Keep You Close - HO

•4•

I tap my fingers nervously against the table, I definitely got here a little bit too early, but that's just who I am. I always over prepare and arrive places at least ten minuets early.
"Meeting someone?" Ronda, my normal waitress asks me.
"Actually.. I'm waiting for Haz and Tom." I say.
"Oh!" She says with surprise.
Ronda doesn't know the details of mine and Haz's breakup, but she probably figured it out when we stopped coming in together every Saturday morning and started coming alone. I feel like Ronda really saw us grow together, and also saw us fall apart. We went from feeding each other strawberries, to me impatiently waiting for him to get off his phone. If only our epic love could have lasted.
The doors open, and I see Haz walk in, looking over to me with a smile.
"Looks like Tom's not showing." She mutters to me, before walking away from the table.
Haz walks over to the table, pulling out a seat to sit down.
"Early as always." He says to me.
"Where's Tom?" I ask.
"Well about that." He laughs lightly. "He's not coming."
"What do you mean he's not coming? Why isn't he coming?" I ask.
"Because I told him not to." He says nonchalantly.
Of course.. I knew it was going to turn into this.
"I agreed to lunch with friends." I state.
"We're friends." He nods and I roll my eyes. He always finds a loophole, that's what makes him such an amazing CEO and business man. It's annoying. And it gets old.
"We're ex's." I correct him. "Ex's don't get lunch."
"Well we can get dinner then if you'd like? Or go somewhere to talk?" He asks.
I can't help but let out a small laugh, he always manages to turn everything into a joke, which is great most of the time. Just wasn't so great when I needed him to be serious.
"Let's just get this lunch over with." I say.
Ronda starts to walk out with our plates, pancakes with strawberries on top. The usual.
"Thank you, Ronda. Could we get the lady a mimosa too?" Haz asks.
"Of course." Ronda nods.
"I stopped getting mimosas with breakfast." I say to him, and his brows scrunch together.
"Why? You love mimosas." He states.
"Alex helped me to stop drinking so much." I say and he gives me the most over dramatic, extra sassy eye roll I've ever seen.
"Excuse me?" I say.
"What's with that guy?" He asks. "He gave me dirty looks all night, but then you say he's not into you."
"Well honestly Harrison I don't owe you an explanation for my friendships." I say, making him smirk.
"I missed your attitude." He says happily.
I eat my pancakes, really trying to not enjoy Haz's company, but I really do. It feels like when we first got together all over again. The teasing, the funny remarks, all of it.

Flashback
"No way you could do it that far!" Haz exclaims as he pushes me down into his rolling desk chair, rolling me across the room. He sits on the top of his desk, grabbing the bag of almonds and eyeing it to throw it across the room and into my mouth.
"Just do it! I'm gonna catch it." I say.
He finally throws the almond, and because of my amazing coordination I catch it, throwing my hands into the air in victory.
"Holy shit!" He laughs. "That's impressive!"
"I know right!" I giggle as he walks over to me, pulling me up to meet his height.
"You've got a talented mouth, wonder what else it could do." He teases, and I roll my eyes.
"It can talk, and sing, and eat." I say.
"You really can't ever just play along can you?" He asks.
"Nope not really!" I grin, and kiss his lips
End of flashback

"This has been nice." I admit, even though I really don't want to.
"I've missed you so much Angel.." he says, reaching his hand across the table to rest atop of mine. I quickly slip my hand away, a frown settling on his face.
"Haz.. you can't just take me to lunch and think that everything will go back to normal." I shake my head.
"I know that.." he sighs. "But can't we at least try? Come on.. it feels just like old times."
I shake my head, sitting back in my seat with disappointment. This is exactly what I didn't want to happen. Haz and I seem to just blend together so easily, it actually takes work to stay away from him. I shouldn't have allowed myself to get this close, and I shouldn't have allowed him to feel like there was hope of saving what has been gone for so long.
"Haz it would just end the same way. You'll loose interest. The only reason you want me is because you can't have me." I say.
"That's not true Kylie-"
"Do you not remember how it was before I broke up with you?" I ask.

Flashback
Haz sits on the couch, scrolling through his phone. I clasp my hands onto the opening of my robe, excited to show him the new lingerie I got just for him. He's been distant lately, so hopefully this will get me some attention tonight.
"Haz." I say.
"Hmm?" He hums, still not putting his phone down.
"I have a surprise for you." I smiles.
"Hold on just a second." He puts his finger up to me, before typing away.
"Can't you put your phone away for an hour?" I ask quietly.
"Can't." He says. "Business emails."
I decide to make a bold move, dropping the robe to the floor. If anything can tear him away from work for just a little bit, it's this.
His eyes lift, looking my body up and down, but the spark that I was expecting to see in his eyes wasn't there.. it hasn't been there in a while. I feel insecurity fall onto me, making me wish I hadn't done this.
"You look great, but I'm really busy with emails." He says, looking back to his phone.
I feel a pang of pain in my heart, embarrassment settling in me as I quickly pull my robe back on, tying it closed.
He doesn't love me anymore...
I lay in bed for hours, tears falling down my cheeks. I've finally realized he just doesn't want me like I want him. I'm just an accessory, just like any other piece in this oversized house. I'm not his Angel anymore..
End of flashback.

"I remember.. believe me I look back on that time often.. and it makes me so angry.." he shakes his head in frustration. "You deserved so much better, and I didn't give you the time of day. I'll never be able to take that back."
I feel hurt.. hurt that he's just now realizing we had something special, and he let it slip away. Now here we are, and he's making me feel so conflicted. I can't do this.
"I should go." I say.
"Please don't go.." he pleads.
"Haz, you can't do this to me. You can't make me fall in love with you all over again when we both know it'll end badly."
"It won't. I've changed, Ky. I had a business meeting today but I canceled to come see you. I've changed my priorities." He gives me a look of pure hope, those blue eyes making me melt as they always have.
"I'm sorry Haz.. I just don't think we're in that place anymore." I mumble.
I can see how my words hurt him, but I have to protect my heart now. I can't let him, or anyone else hurt me again.
"I really should leave now.. it was good seeing you Haz." I say, setting down money to pay for the food. He looks at me with broken eyes, and I know he's waiting for me to change my mind. He knew it only took one look into my eyes to get what he wants.. not anymore.
"Bye.."
______
I lay in my bed, trying to process the last two days. Everything was perfect, but after seeing Haz I feel like I've taken six steps backwards. He brought up so many feelings that I thought were gone, and I really didn't expect to still be affected by him as deeply as I was.
I text Alice, telling her all about the lunch and what happened. She's the most logical one of the friend group, so I know she can help.
Alice: well Ky.. it really just seems like you miss him.
I sigh, texting back.
Kylie: of course I miss him.. I was with him for three years.
Haz was my first real, true love. He was my fairytale love. I will always have a place in my heart for him. He showed me how a person deserves to be loved and treated in a relationship, and sadly he also showed me how a person does not deserve to be treated in a relationship. I learned a lot from my time with him, and if I know anything, it's that you don't go back to someone who didn't make an effort. People don't change. Haz hasn't changed.

A/N: aaa I'm ✨sad✨now. This story is going to have lots of sad moments so I apologize in advance hehehe