My Sister's Keeper

30

i thought long and hard about how i wanted to do this... and i'm a horrible person... also, i have realized i have no idea how to write cristina, she hasn't braced our screens for so long.... fingers crossed for a return soon. and i have no idea how to write medical parts... i am NOT a doctor.

i've been writing ahead, and i realized when i don't remember when specific events happened in the show. sorry if the timeline isn't right and if people wouldn't be the right age, but it's my story and it's very OOC and AU anyways.

alexander karev needs to come back. i miss him. :( but o'malley!!!

There's so much I don't understand. When I was younger, I used to think that growing up, being an "adult" meant having all the answers. It meant not being bothered by all the small things and being able to make peace with the past. And don't get me wrong, I don't think you're really an adult until you've got a job and live alone, but I thought the small steps you make are enough to see a difference.

I'm still so confused about a lot of things, and I think maybe I'll never understand.

She couldn't remember most of what happened if you told her word for word. She had cried as her family had left her, she'd gone back to Cristina Yang's hotel room, drank just enough tequila to make her tipsy, and passed out on the couch in her hotel room.

Was this what college was? Blacking out after drinking? She hadn't even had that much! And the headache forming in her skull was enough to tell her not to do it again.

She woke up to Cristina sitting across from her, contently eating cheerios out of a box. Did they not have Cheerios in Switzerland? She blinked at her.

"You look like your mom, but some of your face is your dad."

"You know my dad?" She sat up, trying to remember if her dad had ever mentioned knowing Cristina. She did slightly remember her dad fangirling over her. Who wouldn't? Hearts in a box?

"I know all the doctors in Washington." Cass raised an eyebrow in response. "And your aunt showed me a picture." She shrugged. "He wasn't terrible on the eyes."

Cassie cleared her throat, getting up from the couch, blinking back the forming of a headache in her temple. She had cried in front of her aunt's best friend, for quite a while. The woman probably thought she was a wimp or something. "I'm gonna go back to my dorm and take a shower, have my first meal of dorm food."

"It's okay to miss them, you know. I left Seattle years ago, and part of me still feels like I made a mistake. But hopefully, you'll find something here that makes you want to stay. That's why I never went back. Or you could go home. No one would blame you for that."

Cassie's feet stopped her before she could make her way out the door. "I can't go home."

"Says who?"

The impending guilt from her father? Her aunt thinking she couldn't take care of herself? She wasn't a child! She'd spent the majority of her childhood alone, not needing anyone or anything except someone to feed her. She'd given up on finding someone to love her because it just didn't seem possible. Molly had loved her, but not in the way that she wanted to be loved.

And now that she had that, she didn't want to give it up.

Meredith wasn't some overly mushy character. But she was everything Cassie had ever dreamed of and more. It was in the way they sat at the kitchen counter at odd hours drinking hot chocolate or sat on the couch together. There were no abundances of "I love you", and Cassie didn't need to hear those words to know.

She had gotten so attached and now she didn't know who she was or if she was happy out here on her own. It was like she didn't know how to be independent anymore. And that was crazy. She wasn't going to be following Meredith around like a little puppy for the rest of her life.