Levi x Reader | ONESHOTS

life is worth living.

[ a/n | if you are uncomfortable with self harm and abuse themes, please skip this chapter ]

With no destination in mind, you were trapped in a relentless pursuit, haunted by the grotesque specter eternally etched into your psyche. The relentless replay of that nightmarish image had you on the run, but there was no escape from the suffocating darkness that clung to your soul. You were caught in a nightmarish loop, an infernal torment that threatened to unravel your sanity. It was as if you were shackled to a relentless treadmill, condemned to run in agonizing circles.

The world around you had plunged into an abyss of despair, shrouded in the darkest of nights. The once-bustling streets now lay barren, echoing with your frantic footsteps. Torrential rain cascaded from the heavens, each drop a relentless reminder of your own tears. Every step you took sent ripples through the cold, unforgiving puddles that pooled around your feet. You gasped for breath, your lungs burning with exhaustion, weighed down by the oppressive burden of sodden clothing clinging to your shivering body. But still, you pressed on, driven by an insatiable need to escape the torment.

The rain, an unrelenting accomplice, drenched you to the bone, seeping into the very core of your being. It was as though the heavens themselves wept in sympathy for your anguish, their tears mingling with your own. Each drop that fell only served to amplify your unrelenting sorrow, turning it into a tempest of despair that threatened to consume you entirely. The world had become a cold, indifferent place, matching the desolation within your tortured heart.

As you continued to run through the merciless night, your breath ragged, your soul aching, you knew that the pain would not relent. The horrifying image that pursued you would forever haunt your every step, and the ceaseless rain would remain a cruel companion to your misery. In this nightmarish landscape, you were a wretched figure, tormented and broken, endlessly fleeing from the unforgiving grip of your own inner demons.

As you stumbled upon what appeared to be an entrance to the dark, labyrinthine underground, a place that held haunting memories, your strength finally crumbled. Your knees gave way, and you collapsed onto the damp, unforgiving ground.

You had no sense of direction left; even if you did, your leg throbbed with a relentless agony that threatened to tear it from your body should you attempt another step. The past, a relentless specter, descended upon you once more, and you were overwhelmed. You crumpled into a disheveled heap, your trembling hands desperately covering your face as your grief erupted in gut-wrenching sobs that seemed to tear through your very soul.

With no escape in sight, you turned to prayer, your voice choked with despair, pleading for a miracle, a sliver of divine grace that might offer solace. You sat there, hopelessness enveloping you, as your mind replayed every traumatic incident, each a scar etched deep within your psyche.

"Why?" you choked out, your voice filled with torment, "Why does this relentless nightmare have to torment me?" Doubt crept into your heart, and in that moment of darkness, a sinister idea took hold. You knew what you wanted, what you believed would finally free you from this unending pain. You whispered encouragement to yourself, your words dripping with desperation.

Your trembling hand reached for the knife you had kept hidden, your reflection in its gleaming blade mirroring your inner torment. "Why didn't I think of this before?" you questioned, though the answer lay buried beneath layers of denial. It was because you clung to that dwindling ember of faith, fueled by a faint glimmer of hope that one day, your suffering might be justified, that your life could find meaning amidst the chaos.

flashback

Your life, though confined within the protective walls guarding against the titans, was anything but ordinary. In Wall Sina, where your parents served as members of the garrison, you found a measure of comfort, if not luxury. Yet, your aspirations set you apart; you dreamed of joining the Survey Corps, yearning to explore the world beyond the walls, a choice your parents vehemently opposed due to the grim mortality rate.