Chapter 23

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“Oh shit!” I opened my eyes in surprised. I’ve heard Gray cursed before but what I was surprised is how he reacted. I was a bit embarrassed too. He pulled away from me and walked towards the window, where we watched the fireworks earlier.

My breath is fast and I became red as I felt embarrassed. Oh my God! I saw how my shirt is crumpled. I put both hands in my face in embarrassment. I zipped my pants.

But that actually feels nice.

I shook my head at my dirty thoughts. It was but that wasn’t right. We’re in a freaking school for freak’s sake!

“I’m sorry!”

“I’m sorry!”

We both said as we’ve recovered from what happened.

“Oh no! Don’t be, Juvia.” He went over me. I’m still seated on the table where he put me. I blushed again as I remembered that.

“No,I know.” I said, struggling for words. Maybe, he didn’t like it. Because I was…I don’t know. Rigid? Awkward? Not good enough? Because he has experience more than I am?

My face heated up more. Maybe, my body isn’t enough for him? What if I wear an old bra tonight? Oh no. I have eaten so much today. I must have fats on my belly. Oh God!

“No, you don’t. It feels nice but I got carried away. I shouldn’t do that. I mean, not that I didn’t like it but-“

“No. Gray, I’m sorry too.” I panicked. “I know you’re the mature one here…maybe uhm..my body…-“

“What?” He asked confused. “Hey, don’t cover up your face. Look at me.”

He put down my hands over my face. I looked down from embarrassment. He tried to catch my eye. I was so embarrass. To think that I was the first one to kiss him! Maybe I wasn’t a good kisser! Oh God! Am I a lame girlfriend? I put back both hands on my face.

“Hey, hey, hey. Baby, no…” I heard him, almost in panicked. “Talk to me. Are you mad?”

I shook my head. “Then what is it? I’m sorry, Juvia.”

I shook my head again, still covering my face. “I should be sorry here, Gray. You stopped because I’m rigid and quite awkward. You think, I’m a bit crazy because I kissed first. I made the first move. And that my body…I know, you had experience with other girls…I know that. And maybe they’re –“ I keep blabbering until he stopped me. He held my hands away from my face. His now completely not letting go of my hands.

“What are you talking about, Juvia?” He asked.

“You stopped. Maybe, I wasn’t that enough.” I said slowly and almost in a whisper.

“WHAT?” I could hear his echoes from this room. I looked at him. He put a hand over his forehead. He closed his eyes and I saw how his jaw clenched.

“Juvia, that’s not what I’m thinking of!” He almost sound offended. I couldn’t understand what he said. “It’s not that you’re not enough for me. Is that what you think why I stopped Juvia?”

I looked down and slowly nodded. I heard him cursing again. I don’t really know why he stopped. I was just thinking that I wasn’t enough for him that’s why he stopped. I felt his hand on me and his other hand tilting my chin to look up to him.

  “Juvia, I stopped because it’s not that right thing to do. And not here.” He said. “It should be in a proper place, proper time and proper moment, Juvia. It’s not that you’re not enough.”

I could clearly see his eyes even if it’s dark. It seems to lights up in the dark. And I like that. I love things that shine at dark. I love Gray because he lights whenever I’m in dark. He’s the light whenever I’m in darkness.

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