scars || sirius black

30 - he didn't have a choice

Emmy went over to Lily's the weekend before school started back after Christmas. Her older sister, Petunia, left them alone thankfully. She'd become a bit of a tyrant in recent years, no one really wanted her around.

Lily's parents were sweet though and greeted Emmy warmly, even suggesting she could come to stay overnight sometime.

The two went for a long walk through the field's behind the Evans' house in the late afternoon, just as the sky was beginning to darken. It was beautifully peaceful, just what they needed for a long chat.

As they crunched through the frosty grass, Lily spoke.

"You know James wrote to me last week?"

"Ah did he now?" crooned Emmy, smirking.

Lily grinned, "Well as a matter of fact I have been meaning to tell you that we're actually together now."

"Oh, I'm so happy for you! I mean finally!"

"Well we had to get over the whole bullying thing but he's changed. He's a better person now, learned from his mistakes, though he's not perfect-"

"Who really is?" interrupted Emmy.

"Exactly and I'm just kind of... a little bit in love with him..."

"My heart can't take it," giggled Emmy pretending to faint against a tree.

They both burst out laughing.

"You know he loves you so much, Lily. I mean it's no secret he's always liked you, but it's seriously impressive you've kept this under wraps for so long."

"We just wanted to take it slowly, I was so mad after he kissed me at that quidditch match but then I realised that I did actually quite enjoy it and I just thought why the hell not?" she giggled.

"You two are too cute, I literally can't take it anymore."

Lily let out a breathy laugh and paused before saying.

"But he told me about what happened with Sirius and I just... I just want to make sure you're okay?"

Emmy's heart sank at the very memory of what had happened.

"I fine really, just shaken up and worried for him of course. I mean, he turned up on Christmas Eve, covered in bruises and cuts, wouldn't let anyone touch him until I came down. But it was scary, Lils, I've never seen him like that."

"How's he doing now?"

"Better, but still not himself. I think he misses Regulus, wonders what's happened to him now he's gone. I keep telling him that he only survived because he left when he did, and that Reg made a choice, one that didn't include him."

"Definitely, it's not his fault at all. But I need to know... does he have the... you know?" Lily asked cautiously.

Emmy found herself unable to speak, the knot in her throat so tight she could barely breath, and tears threatening to spill over.

"He didn't have a choice," she choked out and Lily immediately wrapped her in a hug, coming to a stop. They stayed there for a while while Emmy sobbed into her shoulder.

"He's going to be ok, Emmy. Trust me, that boy has been through hell and back and survived."

"Can he do it twice?"

—————

As they arrived back Lily's father was just relighting the fire for the evening and her mum was setting the dinner on the table.

They shrugged off their icy coats and wellies before hurrying through to the warmth of the kitchen for steak pie.

The conversation was light but pleasantly normal. Mr and Mrs Evans were simply lovely, treating Emmy with the greatest of kindness' and interest, asking her questions all about France and the upcoming second task. Lily's sister Petunia sat at the end of the table in furious silence with her lips tightly pursed and her back straight.