Stucky Halloween: 2020

Bad Ideas

"Why didn't I see this coming, of course using your arm as a baseball bat would end poorly!"

"Hey," Bucky retorted, "you're the one who said you needed a hand, so this is really on you, pal."

Steve grabbed his collar and pulled him into an alleyway, away from the pursuing "cops", who were really armed-to-the-teeth thieves.

"Arm," Bucky instructed, and Steve handed it over. While Bucky secured it back into place, Steve looked wildly around for what would surely be inspiration for the second worst idea they'd had all day.

Over the fence were a pack of stray dogs, and the cops were closing in. Steve mentally cursed and looked at Bucky.

"So?" Bucky panted. Steve made a face and pointed to the dogs.

"We climb the fence, outrun the dogs, and the dogs will attack the thieves."

Bucky blinked. "Steve -- what happened to that brain, huh? Where'd it go?"

"Look, we have one brain cell and it's my turn to use it, and that's what we're going with," Steve shot back, stubbornly putting his plan into motion. Bucky said a silent prayer and followed suit.

////

Collapsing back home, Steve winced over the bite in his leg and Bucky shakily sank to sit against the door, staring blankly at the ground.

"I hate to speak the obvious, but that -- " He grimaced and rolled his neck. "That was a bad idea."

"Yeah," Steve breathed, looking at him, exhausted. "Any other bad ideas anytime soon?"

"Not that I can think of," he said with a groan as he pushed himself up. Steve watched him leave and sighed.

////

The next bad idea was a Steve Rogers special; falling from a plane without a parachute.

"Sh*t--!"

"Language, Rogers," came Bucky's automatic reply while he scouted the ground for any straggling robots. Steve flailed in the air hundreds of feet above.

"Sam? Gonna need a ride, like, any second!"

Bucky frowned as Steve made no quick retort. "Steve, you okay?"

Steve tried to stall his falling, stared as the ground came steadily closer. He pressed a finger to his comms and hesitated a second. "Well, ah, I'm currently falling -- from the sky, so-- "

"What?" Bucky yelped as he crushed the remains of a robot crawling underfoot.

"It wasn't my fault this time!"

"You idiot, Steve-- "

Sam could hear them bicker as he flew up to Steve, rolling his eyes. "You guys are cute, what you have," he yelled at Steve over the wind as he grabbed him.

"Yeah. Cute," Steve agreed sarcastically as Sam took them both to the ground. Bucky stalked over to them, clearly not amused. Steve held up a hand to stop him mid rant.

"Gimme a second to catch my breath, then you can be mad."

Bucky stood with his arms folded. "I'm waiting."

Sam heard the metallic whir of a robot and pounced to tear it apart. Bucky didn't budge, eyes boring into Steve's own while the blond struggled for an explanation.

"Guys -- little help -- "

"So you can't be mad at me if it was an accident," Steve wrapped up, eyeing the disaster behind Bucky, who sighed and turned to help.

"You're not out of the woods yet, Rogers," he called over his shoulder.

"Yeah, yeah," he muttered to himself as he jogged over to help.

////

Out of all the bad ideas they'd ever dreamt, Bucky initiated possibly the worst one. It was a quiet evening, nothing special at all; they were sitting against the couch on the floor, watching a Disney movie Steve had been dying to watch.

"I am not like Merida, what are you talking about?" Steve snorted as he kept his eyes on the screen. Bucky smiled fondly.

"Y'know, patriotic, stubborn -- "

"Yes, Captain America, the well-known Scottish archer," he said sarcastically, but grinned nonetheless at him. Bucky shrugged and caught himself staring at Steve's lips. The worst part -- Steve himself had noticed. "What?" he asked, softer, still teasing. Bucky met his eyes.

"This is probably a bad idea," Bucky muttered before moving in swiftly, pressing his lips against Steve's.

A jolt of lightning ran up Steve's spine and he ran his fingers through his hair, breaking apart to say, "seems like the only good idea you've had in a while, Barnes."

////

*Insert "it was a bad idea" by girl in red*

I really liked this one, I had a lot of fun with it!