Half of my heart

Adjusting

I fall onto the bed next to Brad exhausted. I haven't slept good in the past 2 weeks since we brought Briella home, and neither has he. She's such a good and happy baby, but she just doesn't like to sleep and we're lucky if we get 4 hours a night. I would do anything right now to be able to sleep a good 8 hours, but I have no idea what to do. It's 8 in the morning and we should probably just get up for the day, but I just fed her and if she's going to sleep a little longer, I will too. I drift off to sleep quickly after I lay my head on Brad's chest and sleep straight though until 10.

I look around thinking something isn't right. My head is now laying on a pillow and Brad is no where to be seen. There are no sounds coming from the baby monitor, and I'm scared for a minute before I look at the time and realize Brad probably got up with her. The curtains are shut, lights are off and it's quiet enough to hear a pin drop. It's quiet enough to fall right back asleep, but I can't sleep knowing that Brad is downstairs with her.

The sight I see when I walk into the kitchen warms my heart. Brad is standing at the counter with Briella balanced on one hip and trying to cook with the other hand. Every few seconds he looks over at her making her smile back at him. I want to stand and watch this, but I miss her and Brad so I walk over to them and wrap my arms around Brad from behind.

"Morning." He says in his groggy voice.

I take Bri from him and hold her close to me for a minute before kissing Brad quickly "Morning." I walk over to the table to sit with Bri and watch him cook. Having her in my arms is a feeling I can't even describe. She's so amazing to Brad and I and for us to think we made her is even better, it's just so surreal. I'm so tired I could fall asleep right now, I haven't showered in a few days, I've heard high pitch screams non stop and changed numerous diapers over the past two weeks but I wouldn't change any of it. Brad has been such a huge help and I can't get over how good he is with her. He loves her so much and I can tell she's already his princess.

"Here." Brad says setting my plate in front of me and sitting across from me.

I put Bri in her chair on the table so we can watch her whilst we eat and take a bite of the food. Everything Brad makes is good. I don't know if it's just that he cooks and most husband's don't, of it it's that he's really good, but either way I always love what he makes. Bri starts to cry and I take her out of her seat to try and calm her down.

"She might be hungry." Brad says so I feed her. Right away she starts to eat and slowly closes her eyes letting us know she's abo it to fall asleep. I move to the couch so I can get more comfortable and feed her until she stops eating and falls asleep for good. I carefully put her in her bed next to the couch and go back out to the kitchen to finish eating my breakfast.

"I think she'll sleep for a while now." I tell Brad as I sit across from him. He stares across at me carefully examining my face confusing me "Is something wrong?"

"You just look really tired. Maybe you can sleep for a little while she does." He carefully chosen his next words making sure he doesn't say the wrong thing "We both know it's not good for you to be very tired." He has a good point, I'm always a bitch when I'm this tired and I would be now if it wasn't because of Bri and me knowing it's going to be like this for a while.

"Are you sure?" He's easily as tired as me and could use the sleep too. I wait for an answer and he just stands up, walks over to me and walks me over to the couch where we lay next to each other and fall asleep right away. His arms wrapped tightly around me, Bri being in her bed next to us and Norman on the floor make me feel so content.

"Just remember, it's your turn to get up with her when she wakes up." Brad reminds me that he got up this morning.

"I know, but I'll be able to get her to stay quiet and maybe sleep some more." I cross my fingers hoping that I'm right. Truthfully, we know as soon as we hear her cry we're most likely both going to wake up to make sure she's okay.