bts one-shots

namjin

metastacia on ao3

The Kim Namjoon Boyfriend Experience

"Hyung, isn't that your boyfriend over there?"

Seokjin whips around to where Jeongguk is pointing, and his eyes nearly pop out of his head. Halfway across the hall, walking with a carton of milk in his hand and a bag full of bread in the other is the guy that Seokjin claimed was his boyfriend.

"Oh, shit."

Okay, so you might be wondering: how did Seokjin get into this mess? Why is he going around claiming random men are his boyfriend? Is he incapable of getting a man through ethical means?

To that, Seokjin says: fuck you.

It's kind of complicated, you see. It hasn't been long since Seokjin made the enlightening discovery that hey, the reason why he kind of was never really interested in dating girls was because he wanted to date boys instead. Well, if by wanting to date you mean fantasizing about it but being too chicken shit to actually go out and date a boy. Seokjin's a little bit terrified of that part. Sure, he's twenty and in university and he's dated girls before and never felt nervous about them, but this was different. This was a whole new ballpark and Seokjin's a little bit terrified of the balls.

That came out wrong.

Let's start over.

Seokjin's twenty years old. Came out to his friends last year. Has never dated a boy before. Too chicken shit to date one. Oh, wait, he said that part already, didn't he? Sorry, you'll have to be patient with Seokjin, he's still a baby gay. Very nervous about gay stuff. Is doing his best.

His friends know this and love him regardless. There's Park Jimin who knew he was gay from the moment he learned that you should never wear socks with flip flops, Kim Taehyung who came out as pansexual at sixteen and wears socks with flip flops just to piss Jimin off, and Jeon Jeongguk who watches anime. No one knows what his sexual orientation is, but he has a body pillow of Hatsune Miku that he left back home and a shirtless Son Goku as his phone's background.

Seokjin loves them dearly. Would never tell them that, but whatever. They're the reason that Seokjin's in this mess to begin with. Ever since he came out to them they've been nothing but supportive and loving and they were all there for him whenever he felt confused and depressed. They also want Seokjin to have someone in his life, and perhaps they're just a little bit overzealous with that endeavour of theirs.

He didn't really know how he felt about it – nervous, maybe... discomfort, even. All he knows is that after being signed up on both Tinder and Grindr and shown just about a million pictures of guys that Seokjin could be set up with, he'd had enough, and one day showed them a picture of a dude he found by chance on Twitter and claimed that they were dating.

For a while, things were okay. They asked about Seokjin's alleged boyfriend that Seokjin didn't have any selfies with, and Seokjin was quick to make up excuses. Made up a lot of them. Luckily, they didn't question him too far – because it's only been a year since Seokjin came out and they knew how nervous he was about dating boys.

Seokjin, Jeongguk, Jimin and Taehyung – the four nations lived together in harmony like that, but everything changed when Namjoon appeared halfway across the hall, walking with a carton of milk in one hand and a bag of bread in the other.

"Hey, hyung, isn't that your boyfriend over there?" Jeongguk asks, pointing halfway across the hall to the dude that looks exactly like the guy in the pictures Seokjin showed them.