The Project [Louis]

Chapter Five (Or Louise is Not American)

"Are you watching porn?" I groan, rubbing my eyes.

And then, something lands on top of me.

"Ayeeee!" A voice sounding like Niall yells from on top of me, shoving what feels like a phone in my ear. I presume that the sex noises are coming from Niall's phone, because now these is loud moaning and skin-slapping being transmitted right up my ear canal.

"Get off." I roll over, opening my eyes to see Niall falling off of me and on the bed next to me, tapping something on the screen of his phone and the noise of sex stops.

"Harry almost had a hear attack when I did that to him." Niall says, stretching out on my bed.

"True." Harry comments, still burritoed up in his blanket on his own bed,

"I was supposed to wake you guys up to tell you that we have to get on the bus." says Niall, sitting up and hopping off of my bed.

 "Where're we going?" I ask, curling into myself because I really don't want to move right now.

"El Paso, Texas y'all." Niall says in a southern accent which is most definitely offensive to actual southerners.

"I don't want to get up."

"Me neither!" Harry chimes in.

"Let's start a petition." I mummer, shutting my eyes,

"But then we'd have to get up." says Harry, 

"True."

+

"I hate you, you, and mostly you."

(Liam's the one I hate most.)

"Ditto." Harry says. He's currently lying in the middle of the floor on the tour bus, limbs splayed out all around so that getting past him you either have to step on him or very carefully navigate yourself around him.

I'm sitting on the kitchenette counter.

"Sorry." Liam says, sounding not very sorry, not even looking up from his phone while talking to me.

"It was pretty funny." Niall tries to reason from his spot on the little couch across from me,

"My personal favourite part of the whole thing was when Niall started dry humping Harry to re-wake him up." Zayn says wistfully. "It made the whole thing extra classy."

"I hated that part." Harry pipes up and I decide that Niall is not who Harry likes. I mean, he was hardly half-hard after that ordeal.

"How about when I tied Louis' feet together? I think that was pretty good." Liam argues, this time looking up for approval.

"You know I hate people touching my ankles." I make a face at him.

"Why d'you think I did it?" Liam sticks out his tongue at me.

"And I watched the whole thing." Zayn smirks at us.

The lot of them decided that they would find the most creative way to get Harry and I out of bed. It consisted of a lot of yelling, dry humping, jumping, and limb-binding.

Must've been kink-heaven for Harry.

I mean, I'm surprised he didn't get a full hard on through all of that.

I sigh and pull out my phone. I open Twitter to scroll through stuff, like always. It never stops being entertaining. Yesterday, I read a tweet expressing a theory which involved a five-way relationship between One Direction to make up for the lack of women on the road.

That one was particularly disturbing.

Today, though, most of the tweets are links to a YouTube video. So, I click on one of them, which leads me to a video of Louise's. A new one. That's new.

Aha I'm still tired.

"Hi! So, like, for starters, my parents just found out about my video thing, and they're pretty sure that someone's going to kidnap me just because I said I live in Canada."

She starts off with that inspirational first line. I hadn't thought that she lived in Canada, although now that I think of it, I remember her saying something about Canada before. 

"But secondly, I really want to hug Louis, as some of you may have inferred, and I have yet to have got it. I don't think that's grammatically correct."

She looks away from the camera, a confused expression on her face before continuing.

"Like, I don't know if this'll do anything, but I had an idea. If you live in Canada then I bet you feel like no celebrities ever pay attention to our entire country. Like, they may come to just Toronto or Vancouver but other than that Canada is just a big piece of land full of bilingual people. So, if you live in Canadia - shit - Canada, they please link this video to Louis on Twitter so he'll fucking notice that there's a country of people here who fucking love him. Fucking bye now."

She ends with a smile, not matching her words.

I look up, now realizing how loud the volume on my phone is. Everyone - excluding Harry who might actually be asleep - is looking at me.

"Motherfucking Canadians." I purse my lips.

"Motherfucking Canadians." Liam nods at me.

a/n: vote please! i'll update sometime after this chapter has thirteen votes if it gets that many.....