Chapter 11

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Heads turned to look at us as we stepped into the McDonald's, and it took me a second to realise it was because Jethro was still dressed as Peter Pan. It was surprising how quickly that became normal. For me, I mean. It definitely was not normal for these people.

Jethro didn't seem to notice, but he probably just didn't care because I found it hard to believe he was worse at noticing people's reactions to things than I was.

It was only a few moments before everyone's attention returned to their food, though. Probably after realising Jethro wasn't some sort of paid performer there to entertain their kids.

Jethro led me over to a table in the back corner. "Okay, what do you want?"

He was going to order for me? Wow, dates were great.

"A cheeseburger, large fries, and an orange juice."

Jethro waved me away as I pulled out my wallet. "Nah, I've got it."

"You're gonna order for me and pay? I can't think of a way to express my absolutely genuine appreciation for this McDonald's date that doesn't sound sarcastic, but I am sincerely thoroughly seduced."

Jethro grinned. "I figured you'd prefer something lowkey."

"Jethro, nothing is lowkey when you're dressed like that, but I have no complaints."

"I dress to impress." He tilted his head from side to side in consideration. "Well, to impress myself, mostly. And you."

"I am impressed." Perpetually, and by a lot more than his tights.

Jethro grinned. "Okay, food time. Wait here."

I immediately pulled out my phone and started messing around on it, not really doing anything, just distracting myself for the two minutes Jethro was away. There was something extremely challenging about just sitting and waiting, especially in public, even for a very short amount of time. I never knew what to do with not just my body, but also my mind. I put my phone away as soon as Jethro returned with the food.

"Thank you," I said, and Jethro smiled, and goddamn he was pretty. I shoved a few fries into my mouth, chewed, and swallowed, and they churned in with the butterflies already dancing around in my stomach.

"You look nervous," Jethro said. "Or something. I think you have extra emotions I don't even have labels for."

"Oh, no, they're the same emotions, I just feel so many of them that they form compound emotions," I explained. "This one is nervous attraction, where my boyfriend is so hot it activates my fight or flight instincts."

Jethro propped his chin up on his fist and gave me an uncertain smile. "Thank you, but also that sounds kind of bad?"

I nodded thoughtfully as I slowly chewed another fry. "It's... a thing to deal with, I guess. Like, when I first got Pippi I was so excited about it that it actually made things worse for a while. I was obsessed with getting a dog, and then everything to do with taking care of a dog and training her. It was all I cared about and I was thinking about it so much that I couldn't sleep or focus on school. I loved her so much that until I'd worked it out of my system a bit it was actually kinda destructive."

"Oh," Jethro said. "Are you having those problems now because of me?"

"No," I said. "This is different, it's just... I'm trying to explain how good things can be bad things for me but also still good things, you know?"

He didn't look like he knew, but he was watching me so intensely it was clear he was trying to.

I pressed my lips together for a moment and thought. "I think, for me, nothing can only heighten good emotions. When I really care about something, it loops into anxiety and other things as well. But that doesn't mean it's bad, or... uh. I mean I don't like it, but it's not like..."

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