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Murphy couldn't get Buck out of his mind, but no matter what he wouldn't tell Buck how he feels. He was standing by what he told his parents, no matter how much it hurts Murphy to die single he can't drag Buck down with him at least that's what he convinced himself of anyway.
"Hey, Kiddo."
Murphy looks up from his book to see Simon standing in the doorway. "Hi, you going to work?" Simon nodded walking over to Murphy nudging his feet aside so he can sit down. "Yea, you don't need to go anywhere right before I leave?" Murphy shakes his head.
"I might ask if Carson and Brent can come to hang out."
Simon hums placing his hand on Murphy's outstretched leg and squeezing lightly. "Just don't drive okay?" Murphy gives Simon a small smile nodding.
With Murphy getting worse they as a family decided that Murphy shouldn't be driving, just in case he gets into an accident and hurts not only himself but someone else. It hurt Murphy to give that up but he understood and agreed it was the best option.
"Be safe okay Dad?"
Simon doesn't answer, he leans over and kisses Murphy on the forehead before walking out of his room. Adam was at work so that meant Murphy was truly alone, no dog to pet him if he got sad just his own thoughts.
After sending a text to Carson to see if they would come over Murphy decided to make something to snack on, he walks towards the kitchen with his phone in his hand when his feet suddenly buckle and makes him start to fall. He uses his hands against the wall to slow the impact, he lays his head again the wall and cries. He knows that this is a symptom of him dying, he clutches his phone in his hand Adam and Simon told him to call one of them if he had another symptom but he couldn't. He was already ruining their life enough he doesn't want to make it worse by worrying them when it weres off.
Murphy was right, he got his feeling back and he was shakily standing up and the doorbell sounded. Murphy sighed shakily before wiping his eyes and limping slightly over to the door to open it.
"Oh my god, what happened?"
That was the first thing that Murphy heard when he opened the door, he rolled his eyes but moved aside to let Carson and Brent in the house. "I had another symptom," Murphy admitted, he had a split thought that he should lie but he knew that his two best friends would see right through it.
Carson looked away gulping he turned back to face Murphy. "Symptom of the thing?" Murphy rolled his eyes, everyone around him was scared of saying the d-word but Murphy didn't care.
"The symptom that I'm going to die? Yea."
Murphy didn't miss the way that Carson flinched, he didn't miss the way Brent looked at Murphy with sad eyes before walking over to the dining table in the kitchen and he placed a bag of takeout on the table. "We brought food, we didn't know if you ate yet so we decided to stop on the way." Murphy couldn't help the smile that graced his face at Brent's comment.
He walked over to the bag and peered into it, smiling when he saw his friends got him his favorite soup. "You guys remembered!" Murphy cheered sitting down at the table watching as his friends got their food out of the bag.
"Of course, can't remember egg drop soup."
Murphy tried to ignore the way Carson's voice cracked from emotion. "So, how are you guys? I haven't seen you guys much." Carson looked at Brent smiling when Brent nodded.
"Well, we got engaged."
Carson put his hand on the table to let Murphy see the ring. "Oh my god, why didn't you tell me!" Murphy whistled at the ring winking at Brent who let out a small chuckle.
"We were afraid, with everything going on with you we didn't want to add anything."
Murphy scoffed and looked away grinding his teeth together in anger. Luckily Brent must have seen that because he changed the subject. "What's been going on in your personal life? Now that you aren't working with Carson I don't get any hot gossip." Murphy decided early on to quit his job, he didn't want to spend what time he had left on this Earth working a job he kind of hated.
Murphy looked to the ground blushing as he thought about Buck. "Well..." Carson's eyes went wide as he leaned forward, he had this big smirk on his face. "Who is he?" Murphy scoffs waving Carson of but Carson gave him a knowing look which made Murphy's seriousness crack.
"His name is Buck Buckley, he is the firefighter who saved me. Then we just kept seeing each other, slowly but surely I fell for him."
Brent pushes his food aside putting his hands together on the table. "So are you gonna ask him out?" Murphy shakes his head quickly.
"Why not?"
Murphy gave Brent a look. "I can't ask him out, I'm dying. Sure I would like to spend my last few months in love but I can't do that to Buck, he's young. I'm not going to let my death drag him down." Carson shook his head leaning back into the chair.
"Don't speak only nods, do you love him?"
Murphy opened his mouth but was cut-off by Carson giving him a look, Murphy gave a resigned slow nod. "Then ask him out, you can't make the choice for him. If he doesn't want to be with you then he'll tell you and at least you'll find out before you die, do it before it's too late."
He grabbed his spoon and swirled it in his soup, he knew that Brent was right but he was afraid of getting hurt but at least Murphy would know the truth before he died right?
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