Somewhere in the Avenue (Velez Cousins Series #1)

Chapter 47

"You all deprived me from the t-truth..." I sobbed, "Alam niyong lahat...ako lang ang h-hindi."

I felt him knelt in front of me too. I heard his very heavy sighs and his urge to touch me but I can sense he's having second thoughts. He just knelt in front of me while I'm covering my face with both of my hands. Iyak ako ng iyak at parang hindi na titigil.

"I probably looked so stupid..." I cried more.

"Love, I'm so sorry..." he said in the most gentle way as possible with his hoarse and cracked voice.

Nagtalukbong nalang ako ng kumot habang inaalala ang nangyari kagabi. This morning, I just locked myself inside my room and screamed whenever I can sense some attempts to open my door with the master key. I can feel my eyes turning puffy due to crying all night. Ni hindi ako nakatulog at umiiyak lang o nakatulala habang nakatingin sa kisame.

He never explained why he did that after I told him that I don't want any explanations from him. He just said "I'm sorry" multiple times while I'm crying my heart out. All he did is to console me while I'm hurting. Kanina, I heard him knocking at my door and attempting to get inside. I just threw my purse at the door, making a loud thud, while I screamed. That stopped him from getting in.

"I'm sorry. Please let's talk after I come home from work. Please, Einradelle..." I heard him outside my door.

Nag-init lang ang dugo ko. "Shut up!"

That made him leave.

I just couldn't force myself to be happy. My Mom and his Dad aren't married. Their marriage was called off. I should be happy right? That means...me and him...can be together again. Right? But instead, I feel betrayed, hurt, and angry. Everyone kept this from me. Even my cousins.

Naniwala nga akong magkapatid na kami kasi ginamit niya ang salitang 'sibling' nang mag-usap kami tungkol sa posisyon ko sa kaniyang firm. I was fooled. I felt stupid.

When I called him "stepbrother" during Audy's wedding, my reason is to keep reminding myself about our relationship. Hindi ko man inamin sa sarili ko na may epekto pa rin siya sa'kin, I know I need to call him that to refrain myself from having stupid feelings. I know I need to hold on at that thought to keep me sane.

And I probably looked so stupid. He probably had fun hearing those words from me knowing I'm wrong and dumfounded.

I want to ask why. Why did they hid it from me? My Titas...they went to some vacation almost a month ago because they wanted to visit my Mom right? Why did they concealed the truth from me? Even my cousins, even Yaya Imelda! I'm disappointed. Very disappointed.

Gano'n ba kahirap sabihin ang totoo? Bakit pilit nilang tinatago sa'kin kung ano talaga ang totoong nangyari?

Nanghina ako. I sulk in my bed more and sighed. Wala akong lakas na tumayo at ayusin man lang ang itsura ko. Kung ano ang suot ko kagabi ay 'yon pa rin ang suot ko ngayon. I couldn't help but think about the reason why Mom didn't pursue the marriage with Deonell's Dad.

Is this because she easily gets infatuated pero nawawala rin naman? Is her decision of marrying that man only based on her infatuations? Like how she later on agreed in marrying my Dad when she's forced to marry him? I don't get it. I really don't get it.

Dad died because of her. He died knowing his ex-wife is about to marry someone else. What will happen...if in the first place, Mom didn't planned on marrying someone else again? Will Dad be still alive today? Should I have lived a happy life? with no scars?

I looked at the alarm clock on my bedside table. It says that it's already 8 o'clock in the morning. I sighed and decided to force myself to get up kahit ayaw ng katawan ko. I just want to stay all day in my bed doing nothing but I have work.