So far yet so close

Prologue

Everything can change in just one day.Yes believe it when I say this.You will never know what tomorrow will bring you and this is the worst part of it cause it looks like an exam that you weren't prepared for and you fail.But this failure makes you reflect deeper about your life, your mistakes, your behaviours and everything all around you.This way you find something different inside yourself that you didn't even knew that could exist.You find a strong you that isn't afraid anymore to fight and to say otherwise.This is the best part of failing.

Yes I was afraid to fail, to make things wrong or to take wrong decisions cause I was afraid of what was behind failure ,I was afraid to discover what was in the darkness of failure and I always tried to keep myself away from everything that made me feel afraid or scared.I never wanted to fail ,I was scared of that feeling.But I didn't know that this way I made it more difficult for myself cause one day I was gonna face worse than failure and I wasn't prepared for anything.

LIFE.Is all related to life,,,, everything we do leads us to life.Everything we want leads us to life, every moment is part of our life, failure or victory are part of life, everyday is a day of our life.You see everything means LIFE.
But what does it mean life to you?What does it mean to fail?And after all what does it mean to live?

Answers to these questions you need to find out by yourself cause my life isn't same as yours.You can never have the same life as mine, the same brain as mine, the same thoughts as mine and the same destiny as mine so the answers of these questions and every other questions you need to search somewhere deep yourself and not in other people.Find yourself inside you and believe me that you will find answers for every single question in your head eventhough it isn't going to be easy.

Back to life now.
So when life has other plans for you, then everything can be possible even the things that you were so freaking sure that you would never let them happen ,they will happen that's why we say "never say never" cause no one know what tomorrow will bring us.

You will never imagine that sometimes the worst place you can be is in your own head and this is worse than being kidnapped from the boss of italian mafia.It was the worst feeling I've ever had.I struggled a lot to come to the surface.I cried, I suffered, I blamed myself, I fought, I tried, I got tired, I gave up, I did everything but in the end I understood the real meaning behind all of this.

I am just 22 years old but I learned a lot from life and now I can say that I am a new version of me that fought everyone and everything to survive and being this strong girl that I am now.
Being strong isn't easy cause you have to not believe in words but actions and this is the problem cause everyone wants the truth but no one wants to be honest.

I am North Foster the daughter of the boss of Russian mafia.So my life had always been with bodyguards all around me, I hadn't have a moment to stay alone except in my room cause this was the life I had to live.Being part of a mafia family isn't easy and you always have to be prepared for everything.You understand that family is the most precious thing in your life.Eventhough I had to live in danger I have been always happy and I had lived an happy childhood.I always was a fan of mom and dad's love and I am still.They are so perfect together and I adore them.They are everything to me including South, my big brother and we were so happy until one day.

That day that I learned the truth.The big truth that changed my whole life forever and that day I understood why my dad had learnt me to be a strong fighter cause he knew it in what a wild world they brought me.In that day I was full of anger and I promised myself that I will do everything to change what was happening to me and I would run away of that world that I was involved but I was wrong cause without understanding I became a part of that world.I was a part of that world since I was born but I always hoped that I would escape but I was so wrong, I was so fucking wrong for everything.It was just the beginning and I was going to face a lot.I wasn't aware of what was waiting for me.I made promises to myself but it was worthless cause those promises in the end were broken from the reality I was thrown into.

But from all of this I've learnt a lot.
Since that day that I was taken away from my life I understood the real meaning of "everyday is a second chance" and "time doesn't exist you have to do it now or never".I needed to be used to the idea "no regrets in life just lessons learned" cause otherwise I wasn't going to survive.I just needed to take everything that happened to me as a lesson and not as a regret cause this way I was going to blame myself and I was going to take just backwards steps in a time that I needed so much big steps to continue towards.I needed to breath and to live my life as a game where you have to fight a lot without giving up in case to win or you will fight but not enough to win and you will lose.

The choice is yours but you have to be sure not to regret about your choice cause then you will be in a big trouble with yourself and this is so much worse than keep going forward eventhough it hurts.So,,, you see is all about life, is all about living and breathing ,is all about fighting about your life cause after all this is the reason why we are living, we are making everything possible for our life.In the end of the day is again another day of our "LIFE" that we leave behind to never live that day again.

I left every day behind ,I left everything behind ,I never looked back but just ahead cause I needed to go on with life ,I needed to protect myself from everything but I just didn't know that he was everywhere not just behind me and that's where I was stuck.I was stuck with him without even realising.I didn't asked for this ,I didn't want this, I wasn't ready for this but I had no choice.I was just a victim of this dirty game where I needed to be careful of everything.

"Be careful who you trust cause the devil was once an angel."

Hello everyone.This is my second story here in wattpad.
I hope you enjoy and please give me a little support on this.I need u all here❤❤