Estranged • Harry Potter {1}

Sixteen

Cora couldn't believe the OWL's were two days from now. She wasn't prepared in the slightest and even though she didn't mind tests, she definitely minded this one. If she didn't pass, she didn't graduate and her family would truly disown her if that happened, even her wonderful mother.

So with every moment she could, Cora studied alone or with Hermione. Together they made sure they would pass this test. They offered to help the boys but neither seemed very interested in the girl's studying methods.

Hermione had turned in early the night before, babbling about how a good nights rest was part of the good grade but Cora just wanted to get something straight before she laid down. There were a few questions she just couldn't seem to get right and she wanted to be sure she was confident in every answer for the next day.

She was the last one in the common room, sitting directly in front of the fire in her happy place. She got good lighting and it was warm. She never understood how the common room was always a little cold even as the weather grew warmer.

The portrait opened and Cora looked up as an absentminded Harry walked in. He jumped when he noticed Cora sitting on the floor but calmed quickly when he realized it was her.

"A bit jumpy are we?" She asked, giggling a little.

"A bit." Harry wasn't very pleased.

"You alright, Potter?"

"Would you believe me if I said I was fine?" Harry whined.

"Not at all. Unless you need me to, then absolutely."

Harry smiled weakly and Cora patted the spot next to her. He sat down and hugged his knees in, watching the flames dance. Cora put her cards down and watched him.

This boy's mood and face changed so much she couldn't tell what he was feeling anymore. Sometimes she thought she had a good grasp on it and then it would change and she would be completely wrong.

"Wanna talk about whatever it is you're feeling?" Cora asked.

"Not really." Harry replied quietly.

"Alright then um... are you ready for tomorrow?" She continued.

"Not at all."

Cora nodded and bit the inside of her cheek, trying to think.

"You should conjure your patronus." She said abruptly. The thought came quickly and she didn't give herself enough time to think about it.

"What?" Harry finally looked at her.

"Your patronus. Come on." Cora stood up and pulled out her wand but Harry didn't follow. She tugged on his sweater. "Come on, I'm serious."

Harry sighed and stood up, pulling out his own wand.

"How exactly is this gonna help, Cora?" He grumbled.

"You said it yourself that to conjure your patronus, you need to think of the happiest moment in your life. Maybe this will help your mood. All the patronus' are super cute too so how could it not." Cora shrugged.

Harry nodded. He seemed to understand what she was trying to say but she could tell he didn't really believe it would work.

"Expecto Patronum." Cora casted. She had been thinking about that spell since the day they learned it. Even though everyone only got it the day they were caught, it was still something very joyful to think about.

Her baby hippogriff flew around and nuzzled into Harry before cuddling into a couch cushion.

"Your turn."

Harry sighed and nodded, closing his eyes. Cora watched him closely and in a few seconds, he was ready to say the spell. His patronus was a stag and he was beautiful.

Together, their patronus' played while the two watched.

Harry smiled and it only brightened Cora's. Finally, something made him crack. Finally, Cora would see the light in his eyes again. The two stayed focused, making sure their patronus' wouldn't wither away. Watching them play was therapeutic and the most adorable thing Cora had seen in her life.

"You're very talented." Harry said suddenly.

Cora looked at him, still smiling. "Thanks. Reading helps."

"I think even without the books you would be extraordinary." Harry replied.

"Well I wouldn't say extraordinary." Cora shrugged, rolling her eyes playfully.

Harry laughed. "No I mean that."

Cora dared to look into his eyes and she was stuck. This was something she had been trying to avoid since their almost kiss but here she was again. Stuck in the same place, same spot, with Harry leaning in again.

This time it was her who rested her forehead on his. She felt his arms wrap around her waist, gently pulling her in but she couldn't. What he had said before was stuck in the back of her mind. She felt her patronus disappear and that made everything worse.

"Harry..."

"I don't care."

"Yes you do." She said quickly. "You have to..."

"Why?"

"Because life is dangerous enough for you as it is."

Cora pulled away first and took a deep breath, doing her best to keep the tears at bay.

"Cora..."

"Please..." She begged. "Look at me and tell the truth. Be honest with yourself. You're hurting. Things didn't go as planned. Hermione, Ron and me. We've been by your side through it all this year. I've been a good friend. You don't like me more than that."

"I... I don't know." Harry whispered.

"Yeah." Cora whispered back. "There's a lot happening right now. You come back when you're sure yeah?"

Harry nodded and Cora decided that would be it for the night. She picked up her notes and her books, closing them and clutching them to her chest as she stood up.

"Don't stay up too late. We have the OWL's tomorrow." She kissed his cheek softly and went up to her room.

Setting the books on her bedside table, Cora got ready for bed quietly to not disturb any of the other girls. She was not going to be the reason Lavender woke up pissy the next morning.

Cora got in bed but wasn't able to settle before Hermione climbed in quickly. Cora turned onto her side as her best friend got settled.

"He likes you." She whispered.

"He doesn't know what he wants. Not now." Cora replied.

"Is it so bad to let him in?" Hermione frowned.

"For us and only us... no. But this isn't just about us. I know you feel it too Hermione but a war is coming. And everything I was taught... everything I grew up knowing is against Harry. Everything except the real me. The me my family doesn't understand. The me who is your best friend... it's gonna be a different fight for me than it is for all of you." Cora explained.

"I understand." Hermione gave Cora's arm a gentle squeeze. "No matter what happens, you know I'm here for you?"

Cora nodded. "I know."

Hermione nodded and closed her eyes. Cora knew she couldn't say what she really wanted to say. Hermione would have understood but not in the way Cora needed her to. Hermione was there for her, as a friend... as family... and that's exactly what Cora was so afraid of.