his eyes. he didn't care who saw he was mad at Ash for not protecting him yet instead saved a random Japanese boy. he made excuses but what really went through his mind? he blamed himself, he blamed himself most of all. he blamed himself for not taking action sooner, he blamed himself for leaving early that night, he blamed himself for skips suffering, something skipper himself wouldn't want.
the others were also beating themselves up over how they hid instead of shooting back, and this was the outcome, a dead ball of joy.
lololololololololololololololo when they ask you how you are and you have to say that your fine when your not really fine. i cried a lot making this hence why it took so long to fix.
1/8/2021
word count: 524