My Mishti Is Changed✅

Chapter 2

She went to the washroom and cleaned the coffee, but the burns couldn't be removed after washing from water, not the burns on her hand or abdomen, but the burn that she got on her heart.

She goes to her room and goes up on the first floor of her room. She opened the drawer and took her diary. She remembers the last time she wrote in her diary. It was the day of her and Kunal's engagement day. She didn't have to use it after she found her Ajeeb Rajwansh. She sat on the ground and leaned her back on the wall.

She opened her diary and caressed her fingers on her written things. She took out a fresh paper and put the dairy on her thighs , took a pen from the holder, and started writing.

kehta ye pal
khud se nikal
jeete hain chal
jeete hain chal
jeete hain chal

gham musaafir tha jaane de
dhoop aangan mein aane de
jeete hain chal
jeete hain chal
jeete hain chal (the song continued)

She wiped her tears as it was paining more inside her heart than the burn on her hand and abdomen.

Hi Dairy. (20-08-2020 Thursday)

I didn't use you for a full 1 year, but as you know, my life was never a sweet chocolate. Instead, it was just like a bitter guard. So I again came to take your support. I thought I would never use you again, but again, I had to use you. again, I came to talk to you. Again, I came to talk to my non-living best friend. You know what happened today. (she wrote all the things that happened and continued writing)

Abir would have spoken to her that it was her fault! Can't he say her to walk slowly? Can't he see that it was her fault? Can't he see my pain? Can't he just talk to Kuhu and make her understand that always bursting on silly or on their own fault is not good? Can't he make her understand to accept her own faults and not to give the credit of her faults to anyone else? Can't he take a stand for me(a tear escaped her eyes and fell on the paper)? Does kuhu's happiness matter more than my pain???

(she put her one hand on her mouth that no sound comes)

Can't he be impartial in taking a stand? Can't he see that the magazine problem was not created by me?? Can't he say her that throwing tantrums on me would wake the question on my self-respect?? Can't he make her understand that anyone else has a self respect too other than her?? Can't he just do this instead of standing... and... Looking at her and rolling his eyes.

hichki ruk jaane de
siski tham jaane de
is pal ki ye guzaarish hai
marna kyun jee lena
boondon ko pee lena

She kept her one hand on her mouth and others, covering both her eyes and crying. She again opened her diary

Don't cry! Stop it!! You are not your badimaa's kaacnh ki gudiya. You are strong!! Be strong!! Don't be sensitive!! Just forget it and move on. You have to do it many more times. You have to compromise in this because kuhu is immature and child, but when will she grow up!? Till when will I be able to compromise!? Why don't I have the right to say someone who is doing wrong?? You can't do it, Mishti, because now you are married and your decision will affect both families. If I won't forget kuhu's words, then this family is gonna break brutally, and my tag of a broken family girl breaks family will become permanent in my life. I hate you, mom, dad!! why didn't you kill me after you came to know about me?? Why do you let me grow in your womb and not kill me!? There were many options to get rid of a baby that hadn't come in your life yet, and if you had killed me, I would not have to bear all this! All the tags that I got, from muhboli, street puppy, garbage, and a girl who only know how to break a family. why did you and Papan't kill me!?? Don't you remember me? Don't you remember one of the parts that you had left behind?? Now I feel so unwanted. I feel like nobody loves me now. My life would have been better if you would let me in a river or deep inside the jungle or in a fire!! But this is so bad! why did you leave me? I hate my dadi. Did she even have one per cent of love for me? You left for your new life!! Why did you leave me?? Is it because I am a girl or you started hating me after I became closer to my taiji? (Akshara) But that wasn't my fault again!! A child goes where he/she gets more happiness, and you didn't even care if I ate something or not. It was always taiji who used to feed me. She did all the duties of a mother when I was a child. (Tears fell on the paper)