01.3.21
12:38 pm
I saw E today. It made me really happy to finally see him until he told me he was talking to some girl. And how she got him a pair of sneakers. And what really got me mad was that he got her a Christmas gift. He didn't get me one.
It's not that I want something in return for the gift I gave him, but it's like if he got her something then he likes her. And it's like he didn't get me anything and that literally changed my mood entirely. I was so broken hearted in the moment but then I remembered who I was and moved past it.
I did bring it up to him tho. I told him I don't wanna hear about some girl he talks to and he asked if I was jealous. I said no I just don't wanna hear about it. I am jealous or was. I'm not anymore. But at least now I know that he has to think I have feelings. And he finds it so funny that I would be jealous. Like super annoying lol.
And then he had the audacity to say he loves me. I said it back but like I hesitated a bit cause when I say I love you to him I really mean it. Like with everything in me but he'll never know that. He'll never guess that I'm in love with him.
It was just really nice to be in his presence. It was really nice to finally see him after such a long time. And last night his mom came over to my house and she always tells her relatives that I'm going to be E's girlfriend. It's so funny cause it's like what if it doesn't happen. I know she'd die if it did.
It's just funny but that's how my 2021 is starting. How's yours?