Bella in the Deep End

Chapter 36

We finally pulled up to Addison's house, music blaring from her backyard.

The second I stepped out of the car, I regretted the dress. I was truly freezing to death. I quickly threw the jacket I brought over my shoulders, the fabric doing nothing for my bare, goose-bumped legs and chattering teeth, and followed Gabriel through the side gate to the backyard.

There, Addison, Cara, and Anna were dancing to the loud music, slices of cheese pizza in one hand and recyclable cups in the other, spilling alcohol onto the deck.

"HEY!" Cara screamed when she saw us. She ran over and hugged us both. "Anna, meet Bella and Gabe. Guys, meet Anna. She is amazing! She is a Sagittarius; she's insane. I love her!"

"Hi, Anna. It's nice to finally meet you." I smiled.

"Addison won't shut up about you." Gabe added.

"She's a goddamn liar!" Anna shouted, putting on a sarcastic serious face and a Southern Accent. "I didn't do what she claims, I swear."

Addison rolled her eyes as she snaked her arms around Anna's waist. I bit my lip to stop myself from gushing about how cute they were together.

"So, you guys are... dating?" Anna asked, pointing between Gabe and I. I felt the colour drain out of my face.

"No! No, no. Just friends." I stuttered.

"Yeah, Bella prefers jocks with anger issues." Gabe jabbed.

"Oh, fuck off." I complained. Gabe just shrugged, refusing to see what an ass he was being.

"What? Was it something I said?" Gabe questioned sarcastically.

"I am so close to just fucking head-butting you. You know I'll do it." I threatened playfully.

"You are like five feet tall, I don't think can reach my head."

I turned to the girls, but they just shrugged and returned to dancing. I grabbed a slice of cheese pizza, stuck my middle finger to Gabe, and joined the dance circle.

Only five minutes after starting to dance, I got a cramp in my stomach from the pizza, and sat down, the rest of the girls following and turning the music down.

"So Anna," Cara started. "What are your intentions with our dear Addison?"

"Oh, the usual. Get her pregnant, steal her money, run away to Hawaii. Is that cool?" She joked, us all laughing along. She seemed to be fitting into the group well.

"What are you planning to do after school?" I asked, actually trying to get to know her.

"Study engineering in college." She answered.

"She's going to work for NASA!" Addison beamed. "We are going to be the most adorable couple, the astronaut and the journalist."

Anna turned to her and smiled, leaning in to kiss her. I looked away. Something about them being able to just... kiss. They just know how the other feels and those feelings are reciprocated. It gently broke my heart.

I turned to Gabe, who was sitting to my left.

"Hey," I whispered, grabbing his attention. "Can we talk?"

Gabriel, looking slightly concerned, set down his cup and stood up, following me to the side of the house where the conversation could be private.

He stood over me, looking down waiting for me to start talking. I found myself utterly dumbstruck.

"Nice party, right?" I laughed nervously.

"Yeah, my favourite part was when you dragged me to the side of the house to note how nice the party is." He answered.

This was harder than I expected. I looked up into his eyes, melting into them. Why did I have to tell him? Couldn't he just figure it out on his own? That would make my life a lot easier.

I clasped my hands together awkwardly, rubbing them together to try and warm myself up.

"Are you cold? I'm sure you can borrow some sweatpants and a shirt." He suggested, instantly infuriating me.

"Do you have a problem with my outfit?!" I demanded, more than happy to change the subject.

"You know what? Yeah. I have a problem with it."

"Oh, you do? Pray tell, what is your issue, good sir." I spat. I don't think it's possible to have a conversation with Gabriel without it spiralling into an argument.

He looked me up and down. "Its distracting." My stomach imploded into a flutter of butterflies.

"Its distracting?" I dared him, ignoring the butterflies. "Why is it distracting?"

"Because I have the same one at home and I was told it was a limited edition, I just wanna know how you managed to get one too." I was not in the mood for his sarcastic comments right now.

"God, you are so annoying!" I screamed. "Would it kill you to just throw one compliment my way? Just one, even a pity one."

"Why do you want me to compliment you?!"

"Because I like you!" I spat back, my eyes widening as I realised what I'd said.

"What?" He muttered, barely a whisper.

"I like you. As more than a friend." I admitted. Gabe remained silent, in a state of shock. "Can you say something? Anything?"

"Of course you do!" He shouts, suddenly furious. "Bella, don't fuck with me like that."

"What?" I questioned. "I'm not trying to fuck with you."

"And you just happened to decide to tell me today?"

"I... I thought that was the right thing to do."

"You're pathetic. Really, you are." I couldn't believe the words coming out of his mouth. "After we have that deep conversation on the way here. I thought we... I thought we were getting somewhere, to a point of mutual respect or something."

I couldn't understand what was happening. My eyes started to burn and I could feel my heart hurting. It physically hurt. I didn't know what to do but run away. I rushed into the house, heading for Addison's room. I slammed her bedroom door and threw myself onto her bed, unable to control the tears spilling out of my eyes.

Gabriel's words echoed through my head. "You're pathetic". Did he really think that little of me, that me thinking I had a chance with him made him that angry? I took in a shaky breath and squeezed my eyes shut, hoping everything will just fade away.

I pulled a blanket over my body, hiding the dress, that stupid dress I wore to impress him, and let the tears fall.

Never again, I thought. I will never let another boy make me feel this way ever again.