Love & Loss

Chapter 80

Her body curled in just slightly, the hand against my back pressing against my shirt.

Then she just silently nodded, burying her head deeper into my neck and chest.

It was a simple response, but I still knew that I could at least give her that.

I wanted her to have some reassurance until this all is done.

She wasn't usually the kind of person that constantly needed it, but I just wanted to be sure.

I wanted to be sure that I had everyone that I loved covered until all of this was said and done.

Nico's POV:

Every part of me felt empty.

Cold.

Numb.

Emotionless save for the constant ache in my chest that refused to go away.

The constant agony that was haunting me.

I couldn't even remember how long ago Xander left.

I couldn't remember how long ago the guards dropped off food.

Although the smell of spoiled blood that reeked through this cell told me that it had been at least a couple hours ago.

But the fact that my breaths were running heavy though my mouth saved me from sensing it all the time.

I don't know why they kept trying. I hadn't touched a single thing that they brought me.

The very thought of consuming something made me sick.

I couldn't remember how long it had been since my body completely collapsed, leaving me laying on my side upon this cold stone floor.

I didn't have it in me to care.

Every part of me was exhausted but I refused to close my eyes.

Every time I did, I would see her.

I would see her face smiling, shining more brilliantly than anything I'd seen before.

I'd hear her laugh.

The laugh that could make a whole room brighten.

I'd feel her touch warm my heart, and make each passing day worth meeting.

Someone that gave me something to look forward to.

And then I'd open my eyes, heart snapping again as I brought my arms to my chest and remembered that there was no one between them.

No one...

The wing that lay over me tightened against me while the other just layed flat against the floor.

And even that small bit of movement caused my muscles to scream and ache.

I didn't know what my future heald at this point.

I didn't know where to start anymore.

My future was never really something that I worried about, despite living the life of an heir.

I knew that I could never plan it perfectly, and because of that, I never tried.

But that changed with Khloe. It changed so quickly that I was certain that I would live in a future where I was happy

Every plan that I finally came up with...

Every plan had her in it.

And now it was gone all over again.

What the hell was I supposed to do now?

I couldn't think of anything, anything, that would even come close to what I had.

I didn't want any different answers. I knew what I wanted and the fact of the matter was that I could never have it.

I had lost it. I let it slip right through my fingers like an idiot.

Now I was just left with nothing.

My body grumbled, causing me to squeeze my eyes shut and deal with the ache.

I felt so weak, yet never found it in me to try to change that.

The will to try had dried up and withered.

I kept my eyes closed, but my mind kept repeating these thoughts, preventing me from sleeping.

It felt like my fate was no longer within my own hands, and oddly enough, that thought was the only comfort I'd found through all of this.

I'll let it take me wherever it wants.

And if it wants me here in this cell, wasting away...

So be it.