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Miami, Florida

June 2013

When we arrived in Miami, we were put on a strict timetable and told there'd be no time for partying or fooling around (a dictate that met no opposition since it was a city known for its nightlife and only one of us was old enough to drink in the States.) We were set on a rigid schedule the second we stepped from the tour bus, and introduced to a large team of people who would take custody of us while we filmed.

We would spend two days at the renowned Temple House (a huge mansion that had been converted into a venue for commercial use) shooting the music video for our next single "Best Song Ever" alongside Director Ben Winston and writer James Corden. Together with our normal crew and the new film crew, we assembled to form a dream team, all working around the clock like a well-oiled machine to accomplish a common goal. The timelines we aimed for were unheard of, particularly since we were also finishing an upcoming album (on the road) and were also in the middle of our tour. We ran through tons of light-work the first day before heading into the evening show at the American Airlines arena, and then returned to set the following morning to take on the heavy duty prosthetics.

On Day Two, as I prepared to film my scenes as Harry and not Marcel, I ran into Niall who was playing an overweight studio exec named Harvey, and Louis who was also playing a studio exec named Jonny, to which shuddered uncontrollably. They looked like human swine.

"What the hell is this?" I asked, pulling at Louis' forearm hair. "Looks like pubes. Imagine getting that in your food, mate."

"That's quite offensive if I'm honest lad," he said, pulling away. "Don't let it happen again. I'm old enough to be your father—" he popped his collar for dramatic effect.

"But, mate, it's covering your bloody watch!" I grimaced. He tucked the hair beneath his watchband.

"You could probably even braid it, Tommo," Niall added, laughing full-tilt.

"Look who's talkin','" Louis spat, snatching a few hairs from Niall's chin.

"Owww! You pulled the glue away!"

"You look like me granddad or something..." I said, studying the details in Niall's prosthetics. "It's very unnerving. And look at this..." I pointed at Louis' dense mat of chest hair. "How can you be balding with that much body hair? It looks like carpet! Pick a struggle, mate—"

"I refuse to stand here and be bullied. Not all of us can be so lucky, Harold." He abruptly took his leave from us. Niall laughed after him, and it was so mind-bending to hear such a familiar sound expelled from such a strange face.

When I left him I ran into Liam who was now dressed as himself, thank God. I asked where Zayn was and he said he had seen him in wardrobe a few minutes ago. Entering said room down the hall, I heard a lot of bustle among the racks and saw a few of the ladies in charge enjoying a coffee break.

"Mornin'...just wondering, is Zayn here?"

"Down the hall, love, getting dressed I'd assumed. Or willing himself to, anyway. He wanted to do it alone. Don't ask me why."

"Hm..." I remarked, pursing my lips before thanking them and slipping back into the hall. I checked a few rooms to no avail, before finding a locked door. I knew he was behind it.

"Z?" I called, knocking. "It's me..." There was a pause where I doubted he was even there, before the door floor swung open and I was presented with such a strange sight my jaw dropped.

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