Oh You've Got To Be Joking

Plot Device: Activate!

   Never expect something to be impossible. If you do, the universe will prove you wrong. When that happens, you have to fix your own mess, and maybe, the universe will cut you some slack.

But I doubt it.

  "This is a dream. I'm dreaming. Yeah." Sarah muttered to herself. "I'm in denial. Fuck. Why does the weird shit always happen to me?! Why couldn't happen to Evie, the damn weeb would love this." The redhead was currently attempting to climb a tree, the reason was because a crow had stolen her necklace.

   Sarah grabbed at a branch, before loosing her foot and slipping, she fell, hitting the ground with a resounding thud. "UGH! Ow, ow, ow.. son of a bitch that's gonna leave a bruise. HEY YOU STUPID CROW! GIVE IT BACK!" The crow in question just looked at her, and Sarah could swear to any god that it was smirking. "Fuck you, you stupid bird. Give it!" It just sat there on the top of the tree, almost taunting her. Sarah looked around on the ground for a rock to through at it.

  That's when amidst her angry cursing, she heard someone else curse. She paused for a moment, carefully moving into the bushes and quieting down. Sarah's heartbeat started to speed up as she realized someone was close by.

Please, don't be a ninja. Don't be a ninja, don't be a ninja... She prayed silently, hugging her knees close. Her belonging were hidden nearby, as she had been trying to hunt she didn't want to risk someone stumbling across them and stealing them. Especially not the one with her future tech and Naruto merch. That would be really bad.

  Sarah kept herself as still and silent as possible as the voices and footsteps true closer. "I could have sworn there was someone here." Someone spoke, and there was voice was somewhat familiar. Sarah peered out between the leaves, and then covered her mouth, her eyes widening.

   In front of her, not far away from her hiding spot stood two men dressed in black cloaks with red clouds. Oh fucking hell. Of fucking course. Oh fuck I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die... Sarah panicked, as she watched the two Akatsuki.

"Hidan. There's no one here. Let's go, we're wasting time." Kakuzu growled at his partner who sneered at the miser. "Fuck off, I haven't sacrificed anyone in a while, and I need to kill someone soon... hey look." Hidan picked something off the ground, and Sarah felt her heart sink. It was her necklace... the stupid crow must have dropped it!

"A necklace.." Kakuzu pointed out dully. Hidan smirked. "So it's a girl that was here? Interesting, women don't usually travel alone. Hey look.." Sarah tensed. "Footprints... and a broken branch..." Hidan turned, facing her bush. Sarah tensed.

Ok, I have two options, sit here and pray they don't figure it out, and make a run for it. No, running won't work. OK, I have my pepper spray on me, I need to be ready to use it and run. Hopefully Kakuzu will be to lazy to chase me. Please be to lazy to chase me... Oh god I'm gonna die.

   Sarah's hand trembled as she clutched her pepper spray desperately, while Hidan approached the bush. She heard a chuckle, and watched as the leaves were pushed aside revealing the man's face. "Found ya!" Sarah spray Hidan in the face, before using everything she had just launch herself from the bushes and snatching his scythe. Hidan scream in pain, before cursing at her. Sarah managed to hurl the scythe in the opposite direction, before taking off as fast as her legs could carry her.

   She was never fast enough, as not seconds later Hidan caught up with her, moving in front of her easily, a long pointed blade in hand. Sarah knew he would go for her stomach, and dropped to the dirt before the spike touched her, rolling away from the maniac and kicking dirt in his face.

"You little bitch! You'll pay for that! I'm gonna make you fucking scream!" Hidan yelled. Sarah scrambled to her feet and continued to run, only making it a meter before he had her by her hair.