"I don't wanna live anymore, I've lost all my will." He sank more into his seat, with his shoulders slumping down heavily. Tears that were on bay, now rolled down his cheek which he harshly wiped away.
"You knew..." his friend breathed out who was sitting beside him, earning his lost attention. "You knew how he matters to you, to your heart, yet....yet you never spoke to him, and when you did, you were too harsh and cold, that never helped him neither to you. You had time and chance but only to be wasted. So now regrettably you're bound to cry and suffer." He stared at his friend who lost few more tears and sobbed hard. He stared at the pale face, the hollow beneath eyes, the faintly sinking cheeks, the stubbles on the chin. He looked awful as if his own death is tomorrow. He knew that his words won't bring any comfort to his friend, but anyway he wanted to speak of this.
"I am bound to cry." Agreed the miserable man, nodding his head. "Now I have to live this way."
"But you aren't living my friend." his friends words made him tear up more.
"I used to. When I use to see him, smiling, playing around, giggling. I felt alive." His small smile dead as he looked up to his friend. "I want him..." he whispered. "I want him so bad." he clutched the coat of his friend who soothed his fingers on shoulders. "I can't live without him." his voice wavered. ... "Please..."
"Stay strong. You'll pass this hard time and pain soon, Jungkook..." ..............
Jungkook swiftly woke up from his dream, panting heavily and as usual tears rolling down on flushed cheeks. His hairs disheveled from thrashing around the bed. And the pain in his heart was safocating him. He walked to the mirror to see himself. His eyes werr blood shot red and tears brimming, with his running down nose that he quickly wiped off through his t-shirt. He brushed his hair properly and fixed the falling t-shirt from shoulder, while wondering everything about those dreams that occurs.
These dreams are so painful as if I went through it. Everything felt so real. And who I'm yearning for? Who is that? Why was I crying? above all of that why am I constantly dreaming of this?
He tried to sooth himself through the morning fresh air in balcony. Leaving all questions regarding those dreams (which visits him for quite few days) he went to get ready for office.
.
.
.
"Hey mom." jungkook hadn't met his mother since he had arrived yesterday. He drank too much in the office last evening so he passed out and woke up in the middle of the night. And came home at the dawn.
"Hm." His mother's face was cold and didn't hugged him as she does always in the morning and whenever they meet after quite time.
"What happened mom?" Taeyon shook her head for 'no' and gave a little cold shrug of shoulder but that poker face depicted the upset clearly to Jungkook.
"Are you upset because I came home yesterday but showed up now?" he asked. "I'm sorry mom. You know I'm a workaholic. I couldn't help but go to the office first."
Taeyon didn't gave any response just served him the tea and breakfast. Though her heart was softening for his son's apology but the way he coldly behaved with Seokjin angered her. She felt sympathy for that poor boy who has his life hanging on thin thread. That caused her anger and upset to be too high to forgive her son.
She looked at Jk who seemed to be waiting for response. She cleared her throat. "Don't overthink. I told I'm fine. Now eat." she gave her best reply.
"Only if you say so." Jungkook said and nodded slightly not buying the answer but anyway dugged into his food. Before he takes first bite his phone ranged which stopped him from eating and answer the device.
