It Had to be You (Valdemar Series #2)

Kabanata 31

Nanghihina kong tinanggal isa-isa ang basa kong damit. I opened the shower and let the water travel all over my body. Hindi ko na alintana ang lamig dahil sobrang naramdaman ko na ang lamig sa labas.

I sat down the tub and my tears were silently falling. Ayden kissed her? She kissed him and he kissed her back? Why? Am I not enough? Is she more beautiful than me? Is she that worth it that he can sacrifice everything we have just to be with her?

Am I that worthless to him?

I didn't do anything on the tub but cry. Hindi ko matanggap. Ang hirap tanggapin. Nagawa niya ba iyon dahil inaway ko siya noong nakaraan? Is it because I am not brave enough to tell him that I said yes because I love him? Is it because my mom? Dahil ba sa pamilya niya at negosyo? Is this because of his mom's order to go overseas for college?

I want to laugh at myself. I am really finding reasons to understand what he did and where did I go wrong when it should be me, standing up and fighting for myself even when it hurts.

Nang makalabas ako ng kuwarto ni Amethyst ay naroroon na si Faye. She was arranging the food on the center table. Si Amethyst naman ay naghahanap ng movie sa kaniyang flatscreen T.V. I silently walked on the salas and sat down the couch.

"Anong movie ba, Faye?"

Faye ate a chicken nugget. "Comedy."

I forced myself to smile. Kumuha rin ako ng nugget at kinain iyon. Faye handed me a pillow. Nang hindi makapili ng movie ay umupo na lang si Amethyst sa sahig saka nagsimulang kumain. Good thing my friends are here.

Looking at them, I realized how lucky I am despite of getting hurt by the man I love. I don't run and I face everything but that doesn't mean that I don't get hurt. I feel pain but I know I am strong enough to overcome it.

I ended up crying again and telling them what happened in that place. Amethyst even cleaned up my wounds. Ang hindi nila mapaniwalaan ay ang sinabi kong tungkol kay Ayden at Danica. I told them that we fought when I was drunk. Sinabi ko sa kanila ang sinabi sa akin ni Atlas tungkol sa pagkausap ni Ayden sa ama nila, pati na rin ang babala sa akin ni mommy. I told then that I returned the ring to Ayden and I saw my necklace on her neck that night.

Laglag ang panga ni Faye sa sinabi ko. Amethyst cursed so much. Kahit sila ay hindi makapaniwala sa sinabi ko. I even showed them the text from Ayden's number. Pati ang parehas naming buhok ay alam nila.

Amethyst madly wanted to talk to Ayden. She called him a hundred times but he didn't answer. Whenever I think that he's still on that bar with Danica makes me wanna rip my heart open so it won't slowly tear apart anymore.

I slept on Amethyst's unit. Pati si Faye ay doon na nagpalipas ng gabi. I didn't come home the next day. Malakas ang kabog ng dibdib ko nang nakita ko ang pangalan ni Ayden na tumatawag sa cellphone ko nang bandang hapon. I didn't answer him. I don't want to talk to him.

"He might ask Daniel where we are, Am." Banggit ni Faye.

Amethyst shook her head. "No way. Daniel don't know I have a unit."

Fifteen more missed calls and he finally stopped. Nakahinga ako nang maluwag nang wala na akong natanggap na tawag. He might think that something is happening. I hope he feels guilty. Ayokong itanong sa kaniya ang nangyari. Gusto kong siya mismo ang magsabi sa akin. I want his honesty. Kung kinaya niyang gawin iyon sa likod ko ay dapat kaya niya ring sabihin at panindigan sa harap ko.

"I knew it. Boys will always be boys. Kahit na gaano pa nila sabihing mahal ka nila, mangangati pa rin talaga at maghahanap ng iba." Faye rolled her eyes.

"Damn, girl. Who hurt you?" Kumunot ang noo ni Amethyst. "But can we give him the benefit of the doubt? He's also our friend, Faye. We should be fair."