Pretty

Pilot

     "His hands... In all the place's I didn't want them"

     "His lips... against all the spots that didn't need them"

     "His eyes... piercing into the soul that feared him"

     "His...

"Hanna get up. Your gonna be late. "

"Mom! 5 more minutes. please. " I asked trying to shoo my mother away. She didn't budge.

"Not a chance"

I struggle out of bed, I couldn't really see much. My brown eyes puffy from the lack of sleep I've been getting. My mind was racing. I thought the therapy was supposed to help. I was on all kinds of antibiotics, and nothing seemed to be working. I cry myself to sleep each night, dreading the same dream that plays over, and over, and over, and over ,and over every night for the past 2 years. 

I walk over to the bathroom across the hall, and stare into the mirror.

"what the fuck is wrong with me" I shout. " Why is it always me" 

A tear rushes down my face, only to be caught by the empty container 7 sleeping pills used to sit. 

"fuck. I really took that many" I'm gonna have to get more. I grab my brush out of the drawer, and start brushing my long brown hair. My father always use to say my hair was a chestnut shade, always reminding him of our grand thanksgiving feast we use to host every year. 

"used" I repeated. 

We haven't really done much. My dad passed away last year from a brain tumor. The doctors went and did surgery, but they missed a bit, and set a nerve off. My father never really woke up. Well... He did, but he was braindead. I couldn't even go see him. I couldn't. I hate myself for it.  I was to fucking scared to see him like that. It only lasted three days. He died on July 17th, 2019 at exactly 7:08 am, on a Wednesday morning. My little brother Thomas had just graduated kindergarten. Of course he isn't my real brother. We adopted him from a family friend when they got to sick to take care of him. They are all better now. And we've arranged a schedule where he goes to his parents place for 2 weeks, and back here for three. He just left yesterday so I can finally get some quiet. 

I go back into my room and start to rummage through different clothing options. I choose an outfit and do my makeup. I hate the way I look. All I've ever wanted to be was pretty. Everyone always tells me that I am pretty. But I don't believe them. If I were pretty the so called "popular people" would like me. They wouldn't make fun of me and tell me how horrendous I look each and everyday. School kids wouldn't create Instagram pages on how flat I am, or  close ups featuring my belly rolls. I don't really have all that many but the close ups make them look deranged. My pale skin and all my freckles are always featured as, "Bellmore high's grossest bikini bods" I'm basically the mascot of that page. So I don't go to the beach anymore. well... not when any one's there. 

As I'm walking downstairs, I try to hurry and go out the door before my mother catches my eye. She does.

"Oh honey, take some toast with you. I have an extra slice for Chelsey!" She says while basically shoving the bag in my hands. 

"T.. Thanks mom" I shoot her a quick smile and glance towards the door. 

"Chelsey's here mom. I need to get going" I start to back up

"Have a great first day honey! I'm sure this year will be different!" She exclaims.  

I mutter under my breath. "yeah, you always say that"

"what's that" Mom asks

"I said yes hopefully mom!" I say with a fake cheery voice and high pitch excited girl voice or ... You get it. 

There's Chelsey sitting in her bright blue mustang, waiting to pick me up for school. Chelsey is one of the popular girls, but she's the only one who likes me. We've known each other since we were born. 

Honestly, She's my bestfriend... My only friend really. 

"Get in Hanna Mason. Its our first day of senior year. I'm so hungry! Let's get food" She talks so fast. 

"Here my mom packed this for you!" I say handing her the bag and ALL it's contents. 

She looks at me and raises an eyebrow.

"I already ate. Don't worry" I lied.

"Okay! If you say so!!!" She smirked and took the bag from my offering hands. 

And With that.. We are off to school. This is going to be fun... 

End of chapter one! 

I hope you enjoyed this book. Let me know in the comments if you want me to keep this series up! Don't forget to vote and share it with a friend! 

Love you! 

Lex!