no one requested, i came up with it!
tw: mentions of scars, burns, self deprecation, panic attack, minor swearing
this is set after the first challenge in all stars
~Alejandro's Pov~
I'm wrapping up my legs. It stings so bad. Stupid Chris. Stupid volcano. Stupid Total Drama. Stupid everything! My legs are permanently disfigured. My whole body has scars. I can't even walk. My hair grew back, but that's only because I have very fast growing hair. Heather and the rest of them came out without even a scratch. And here I am, ugly and burned. Thankfully the producers are supposedly going to edit out all the ugly scars. And also thankfully, we're in the spa hotel.
The door's locked because I don't need anyone seeing me like this. Vulnerable, weak. I finish up and start walking on my hands to the boy's room. I don't really care what time it is, I'm exhausted. I zip myself up in the sleeping bag, and try to go to sleep. My brain keeps filling with all these thoughts.
No one will ever love you anymore. You're ugly.
"Stop.." I whisper.
No. I need to put it in your head. You'll never amount to anything ever again. You're disfigured now, and no girl wants a man with flaws like that.
"Stop it!" I whisper a little louder.
No. NO ONE WILL EVER EVER LIKE YOU!
"JUST STOP!" I scream. I get out of my sleeping bag, and sit in the corner on the floor, hugging my knees. It hurts, but I'll be fine. Scott and Duncan rush in. Tears are streaming down my face, so I hide it in my knees.
"Dude, are you okay?" Scott asks.
"GO AWAY!"
"No, answer the question. Are you okay?" Duncan demands.
"LEAVE ME ALONE!"
"Lift your face right now. What the hell is wrong?"
"NOTHING! NOW LEAVE ME ALONE!"
Then the girls showed up. Heather, Jo, and Gwen.
"What's going on in here? I can hear all of you yapping from downstairs." Heather says.
"ALL OF YOU, GET OUT!" I say while crying. I need to be left alone. My tears keep making my scars burn, but I deserve it. My legs hurt like hell, and I just want to go.
"Hey, you can talk to me." Gwen sits down next to me. I say nothing. I hear my other teammates whispering.
"I've never seen him like this never." "What is he going to do, off himself?" "It's probably a trick." "He's fine." "Are you sure?" "He's pulling a Leshawna to make us feel bad for him." "Yeah, but there's no cameras."
"STOP IT! LEAVE ME ALONE!" The voice in my brain starts talking again.
You are faking it. C'mon baby, let's see those FAKE tears. Your team hates you already, even the ones that haven't ever met you until today. You're nothing but a worthless disfigured failure.
"MAKE IT STOP! Please. Just make it stop." I say while sobbing. I feel someone hug me, and pull me up from the ground. I push them away, and sit back down.
"Leave me alone.." I say pushing my head back into my knees.
"It's just Duncan. Please let me comfort you, you need it."
He picks me back up and lays me on the bed. He's spooning me, and just let's me cry. He hugs me tight, and just whispers the words I needed to hear to badly.
"It's going to be okay."
~ ~
first one shot, tell me what you think!
<586 words>
