Self harm. Cutting. I cut the top of my thigh so it was always covered no matter what time of year it was. In summer my cuts were still covered but I had my hands in my pockets 24/7 holding down my shorts. My cuts were bright red. If I didn't like what someone was doing to me, even if I didn't have a blade, my hand would be swiping across my leg as saying I had to cut at that moment.
I had a blade that no one knew about. It was kept in my room in a bag at the end of my bed that no one even looked at.
When I cut myself it kinda gave me a feeling of relief while also giving me thought of "why am I still here"
I was happy cutting until my mum found my cuts on NYE. I told her I just fell and spent the whole day in my room.Mum keep checking on me and I'm guessing it was to make sure I wasn't cutting.
My friend got into my iPod and went onto my direct messages on Instagram witch were private for a reason and found the message I sent to my best friend. She told me to show her my cuts, so I did. She asked me how kind I bleed for, I replied with I didn't bleed because I didn't. Then what she said next was so rude. "You know the whole reason of self harm is to bleed." BITCH!!!! There are many different reasons for self harm. 1. I cut myself because the pain after I cut was a great feeling to me. 2. No sympathy for me, no are you okay, no why did you cut??. You are just a little bitch. You call yourself my friend and the worse part is that it feels horrible without you around.
My New Years resolution for 2015 was to be happier. Witch meant I had to stop cutting. I was good for the first part but now it's getting really hard.
ESTÁ A LER
A depression story
Não ficçãoI have depression. And I need to talk about it but there is know one who would want to listen
