The Old Woman and the Sea, and other short stories

saltwater monologue

The date was going well by all accounts. Victor was sitting in a restaurant he hadn't been to in years -- a casual Mexican joint his companion insisted was her favorite place in town. Not a conventional first date spot, but if she'd suggested anything more conventional, Victor would have probably had a full-scale panic attack by now. It was easier to pretend it wasn't a date with cheap plastic seating pressed against your leg. The woman across from him wore her hair in a short, stylish, black bob that swung forward as she took a sip of her horchata.

"But that's Jay Leno for you, isn't it?" They shared a chuckle.

"It really is," Victor agreed with a smile. The pause stretched from amicable to awkward.

"Okay," Carol began again. "I know you mentioned having kids when we chatted before. Tell me about them!" She paused, as if sensing his apprehension. "I know that's not the 'right question' to ask on a first date. But fuck it, I'm 43 now." She laughed. "It's not weird for me to be dating someone with kids."

"Well, I have two kids. Valeria, she's thirteen."

"Ah, the teen years," Carol smiled knowingly. "A fun time to be a single parent, huh?"

"If I said it was easy, I'd be lying," Victor laughed. "But she's a good kid. She tries her best. Just like her sister, Maria. She's nine, so that's been..." he paused, thinking back to the late night drug store run he'd made the night before. "It's been fun."

"Oh man, sounds like Mother Nature has started calling." Her face curled in a look of horror. "I'm sorry. That's such a weird thing to say. Ignore me."

"No, no, you nailed it." He leaned back in his chair and took a sip of his drink. "It was defintely an adventure. But, you know, my mom's been a huge help in teaching me what I need to know and even after Suzanne passed--" he paused, clutching the drink tightly as he took a breath, but Carol seemed to not notice. "Suzanne's mom helps a lot too. She's actually watching the kids tonight." He put the drink down delicately. Something was...off.

"It's great that you have both sets of grandparents involved," Carol was saying.

"Yes, definitely. What about you, any kids?" He tried not to look perturbed as he took another sip of water.

"No, it just wasn't in the cards for me," she responded, her mouth drooping almost imperceptibly. "With my job as a photographer I'm always--"

"Funny joke, by the way," Victor rubbed at his temples. "Sorry, go ahead."

"No, what joke?"

"The salt." His mouth felt dry. He felt 10, 20 years younger, and not in a good way.

"What salt?"

He paused. "Does your water taste a little salty?"

Her brows furrowed as she took a sip. "No. Does yours?"

"Yeah, try this," without thinking he thrust the glass into her hand. Her brows furrowed again, then cleared in an expression made mostly of concern.

"I don't taste anything."

"Very funny Su-- Carol." He looked up and saw the look of confusion on her face. He took another sip, then spit straight back into the glass. "This is so salty! Are you messing with me?"

"Victor, what are you talking about?"

"Sir, would you mind, taking a sip of this?" He held the glass out at a passing waiter.

"Victor!" It came as a whispered hiss. "You spat--"

"I really don't think--"

"No, of course. My apologies. Could you get me another glass of water, please?" He rubbed balled fists against his temples, his eyes, until he saw spots.

"Are you all right, Victor?" Carol leaned over the table to grab his arm. He could feel his resolve slipping as his brain travelled back to another night, another table. Maybe over there by the corner. Or there by the window. He stood up, hands over his eyes and yelled to himself "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

Only, of course, to find that he had been yelling out loud.

"I'm sorry," it came out as a mumble. He couldn't quite look at her face. "I'm so sorry, I think I'm not feeling well. I should go."

"Do you need a ride? Do you need me to call an ambulance?" Carol looked equal parts concerned and frightened.

"No, I'm sorry. I'm just gonna go home. I'll text you later." It was an automatic promise, but not one she probably wanted him to follow through on. Victor wasn't sure what made him feel worse, his self-sabotaging of a date that was going well, or the imaginary salt on his tongue.

He pulled his coat from the back of the chair and stumbled out the door, letting the eyes follow him out.

Inside, the waiter approached Carol. "Are you okay?"

She looked up at him, shaking the daze from her eyes. "Oh. Um. Yeah, I'm...I'm okay. Can I get the check?"

"Oh, uh. He actually gave us his card when he came in? He's a regular. Well. Kind of."

"I see. Well, thank you. The food was great."

The waiter nodded, leaving the woman to her dazed staring. Eventually, she stood up, grabbed her purse, and stepped out into the fresh fall air. Take a left, two blocks, make a right, one block. And there was a small grey sedan with a window down.

"How'd it go?" The driver asked.

"All right." Carol opened the door and took a seat. Fastening her seatbelt as the window rolled up of its own accord. She reached inside of her own mouth, pulling two silicone pads from the insides of her cheeks. Her wig, too, was thrown in the back of the car, revealing a closely shaved brown scalp.

"Did you get what you needed?"

"Yeah, he'll alibi out easy."

"No. Did you get what you need?"

She let out a painful laugh, ignoring the tear running down one cheek. "I got crumbs."

------------ author's note ----------------

I wrote this story after receiving the following prompt from a friend:

A woman is on a date with a man, and it is going great until he becomes convinced she put salt into his water and becomes irate.

For me I had to think about...why would he think she'd put salt in his water? Would she put salt in his water? This was the story I came up with. I'd love to hear your thoughts and guesses as to what exactly is going on here! And once I've got some guesses, I might share what my intention was 😉. But at the end of the day, this is your story. Whatever you think happened, that's canon!

Cover art by Trinity Nguyen on Unsplash (https://unsplash.com/photos/ePXU-t7HYE8)