Miraculous Ladybug: Get me out of here

Baby, baby, baby, hell no

"Hey, baby."

Unfortunately, I wasn't flirting with anyone or snapping my fingers to make a JoJo reference. I was actually trying to get the attention of a giant baby who wanted to suck on me like a lollipop.

And it was working. The huge baby beamed down at me, reaching out his grabby hands, saliva dripping down his chin. His mouth was way too big for my liking; the creature was going to swallow me whole. But could I run fast enough?

Well, you won't find out until later. Ha! Okay, how about we backtrack a bit, find out how your pal Johnathan got himself into this mess.

So, no surprises, I'm not really a big fan of talking to people on the phone. I get... antsy when I get calls from numbers I don't recognise. So you can probably guess how I felt when I got a call from a number I didn't recognise. I was just hanging out, lying on my bed at my dad's house, sighing internally and fiddling with my hearing aid. Then my phone started ringing.

"Hello?" I picked up the call.

"Hello, John," said a vaguely familiar voice. Not Marinette or Adrien, thank the gods.

"Alya, right?" I asked. To be honest, I couldn't be bothered to ask where she got my number. That thing seemed to be everywhere at this point.

"Yup," she said. "Hey, listen. I need a favour."

Of course...

"What is it?" I asked.

"So, I'm sure you know about Marinette's... infatuation... with Adrien, right?" Alya asked.

"Who doesn't?" I asked.

Alya mmm-hmmed. "Well, you see, me and the girls have got a top secret plan cooked up to set them up on a date."

"Marinette can't just ask him out herself?" I asked. "She could use the confidence boost."

"No way, you know what Marinette's like," Alya laughed, like she was almost sorry for Marinette. I really couldn't blame her.

"Fair enough," I grunted. I had a feeling I wouldn't get out of this one. "... What do you need my help with?"

"Well, you see, we've got this top secret plan," Alya said. "It's called Operation: Secret Garden."

"Uh, go on," I raised my brow.

"We've all been given code names based on a flower," Alya said. "For context, my code name is Tiger-Lily, Marinette's is Lotus, and Adrien's is Buttercup. Your code name will be-"

"Wait, hold on," I said. "Why do we need code names?"

"Because it's top secret," Alya replied. "Anyway, your code name is Daisy."

"I hate that name," I grunted.

"Too bad, Daisy," Alya continued. "Moving on, this afternoon, 'Buttercup' has a photo shoot at the Trocadéro fountains. His security guard, a.k.a. the 'Nanny', will be waiting for him in the car on the other side of the esplanade, in the 'chariot'. He's supposed to take 'Buttercup' back home after the photo shoot, except that's not gonna happen. This is where we come in. Step one: 'Rose' will have a fake 'No Parking' sign. She'll go over to-"

"Uh, do you mean that Rose girl at your school, or is that a code name for a different person?" I asked.

"Code name for a different person," Alya sighed. "Juleka. Rose - I mean the real Rose - is there too, but her code name is Tulip."

"Okay..." I furrowed my brow. "Go on."

"So, Rose - the fake one - will put the fake sign next to the 'Nanny's chariot'," Alya told me. "Step two: 'Sunflower', aka a girl named Mylène, will go find a police officer and say to him: 'Hello, Mr. Police-Officer. Oh, look! That car's parked illegally'. 'Well, you don't say! I shall enforce the law right this second! Thank you, young lady.'"