The last strands (#Tronnor)

Chapter 2: The kiss

During the nighttime, when our thoughts are most vulnerable to desire, we let our deepest demons roam freely from one corner to another of our minds. This has been known for centuries, and even today we perform de most terrifying horrors when influenced by the darkness. But this is also when we are most open to change, and to new ventures.

For Connor, these last nights have been such a case. During the time when the sun wouldn’t shine, inside his bed sheets, his mind would often play tricks on him and deceive him. Dreams. However to the young man his dreams do not appear to be dreams, or at least not at first sight. So naturally when he sees himself in a bed with a guy he has never seen before, he thinks it’s real.

-“Who are you?”—he would ask to the apparition, as he noticed he was wearing no clothes and neither was his company.

-“Does it matter?”—he replied, as he leaned in close and kissed him on the lips. It didn’t feel like anything, because it was a dream of course.

Or maybe not, because as soon as he pulled away, Connor was face to face with a man he knew. And not just any man: Ricky Dillon.

-“You like this, don’t you?”—The fantasy Ricky asked.

-“Ricky? What? Why…?”—Connor asked confused, unaware that his friend was now approaching even closer to him.

-“This is what you want, don’t you?”—Ricky accused.

-“No… Ricky, don’t… not you… not…”

Connor pulled away and his friend was gone. And suddenly, a bright light shone upon him, revealing him undressed and alone on his bed. And standing a mere couple of feet away watching him from a distance was Tyler.

-“Coward.”

With those last words of accusation Connor woke up. He found himself in his bed alone, with his pajama on, as he had fallen asleep the night before; his house empty, no company in the bed sheets, and his shorts… damp.

But the rage still flowed into his mind. The heat, the desire. He couldn’t believe himself. He couldn’t accept the fact that he would even think about his best friend in such a way. Not only was embarrassed about it, he was destroyed. After taking a minus shower in which he only rubbed of whatever residues of last night’s dream had left him, Connor put on some jogging clothes and proceeded to exit his new apartment in search of a fitting route where he could do about his morning exercises from that day forward. He went about his business after he found a local park that seemed appropriate for his needs, and decided that he would never allow himself to think that same way about Ricky again. Because it was ok to be different, but there’s got to be boundaries to those who mean something to you.

When he was on his way back to his home, Connor thought he saw a familiar face walking towards his apartment. At first he wasn’t sure if that was her, but that blonde hair style could only be from her after all. He thought about turning over and walking away, but the thing about Hannah Hart is that she is more perceptive than what people give her credit for.

-“Connor?”—she asked as soon as she spotted him—“Connor!”

The young woman started to chase after her friend, who wouldn’t acknowledge her. She had probably learned what happened to Tyler, and was most definitely there to scold Connor. She, along with Ricky and Korey where the three people that cost Connor’s trust from Tyler. They all knew about his secret. A secret he had hoped to keep only to himself, even if his dreams thought differently.

-“For God’s sake Connor, stop running away!”

At the remark, Connor had to stop. He could no longer pretend that he wasn’t the person Hannah thought. He never could in the first place, but lately he liked to get his hopes up.