Plan Of Seduction

17. Useless Walnut

     "He didn't." Kyle reassures, hugging me at an angle. "Dad probably hates us, treated us like garbage and never spared us a glance unless he wanted to let off steam, but he never touched me inappropriately."

     There was hesitation when he finishes his reaffirmation, pausing, and my skin tingles uncomfortably - my heart hammering in my chest at his next question. "Did he, you never clarified whether he did or didn't, he didn't right?"

More tightening, "I don't know. Some part of me says no, I don't remember anything of that sort. But then there's this other part of me that's screaming to be recognized, but I don't know."

     And then there's these nightmares, I kept to myself, the nightmare I had for years growing up. Of a boy crying in my bedroom, begging to go home. But I don't know if that boy was me or if that boy was. . . Kai. And if it was me, where was home? Where was I? And if it was Kai, why didn't I ever say anything? Why did I hold onto that tearful face?

     "How's college life anyways?" Kyle quips, looking around the living room in an attempt to change the topic. I'm thankful, "Looks cozy."

     "It is." I easily respond, "Life here is a lot cosier."

     "Is that because you're away from home or because you're with Tripp?"

     I snort, "Because I'm with Tripp. Even when I was at home, simply hanging out with Tripp would put my world back on its axis."

     "I'm glad he finally confessed," His nose twitches, as if remembering something distasteful. "Being around you guys was awful."

     "Actually, I was the one who confessed."

     "Woah!" My brother exclaims, pushing at my chest. "This is better than you telling me that you watched gay porn on accident after I came out to you, tell me the details!

"It was one time!" I whine, gripping his wrists and silently thanking the higher being for the 'on accident' excuse. I did only watch it once, but it was after waking up from a wet dream of Tripp pinning me to the lockers in the football change rooms, during my junior year. "And yeah! I confessed first. I didn't think he liked me as more than a friend, and in an attempt to rip the bandage off I just kissed him. And then he kissed back and we confessed and yada-yada."

     "That-" He gives me an incredulous look, "You literally left out all the details."

      "I really don't know what else to add." I shrug, "One day after we moved here I just started overthinking my feelings about him, I think it's cause he came out to me as bisexual, so the thought of him dating me just skyrocketed."

     "He's bisexual?"

     A hum, "That's what he said. I never really paid much attention to his dating life in high school since we didn't go to the same one but I do recall seeing him with a lot of friends in general."

     "Well you guys finally accepting this is a lot better than that awkward pinning you've been doing for years."

     "It wasn't awkward."

     "Logan, for junior and senior prom you barged into my room in the middle of night having a crisis about wanting to take Tripp to the prom. Then, you spent exactly 30 minutes on both occasions, convincing yourself that it would be a terrible idea before ultimately deciding that it would be best to just go with your girlfriend." My mouth opened to argue but he continued. "AND THEN, on prom night you would take your date to the dance, stay approximately an hour before telling them you were too tired, coming home to change, then heading over to Tripps for the weekend."

     There was no argument against that. Having Kyle tell me all this makes me realize just how much of a sucker I was for Tripp even back in highschool. "When we called, you said he liked me since the first night. Is that true?"

     "Mhm. I remember I woke up in the middle of the night to use the restroom, and when I stumbled into the entertainment room, you were on his lap asleep. And he was looking at you like-" His lips purse as he looks for how to describe whatever he saw. It makes me almost wish being there, Kyle grins as he responds. "Like he had found his muse in life."

     And that effectively made my heart leap against my ribcage, because Kyle was a candor being. Above anything else, he was honest, so him confessing this to me made my confidence in the relationship increase, even if just slightly.

From: K(reep)ai

I set you and Kyle up for 3:00 P.M. tomorrow.

     What came next was the link to the building where we would meet. Kyle sniffled as he looked at the message, nudging my shoulder with his to say 'I'm here, we can do this'.

     We can do this.

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Notes while editing:

I know my writing style keeps changing, im so sorry. I try staying consistent but it never works.