Lost on the path of life

He's here but he's gone

You make efforts to deal with your feelings and not let them take over you. You eat with Ande even when you don't feel like it. You get closer to Kakashi and don't let each other fall too deep into the darkness. He's still the quieter one but you've learned to enjoy the silence. It's never embarrassing, it's never missing something. You stop walking behind Ande and Shisui and start entering the conversations. Nothing has changed between them, you must have misread the situation, because nothing romantic was happening, just two friends sharing dessert. In spite of all this effort you're making to feel alive, the pain is still there. It never goes away, you just learn to live with it.
Shisui is trying to break through your shell but you've built it well. On your way home, if you lag behind or don't answer him or seem lost in thought, he will grab your hand and hold it for the rest of the way, or put a hand around your shoulders and forget it there. You're afraid to respond the same way. You don't dare hope anymore. You accept it and thank him when you reach home. He's disheartened and watches your window for a few good minutes before going home. You start hanging out with Minato's team again and you can sense that there's something still broken between them. Obito was the glue keeping them together, but they're making efforts to be there for each other, especially Rin, asking about how you are, making sure Kakashi is alright. He responds to her openly and plainly, she understands him better than I do?  But you don't let those thoughts get too deep she should, she's someone forever encrusted in his soul now.
You're getting taller, stronger, more muscular, curvier, no more missing teeth, but no matter how hard you try, you're still slightly behind both Kakashi and Shisui. You no longer care about it, you don't even bring up the hokage title anymore. That dream is no longer yours. It never was, that dream was only there as an excuse to tie your destiny with Obito's.

One day, Kakashi comes to your house like a storm. He doesn't say a word, gets you up on his back and runs with you to the hospital in a frenzy.

"What happened?" 

He doesn't answer, he's running as fast as he can. You don't push, it scares you. Something happened. Thank God Kakashi is alright, I don't know what I'd do if...

When you arrive, you see Obito on the bed, sleeping, half of his body white and deformed. You stand in the doorway for a while. You don't dare enter and you don't dare blink. Could it really be... You collapse on the floor, forehead touching the cold tiles, crying your heart out. You're wailing. Kakashi is watching you calmly, rubbing your back gently. He knows you needed to let all of that out, he feels sorry he couldn't help you get it out sooner, it would have helped both of you. When your sobs become rarer and turn into hiccups, Kakashi helps you get up and hugs you for a long time. He hates touching. You can't remember feeling his touch accidentally, it was always in intense moments. It feels like you've been in a nightmare for the last few months and now you've just woken up to real life, to a life you didn't dare hope for, a reality so sweet you're scared you might be dreaming. You hold Kakashi's hand tight and sit on a chair next to Obito's bed, you only let go of his hand when you fall asleep and it happens involuntarily.
You ignore his requests for food or bathroom. He doesn't insist.

"What happened to Rin?" you ask, embarrassed you didn't notice sooner that she's missing.

"She tried to kill herself, I almost killed her, Obito came out of nowhere, shoved her away, I made a hole in him instead but it was hollow, not sure what that half of his body is made of. She has the two-tail inside, it came out and brought ravage around it, but we sealed it back inside her, she's in a coma, but she's still alive, they're finding ways of waking her up." Kakashi says all of that without stopping for air. He needed it to be over and a thing of the past.

"And Obito?"

"He's just asleep."

"HE'S JUST ASLEEP?" You proceed to shake him violently, he's slowly opening his eyes. You scream excited