ʚɞ˚CHAPTER 4˚ʚɞ

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FINN'S POV

Last night I was able to get quite a bit of writing done. More writing than I've ever written in a long time honestly. It'd been a while since I was inspired, motivated, and had time to actually write.

It felt good. Really good.

I was able to escape reality and indulge in a world that I was in full control of.

And, although that world wasn't the best, it was better than the world I was in. But only because in that world, I actually had control. In this world? I had no control whatsoever. I was suffering just for the heck of it, it seemed.

Moving on, as good as writing had been, I eventually had to stop and go to sleep. It took me a while before I fell asleep since my thoughts just loved keeping me up at night. It also didn't help that I still hadn't found a living situation.

I was wasting time and I knew it. I needed to stop rewatching my favorite TV shows and actually start looking for new roommates. At least that's what I planned to do today.

For the first time in a long time, I woke up determined. I showered, fixed my appearance, wore nice clothes, and even ate breakfast which I never did. Of course, I ended up calling Jaiden and having a little chat with her before she had to go to work. We agreed that I needed to look for a job first, and make a backup plan just in case I wouldn't be able to find one on time.

With the money I had, I would be able to afford to live in a cheap hotel for around a month if I go on a strict diet that consists of only air. I was willing to go on that diet if there was nothing else I could do.

Jaiden considered the possibility of me staying with her but there was no way I could do that. After all, she lived in a school dorm and had a roommate. There was no way I would go to her place and stay there. Not only was it embarrassing, but it would be an inconvenience for her.

It was now 3 in the afternoon. I spent the past couple of hours looking for jobs online but now I wanted to walk around the streets and see if I could find a place that needed workers that way.

By now, Charlie was completely gone. His room was empty and all his belongings were at his new place. I was pretty much fully on my own now. I had no roommate to wake up to. No one to say goodnight to. No one to watch TV with.

I was completely and utterly alone, and it hurt. I thought I was alone before but now with Charlie out of the apartment, I was even more alone. It was scary.

Thankfully, that just pushed me to hurry up and find a roommate or two. The feeling of being alone was unbearable and I couldn't wait to move in with someone, even if I didn't like them.

I grabbed my keys, wallet, and phone quickly before rushing out of the apartment. Being in the apartment felt...horrible to be quite frank. As soon as I felt the cool air brush against my face, my mood lifted.

Obviously I wasn't just happy all of a sudden. Feelings didn't work like that. My feelings didn't work like that. But being outside made me feel freer, and I enjoyed feeling free.

Well, isn't that funny coming from a white man? But, this freedom felt more spiritual. More personal.

I no longer had that heavy weight on my chest for the time being. I was determined. My mind was set on something, and I wouldn't back out until I got it. Or so I hoped...I had no idea what the future held.

I didn't have a certain place I wanted to go to. I just planned on walking around different stores and shops and hoping to find a "NOW HIRING" sign. It probably wasn't the best way to look for jobs but there was nothing else I could do.

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