Chapter 47

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Chapter 47

Tears


I feel so betrayed.



I stayed up all night just thinking and crying in my room. Kanina pa ako kinakatok ni Yaya pero desidido akong mapag-isa ngayong araw. I am so lost in thoughts that I didn't even care that they've been knocking outside my door then and now. Diba dapat masaya ako kung hindi nga sila totoong nakasal diba?


But...no. I feel so betrayed. I didn't know. No one told me. I was deprived from the truth.



"W-What?" I gasped because of his words last night.

I freed myself from his hug to see of he's really telling the truth. My heart beats are faster than usual when I saw his worried expression. I tilted my head.

"Deonell, is that true?" pigil kong tanong.

"Einra, let me explain—" he tried to capture my hands.

I cut him off. "Deonell, is it true?!"

I am panting right now because of my controlled outburst. Hindi ko na napigilang pagtaasan siya ng boses. I am so confused, dumbfounded and I feel so betrayed right now!

"I am not asking for an explanation! I want you to answer me!"

"No shouting, Love, please. J-Just...Can you please listen to me first? I—"

"No!" I roared.

Muling nanumbalik ang luha sa aking mga mata. He tried to take a step closer pero umatras na naman ako. His lips parted as he stared at me with worry. Napahagulgol ako at tinakpan ang mukha gamit ang dalawang kamay.

"I deserve to know, Deonell! I deserve to know!" my muffled voice between my sobs.

"Love..." I heard his weak voice, "I'm sorry..."

He quickly captured me in both of his arms in a span of milliseconds. I screamed and tried to free myself but he's too strong. I kept on crying and crying while trying to free myself until I immediately got tired. Napahagulhol ako at hinampas-hampas siya sa kaniyang dibdib. He purposely buried his head beside my neck while caressing my hair and back, as if that will comfort me.

My sobs are stifled because my face is pressed on his chest.

"I deserve to know...I deserve to know..." I cried and said that between my sobs.

"I'm sorry..." he continued to whisper that on my ears over and over again.

"Para akong tanga! Ginawa mo akong tanga!" I screamed and tried to push him away but he just tightened his hug.

"I'm sorry..." his voice broke.

Naninikip na ang dibdib ko dahil sa kaka-iyak. I never cried this way in front of him. Ngayon lang. I thought I am already drained inside that I can no longer cry anymore but here I am...crying again. Humahagulgol pa rin ako habang pilit siyang tinutulak palayo sa'kin pero masyado siyang malakas.

"You even have the audacity to say that we're 'siblings'! Is it fun fooling me?!" I screamed between my tears.

"Love, I'm sorry..." he continued to whisper that on my ears.

Nanghina na ako. Mabilis akong napaluhod kaya lumuwag ang hawak niya sa'kin at nabitawan ako. I sobbed so hard while I knelt down because of exhaustion. Pagod na pagod na akong umiyak pero hindi ko ata magawang tumigil. The emotions I felt are so overwhelming that I couldn't help but to cry out loud while kneeling down habang ang dalawang siko ay naka-tukod sa dalawang binti. My palms are covering my hands, making my sobs stifled.

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