The Connoisseur

Chapter 24 - Indexed

Alexander seemed confused.  “But it will reassure you on everything I’ve said.  Without that how can...”

“I don’t need to read it, Alex.”

They stared out over the library in silence for a few moments.  The deep orange light outside had neither brightened nor dimmed.  In this room, it seemed, it was permanently dusk in July.

“I’m not saying that I have some implicit trust in you,” said Sophia gently.  “And I’m not saying that because you dropped the ‘L’ word, all is forgiven.  Sometimes I have no idea what to think about you.  But you don’t need to prove anything more.”

“Are you sure?  I feel like...”

“Yes.  I’m sure.  The other day, in London, I...God, I am getting used to this if I can call 1895 ‘the other day’.”

“I think you are,” said Alexander.  A smile appeared on his tired face. 

Sophia matched it.  “Then I’m going to say it again.  The other day, I was in a mess myself.  It wasn’t your fault.  I thought all this was some insane dream, that being with you was always wonderful, with no exceptions.  I know we had a little spat in Ctesiphon, but that ended well, didn’t it?”

“It did.”

“But then Oscar told me those things.  I suppose that I thought the dream was really a nightmare, that it was all a sham.  I went from one extreme to the other.  When he told me...”

Dampness appeared in the corner of her eyes, and she tried to stop herself from crying.  Alexander took her by the shoulder.

“Don’t cry.  You don’t need to say anything.”

“No, I do,” she continued, taking shallow breaths.  “When he told me about Thaïs and Imperia, I suppose I imagined...Christ, this is pathetic...I imagined that I was just another girl for you, some random babe for you to hang off you arm for as long as you pleased.  You can’t have many problems getting women into bed, after all.”

Alexander coloured.  “Well, I...”

“But I don’t believe that now.  I didn’t even believe it then, it was just this stupid fear.”

“I understand.  It’s I who should be feeling guilty about this.”

“No.  We both should.  Because, do you know what?  Just being your short-term companion, girlfriend, whatever, that would have been fine.  You’re allowed to do that, I’m allowed to do that.  Not all relationships should last forever.  So, yes, I’m okay with what you do, and how you live your life.  Even if it is a bit weird.”

They laughed together, and Sophia wiped her eyes.  ‘A bit weird’.  Not quite the right phrase for the time-traveller lifestyle, she thought, but it’ll do.

“Thank you,” said Alexander.  “I don’t quite know what to say.”

“Say, ‘Sophia, would you like to go on another date with me.’”

“I should say something about my own...”

“Ah.”  She held up a finger to his lips.  “Please, let’s forget about apologies and long-term relationship issues and who knows what about who’s future.  That day will come, but not yet.”

It has to come, said a voice in her head.  And it’s going to hurt.

Sophia smiled.  “So?”

Alexander squirmed for a moment, but then he relaxed.  For the first time that evening, a broad smile banished the sadness from his face.

“Sophia, would you like to go on another date with me?”

“Well, I’m not sure.”  Sophia got out her phone.  “I’m very busy this week, and I’m already going out most evenings.”

Alexander shook his head, grinning.  “Really?”

“Nope.  So where are we going?”

He thought for a moment.  “If we’re going back to being a relaxed, newly-dating couple, does that mean I’m allowed to give you a very cheesy response?”

“You can do that whenever you like.”

“Then ask me again.”

“So,” said Sophia, deliberately taking her time, “Where are we going?”

Alexander leaned in close.  “Everywhere.”

They locked gazes, laughed, and embraced.

*

Alexander certainly gets around.  Do you think he's really done enough to convince Sophia of his good intentions?  Perhaps it's Sophia who should be questioned - has she gone back on her earlier thoughts and made this too easy for him?  After all, travelling through time is quite tempting, even if you aren't sure about the person you go with.

The music comes from the iconic Ella Fitzgerald.  Summertime seemed just right for this chapter - the lyrics are so kind and encouraging, speaking of all the best things in the world, but the music has such an underlying melancholy to it - until the halfway point, when all the sadness gets blown away by the some of the smoothest jazz you'll ever listen to.  No wonder Alexander had a thing for her.