Broken, Pained and Damaged

Chapter 3- The Battle Of Emotions

Hello.... I know... Double update.... No update for another 2 weeks after this. Wicked, am I not?
Well... This chapter is a tear jerker. Just warning you my fellas... Go ahead and read
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At the sound of the alarm clock, Zhao Yun Lan wakes up only to realize that he had slept for fifteen minutes. But for the first time, he is happy because in different circumstances he wouldn’t have got any sleep at all so this was definitely a start. Yet, he still groans in frustration for he hadn’t had a good night’s sleep in a long time and it is making him lethargic than he was before.

Throwing away his quilt he lazily walks towards the bathroom to clean up. After a difficult hunt of approximately ten minutes, he finds himself a decent set of clothing; black pants and a black long sleeves shirt. He frantically puts them on, rolls up his sleeves up to his elbows, and slides on his sneakers. He finds his backpack and randomly throws things inside like his black headphones, 2 folders containing writing paper, his wallet, phone, pen drives, laptop, a different set of clothes, and some CDs.

He barged into the kitchen made himself a cup of coffee and poured it into a thermal mug and walked out of the apartment while grabbing his keys. He walked towards his car while sipping his coffee. He unlocked the car laid the backpack on the seat next to him. Settling himself with the click of his seatbelt he stepped on the gas with one last glance towards the apartment.

Within 20 minutes he arrived at his favorite café ‘’The Hangout’’. He walked in with his backpack in tow and ordered himself another strong coffee along with a lime cheesecake. He sat at a table at the far end so that he could get some peace and quiet. He pulled out his laptop and one of the folders which were labeled as Poems. Till the laptop powered up Yun Lan glanced outside, what he saw was a little boy playing with his dad and a ghost of a smile touched his lips but it disappeared as soon as it had appeared. He pointed his attention back to the computer screen, opened a saved word document, and began to type furiously his fingers moving at the speed of lightning.

While all this was happening, Da Qing observed him from afar and was the only one who noticed the flicker of a smile that graced his face. Although it should give him a tinge of hope it didn’t because he hadn’t seen that smile on his friends face in quite a long time and it would be so for the rest of this lifetime. If only things were different he thought to himself but shook his head to abandon such thought because he knew it would be pointless. So with an agonizing sigh, he brought the order towards Yun Lan and set it on the table, lingering, trying his best to make himself seen by the other.

Finally, when Yun Lan did look up from the screen Da Qing’s smile flushed away replacing it with sadness for his friend who was there no more, it was the shell of the man he used to know. The mischievous gleam which was forever evident was traded with an icy cold demeanor that held no kindness or sympathy. Da Qing raked his hand through his hair in hindrance, dragged out the chair in front of him, with a screeching noise which Yun Lan flinched at and sat down. He glanced at his friend for the umpteenth time to realize that he was avoiding his eyes as usual. Da Qing couldn’t hold it in anymore, due to his agitation he slammed his hand on the table raising a few heads from around them.

 "Good morning Zhao Yun Lan’’ Yun Lan flinched for the second time that morning whereas Da Qing smirked victoriously as he finally got a response from the man whom he calls a friend.

‘’I hope you are doing fine. Since you do not have time for me anymore, let me tell you. It’s my birthday today you dipshit. You never forget but for the past two years, you’ve been forgetting. I’m turning 20 and you have no care in the world. I’ve been knowing you since we were 10 years old and you dare to forget me, don’t you. Well, let me give you a piece of my mind. I hope you go to hell and live there in pain so that you will understand how hurt I am for your negligence of me. You’re the only one I have after my parents died and now you dare to leave me alone in this crappy world. You asshole I hate you so much. Why would you do that? Why would you suddenly start to ignore me as if I was never there? It’s unfair you know. You are my best friend but that witch took you away from me. What did she give you that you completely disregard me? Do I disgust you that much Yun Lan? Talk to me? Tell me, do I disgust you that much? Am I not important anymore?’’

The angry reproach ended in a painful choke and unshed tears on Da Qing’s childlike face. His intention was not to let out what he had held in his heart for so long but to get an expression out of him to make sure that he cares and is still there inside of him struggling to get out but to his utmost shock, Yun Lan looked at him with sheer ice. Da Qing let out a gasp and got up from the chair, eyes still staring with disbelief he turned away and ran towards the kitchen holding on to his heart desperately trying to ease the pain. 

Zhao Yun Lan in contrast had stopped typing, he was staring at the computer screen aimlessly and replayed what Da Qing had blurted out over and over again like a broken recorder. Even though he didn’t show any emotion every word uttered felt like daggers piercing and twisting through his heart. He never wanted to let him down, surely not like this. The one who despite everything was there for him until a few seconds ago where he left, disbelief clouding his face. He knew he had lost him. Who would wait for him when he himself was slowly becoming unknown to himself, slipping through his fingers. He studied the cheesecake in front of him where a smile was threatening to tug at his lips, he was suddenly taken back to so many years ago.

‘’Da Qing, I’m home’’ Yun Lan shouted happily.

"I’m at the kitchen, Yun Lan. Get your ass here’’ Da Qing screamed back in equal happiness.

He walked towards the kitchen and said," you seem to like my ass quite a lot Da Qing.’’ While showing off his ass to his best friend just to earn a hard slap. He yelped rubbing his bottom. Swirling around to piss off his friend, he was stunned. His Da Qing, just 14 years old was cooking. He couldn’t believe his eyes.

"What are you doing Qing Qing?’’ questioned Yun Lan still in a daze. 

"Oh…. Lan Lan, I’m making your favorite cheesecake’’ Da Qing replied with a chuckle.

"Wait wasn’t your mom the one who made it last time?’’ Yun Lan asked in disbelief

"No, I made it. My mom taught me to cook since I was 12 because I love cooking. So here it’s almost done, wait a bit, Mr. Hungry’’ Da Qing replied affectionately.

A few minutes later he placed a cheesecake which was in the form of a heart with lemon peel sprinkled on top. Yun Lan was speechless. No one has ever done something like this for him. His parents loved him but they were constantly at work so they didn’t have the chance to spoil him with luscious food. So when his best friend who was the same age as himself made this for him. He felt the grand gesture somewhere deep in his heart and for a moment he thought it tingled.

"Da Qing, I don’t know what to say but thank you for this. You know how I’m not the best talker so if there is anything you want me to do for you just let me know’’ it was his way of saying that he feels deeply loved and appreciated and Da Qing knew this.

"Yun Lan, I don’t want anything from you I just want us to be best friends forever alright.’’ Da Qing mumbled while stroking Yun Lan’s head gently with great care.

The memory pricked tears in Yun Lan’s eyes, his childhood was beautiful and most of his memories were occupied by Da Qing, his little cat. Yun Lan sniffled at the thought but came back to his senses and looked towards the door which led to the kitchen with eyes full of adoration which Da Qing would have killed to see but he didn’t and never would. What Yun Lan failed to see was that beyond the kitchen door his best friend was perched against a window crying heavily, in fact in remembrance of the same memory. 

Yun Lan hurriedly gulped down his coffee when he realizes he is late for work. When his eyes reached the cheesecake, he couldn’t leave it but he was late. He weighed his options, grumbled a little, grabbed all of his supplies along with the cheesecake and hurriedly walked towards the counter and requested for a takeaway box. In receiving the box, he quite literally ran out to his car, quickly jumped in, and drove towards the Peking Publishing House

-----------------------------------------------------------Like it? Hate it? Let me know your thoughts. With that I take my leave

~Rovena