Mute😐

😪

I laughed.

"Ok now listen when you hung up from your little call.. Gloko smacked his teeth and called some girl to suck him up and he drinking that lean"

I scrunched up my face then hung up. I can't be mad cause I did the same to him but I'm tryna change.

I called him

He answered on the last ring which hurt my feelings cause he always answer on the first ring well used to.

"Jaleel wya"

"It's Gloko and I'm... outta the country" he laughed taking a sip from his double cup

"Jaleel pour that out and bring yo ugly ass home"

"Nah I'm finna get sucked up then I'll be home to take a nap" he laughed and I hung up

"God you really testing my patience today" I looked up at the ceiling then pulled the lean outta my drawer and grabbed a double cup off my shelf

I chugged that and drunk 3 more cups.

Others might say I'm killing myself slowly but all I'm doing is helping myself.. I think.

Hell ion even care no more

"We home and we come baring food" when they said that I grabbed my shades and put them on and ran down stairs.

"Where it's at"

"In the kitchen and why you got them shades on" KT questioned me

"Aht don't worry bout it sweetheart"

I looked up and saw Jay shaking his head

'Don't Look At Me Like That' I started to feel guilty

'No cause you know you killing yo self but yet you still drink it cause your so called helping your self'

"Why y'all staring at each other like that" Chazz said

"No Frl cause Jay look like he wanna kill her and she look like she fucked his bsf and she feel bad" Ray said

"Wait is that who you had 12 rounds with" Das asked

"No that was a prank that was Ace" I shrugged and threw my food away

I saw Jaleel looking at me like he was guilty but then switched to nonchalant

"You know what atp I feel as if y'all got super powers like y'all look at the food and it just goes inside your belly and that's how y'all eat so quick" Kai mugged me and Jay

I laughed and accidentally took off my shades.

"Tf yo eyes look like that for" Ray came close asl to me

I bagged up and chuckled

"Personal space is a thing" I put my shades on and went upstairs

'Lemme talk to you' Jay said

'Come to my room'

"What's up with you" he walked in my room

I shrugged

"Something is wrong you just been doing dumb shit all week"

'I have this self sabotaging problem that why every chance I get to be happy I ruin it because no one ever stays with me everyone always leave so I'm saving me and him from a heartbreak' I explained in my head the got up and shrugged

"So why you drinking lean"

"Cause when I smoke I gotta go talk to my momma and daddy and ion wanna do that it's just gone be them making me feel even more guilty" I took a sip from a double cup

'Stupid whore' I heard Jay think

'Bitch' I mugged him

He chuckled and ran at me taking my double cup and all then lean he saw then running downstairs

I ran after him but I couldn't catch him

'Damn nigga you play football'

'YuP'

And when I finally got to him I saw he was pouring all the lean out

"Why you doing that" my voice cracked

"Because that's bad for you" grabbed all the bottles

"Look at all this" he brung the lean bottles to the living room where everyone was

"Who's those" Kai mugged

Jay looked at me and I looked to the side

"Damn the door white" I said trying to act confused "damn never knew that" I looked forward to see them looking at me

"Heyyy" I smiled

"Don't Heyyy us wtf you got all these for" Chazz mugged

Ace just shakes his head

I knew Ace was disappointed in me more than anyone because his father died off of lean he was closer to his father more than his mother so that hurt him.

"I'm sorry Ace" I ignored everyone else

He shook his head and tried to leave but I just ran and hugged him

"Mmcht hug me back" I pouted on the verge of crying

"Let me go" he said very calmly

"No .... Ace" I looked up to see him looked forward with and unreadable expression

"You done" he looked down with a bored expression

I nodded and left out the door and started walking

"Everything I do hurts them in some way... and I feel like a disappointment and a burden"

'Don't think that' I heard Jay say

'Sani it's not the time and you know it's the truth'

I checked the cameras to the house on my phone and saw them all there laughing and smoking

"See it'll be better without me"

I cleared my head and walked back to the house..

I know this chapter is all over the place but next chapter ima get it together

Filler.
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