scars || sirius black

5 - the fallout

Everything hurt.

Her throat was like sandpaper, her muscles screamed every time she move, and the throbbing in her head was never-ending. 

The sound of a chair squeaking caught her attention and made her wince. Sirius was sitting next to her and had just noticed her opening her eyes.

"Hey Emmy," he said, his voice croaking as if he hadn't spoken in a long while.

"Sirius?" she replied in confusion. Spotting Remus lying motionless in the bed next to hers made her move to reach him, but Sirius quickly reached over to grab her hand,

"Look just lie down, he's going to be fine, just sleeping right now," he said with a sad look in his eyes.

"What happened?" she croaked. "I'm-I'm bleeding..."

"Damn it!" exclaimed Sirius, panicking as she lifted the bedsheets to show him her ribs. She could feel the blood soaking through the bandages but couldn't bare to look.

"Wait here," he called as he ran to find Madame Pomfrey.

"Where else am I going to go?" she mumbled, slumping back against the pillows trying desperately to ignore the pain.

The nurse hurried over and began fussing, despite Emmy's protests. She was used to it after all.

But it was nice having someone there this time, Sirius stayed by her side the entire time as the healing spells were cast. Biting her cheek to avoid screaming as dried blood was removed from the wounds, she felt his hand squeeze hers.

Once the Madam Pomfrey had left, he sat back down and pulled the chair closer to her bed.

"What happened Sirius?" Emmy whispered.

He looked up at her and took a minute before he could speak. He stuttered a few throaty notes then managed to say,

"You attacked each other."

Emmy closed her eyes.

All she could hear in her mind was screams. Her screams. Of anger and frustration and pain.

"There was nothing you could have done, Emmy. It wasn't your fault," he murmured.

"I should never have come. He would have been better off without me. Better off if I'd just stayed away."

"You don't mean that."

"I do. He doesn't want me here, does he?"

"Emmy, of course he does," he replied and reached over to take her hands. She traced soft circles in them as he continued, "I have never seen Remus as happy as when he talks about you. Did you know that he's spent hours just telling us about you. His face lights up when he talks about you playing in the forest behind your house, or how proud he is you. He showed us all those letters you sent over the years, you know he kept every single one? Even replied to them too, not that he ever sent them, the idiot."

He laughed softly as he looked over at Remus dozing in the next bed.

Emmy smiled, it was comfort at least to know that she did mean so much to him. He wasn't really one to bear his soul to anyone and they'd only only talked a few times since making up a week or so ago. They mostly just sat together, enough was said by the silence.

"Thank you, Sirius," she said, squeezing his hand, "For everything."

—————

After another night in the hospital wing, Emmy was well and truly done with the stiff white sheets, bright light and Madame Pomfrey's incessant fussing. The only respite was being able to speak to Remus; if one good thing came of that night it was the time they got to spend together in the days that followed, talking about their lives over the past ten years until their throats ached.