When you look at me I just can't lie

Chapter 14

Chapter 14

He kissed her senseless, he kissed her stupid, he kissed her knees weak and her heart racing. Lena had been kissed many times in her short lifetime but this was taking the cake, there was something electrifying in his hand around the nape of her neck and the fiery touch of his mouth on hers. All the intensity throughout the week leading to this moment pulsated between them and left her head was spinning.

Zander somehow got around the counter without breaking their kiss and next thing she knew he was right in front of her. His arm snacked around her waist and held her close as the kiss deepened.

The heat pouring from his body seeped past her own clothing and spread over her skin. It was intoxicating and alarming.

“Zander?” Lena’s hands moved over his chest to push him back but instead her hands gripped his shirt and held him closer. Through the haze of lust she was perfectly aware she was making out with her sister’s annoying best friend. Never in a million years was this supposed to be happening and yet here they stood engrossed in one another like nothing in the world mattered.

His hand was seconds away from slipping under her shirt when he stumbled back and sneezed.

That sure killed the mood.

Lena touched the back of her hand to her lips and hoped her cheeks weren’t too red. “You have a fever.” That’s what she was trying to tell him a minute earlier. Thinking back on it she should feel grossed out, he was sick with a pretty bad cold and it was a sure bet she was going to catch it now after that heated proximity. But she didn’t feel grossed out, she was confused sure but she liked the kiss, a lot.

He nodded. “Sorry, I thought I was getting better.” He sneezed again and turned for the oven before the pizza burned if it hadn’t already.

“I should really get back home before I do anything else completely stupid.” The haze of lust was quickly fading and that left her feeling like an embarrassed idiot. How could she have kissed him back like that? It was a huge line they just crossed.

It was a line Zander didn’t seem all that bothered by. He was acting like it was another run of the mill Saturday evening. “Are you sure?”

Lena groaned under her breath. Just for one minute she’d kill to know what he was thinking behind those seaside teal eyes of his. Her heart was racing and she felt sick with confusion, but Zander? He was the picture of cool. She cursed him. “Yeah.” The simple response was barely out of her mouth and she was already back in his room grabbing her shoes.

“Princess.” Zander’s voice stopped her two steps from the front door.

His nickname for her was his way of calling her a spoiled brat, it was a taunt she normally frowned at but this time his voice only worsened the puddle she was melting into. A part of Lena was scared and nervous and the other was completely at his mercy. “What?” she had to remind herself to be the bitch and remain strong.

“I’ll call you when I have a better time frame for the next session.”

“Sure.” With a scoff Lena was out of the door.

Lena felt like a fool and it was a sour feeling she didn’t do well with. Mel was the smart twin so that made Lena the social twin. Throughout her teenage years she always had the hot boyfriend and popular friends. Now all that was changing, the hot boyfriend wasn’t so hot and he was turning into the biggest jerk she had ever laid eyes on. And the friends? They were just part of some prepackaged image. There was no one real in her life.

No one for her to run to and cry her eyes out with while asking for advice. The prepackaged image was shattering and taking its place was a very complicated guy she shouldn’t be looking twice at. He was anti everything she was, they agreed on nothing, they fought like cats and dogs, and son of a bitch if she didn’t have feelings for him.

Zander Kale was the best part of her life right now and it was terrifying. It was a stupid crush that was only going to leave her heart broken because judging from his aloof brush off after their kiss he didn’t feel the same way. Lena could picture him at home laughing at her stupidity while eating frozen pizza.

The battle was lost as she pulled into the driveway. Fresh hot tears ran down her face. What was she going to do now with everything falling apart?

Mel was sitting on the porch and quickly took notice when Lena didn’t come running out of the car.

Lena ran her hands down her face and noticed the black feathers spanning her arm. The reminder of Zander only worsened her urge to cry. She gasped softly when Mel joined her.

“What’s up?” Mel asked, seated now in the passenger seat. “You look like you’ve been crying.”

Lena opened her mouth to remind her sister they weren’t friends and didn’t confide in each other except nothing but air escaped past her lips. With no one else in her corner it didn’t seem like such a bad idea to lean on her sister, at the end of it they were family and that carried a lacking connection in Lena’s life. “I did something stupid.”

Mel’s green eyes were inquisitive across her face. “Are you pregnant?”

“No. Geez, you sound like mom.”

“Sorry. So what is it? Is it about your idiot boyfriend? You haven’t been mentioning him much lately.”

“Andy and I are pretty much done after seeing him with that girl. I thought I was in love with him but I’m realizing lately I have no idea what being in love is. In the beginning with Andy everything was so perfect because that’s what I thought perfect was because everyone wanted what I had but I never felt lost in his arms and he never made me dizzy with a smile. I’ve never let my guard down and fallen asleep in his bed.” Lena’s thoughts and realizations raced past her mouth with quick words.

Mel nodded with a small smile. “That’s what love is. Love isn’t perfect, it’s consuming and messy.  One minute everything is perfectly in control and the next your knees are weak and your heart is so tight you think it’s going to burst but you don’t care because you know he’s there to catch you if you need him to.”

“Catching you, like giving you a safe haven when you need somewhere to think?” Lena thought back to how caring Zander had been after his fight with Andy. He let her hang around his house until she was ready to go. He made her laugh with his outrageous sense of humor and he never once told her what she should do.

“Yeah, and like punching your idiot cheating boyfriend to defend your honor.” Mel wasn’t called the smart twin for nothing. “I’d be blind not to notice how you and Zander have been talking to each other a lot more, he’s asked about you and you asked about him. Plus I can spot his art a mile away.” Mel waved to the feathers drawn on her sister’s arm.

Lena was again speechless.

Mel sighed and turned in her seat. “Don’t freak out about it.”

“Easy for you to say. None of this makes sense.”

“Not everything is supposed to make sense. For some reason after all these years you and Zander have found some level to connect on and something is happening.”

“None of this bothers you?”

Mel shrugged and wrestled with the words she wanted to say. “I don’t know. I think Zander being involved with anyone would be weird in the beginning because we haven’t crossed that bridge yet. I don’t want to see him hurt Lena.”

“I’m not hurting him, he’s hurting me. We kissed and he acted like it was no big deal. It was like some dare he created in his head and when it was over it was like it never happened. That was my stupid mistake of the day. I should’ve never gone to see him and now I’m probably gonna get sick with the flu.” Lena crossed her arms and tried not to glance down at the stupid feathers that reminded her exactly how he kissed her.

“What the hell?” the latest batch of information wasn’t something Mel was expecting. “You kissed?”

“Are you jealous? Like I said it really didn’t mean anything.”

“I’m not jealous. I’m…weirded out a little trying to wrap my head around my twin sister and best friend kissing. I don’t know what to say.”

“That makes two of us.”