miscellaneous

✨ sparks

SPARKS

            There she was, rocking herself to and fro in the middle of her living area. Tears were streaming down her face, occasionally splattering onto her knees as she swayed. The love of her life, Ian, had just broken her heart into a fine powder. His words echoed into her head causing the spill of more tears.

            We just can’t be together, he said to her. No reason or explanation further than that statement. She thought he’d felt the way she felt over the past months. The sparks, the constants need of each other, the love. She cried in realization of how stupid she was. How she couldn’t believe she’d let this happen to herself.

            Though, she couldn’t find herself to be angry with him. Her love for him overcame her emotions. She silently hoped he’d come back through that door, saying it was a joke – not a very funny one but it would do. Instead, the door remained close as she remained heartbroken.

            Her phone began to ring, alarming her. She smiled thinking it might’ve been Ian calling for her. Although, as she checked the caller I.D. it was just her friend. Hesitantly, she answered and pressed the phone to her ear.

            “Hello?” her voice croaked.

            “Elle, you sound like you were crying. What’s wrong?” Her friend, Carlie, asked. She was using her nickname that originated from her middle name, Elliot. Charlotte Elliot Rose; a name she’d never go by. The name sounded formal yet boring, so she told people to call her Elle or Elliot.

            “H-he broke up with me,” her lips were quivering. Now that she’d said it out loud, she realized that everything that was happening was real. It was as if her nightmare had come to life as a threat.

            “Oh . . . Elle, how are you taking it?”

            “Horribly. I think I’m going to take a nap, Carls.” She said, controlling the slight quiver in her voice. Before her friend could object to anything, she’d hung up and immediately turned her phone off. After shutting it down, she chucked the device somewhere around the room and crawled her way to her bedroom.

            Making it into her bedroom, she crawled onto her bed and slipped beneath her duvets. Lying on her side, a fresh stream of tears slid and landed on the cool pillow. The pure silence in her apartment made it much worse for her. Her thoughts slowly began filling the silence. She shook her head vigorously, attempting to shake away the thoughts.

            The more they came, the more she felt as if it were her fault. As if she was to blame for their splitting apart. A part of her knew it wasn’t her fault but the more she began pondering, the more she felt it.

            She felt uncomfortable; sleeping alone. Tossing and turning, wishing he was there to comfort her. To hold her and kiss her until she was calm. Everything was better when she was with him.

            But it was over now. She couldn’t change a thing. She couldn’t go back in time and stop him. All she could do was face reality. I should’ve expected this, she thought. Her past relationships weren’t very decent. Ian was the longest, most intimate relationship she’d ever had. Only with him, she’d felt the sparks and the joy.

            She couldn’t take it anymore; she let her eyes flutter shut. Gradually, her thoughts silenced themselves leaving her in a semi-tranquil state of mind. She inhaled, and then exhaled; clearing her thoughts completely. Repeating the action, she began to focus on sleeping.

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author's note :: i wrote this last year too. i didnt really have a plot for it, kinda just rushed into it. so idek man. i think i had it as a zayn fan fiction.